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lolz
school life
soo very boring and annoying
yet very hilarious

here are some things said in my school
and yes
i wil updaate this often
most of them staring yours truly
alan

cast:
alan holmes:me
mr.sygit:carreer aplications teacher
mr.childers:algebra teacher
mr.walters:computer teachers
mr.biggs:vice principle
mr.garrison:health/PE teacher

TERMS:
DAR(diciplanary action reguest)
OSS(out of scool suspension)
ICBM(in class behavior modification-in school suspension)


JOBS-5th hour
mr.sygit:all right class what kinda jobs would u want
xzavior:presedent
gilbert:docter
me:actor
eddie:male stripper
mr.sygit:what
me:wtf
did he just say male stripper
juanita:yeah i think he did
steve:i would like to work iun a church or a synagog so i may be able to do nothing
mr.sygit:anyways im pretty sure it might not take much to be a male stripper other then shaking ur little booty in a g-string
josh:way too much information

ALAN HOMESLICE-5th hour
mr.sygit:wats up alan homeslice
me:.......
theresa:wait what did he say
jacob:wats up alan homslice
me:i swear to god i will ******** murder u jacob
mr.sygit:all right lets leave homedog alone for now
me:hehehehe funny now its my turn
wats up bald headed doucebag


GLASSES-5th hour
regein:jesus christ i cant see nothing
mr.sygit:here try these
*gives reigin his glasses*
reigein surprised h thank u jesus
xzavior:yes?
regien:these glasses are soo much better its like a new life


NINJA CHOP-5th hour
mr.sygit:alan i wiull have to have u move cause i need that spot for the overhead
me:and what if i dont
mr.sygit:then ill have to give u a ninja chop
i actualy have a pretty impressive ninja chop
me:mr.sygit u need to get out more


PUSH UPS-*last trimester 3rd hour gym
me:*yawn**leans on tennis pole*
mr.garrison:alan 10 push ups
me:why
mr.garrison:20
me:what the hell
mr.garrison:50
me:dude
mr.garrison:100
me:you doucebag
mr.garrison:150 and if u reference family guy or say anything else its 1000 now get get started


THE NEW ASHLEY-5th hour
mr.sygit surprised k now what are some effects of quitting school ashley
devon:less money and job oppertunities
mr.sygit:all right good except i asked for ashley so devon ur ew name is ashley
devon:sweet
*later*
mr.sygit:al right devon its ur turn now
devon:my names not devon its ashley
*even more later*
devon:wheres the whole puncher
jessica:up there in the desk up front
devon surprised k
yo alan wats up indeed
i said how are u alan indeed
...
indeed
me:shut up and go away ashley
and stop using my word


FISHIES-5th hour algebra
jovonah surprised h s**t i need some water *runs out of the room*
me:whats just happend what was she holding
jacob:im not sure
jovonah surprised k im back
*holding a bag with water in it*
me:is that a fish
theresa:why do u have a fish
mr.childers:better be good or ur getting a DAR
jovonah:my water broke
jacob:what the ********
mr.childers: oh my god
jovonah:dont worry its fixed
me:what?
jovonah:i got a new bag and water
ashley:jovonah ur confusing them
he bag with the water and her fish broke so she had to get another
me surprised hhh
mr.childers:why do u have a fish in school
jovonah:its for biolegy
me:if ur gonna disect it then whats the point of keeping int alive
jovonah:no were gonna study it

SOMETHING IN COMMON-1st hour
mr.garrison:ur really should start lifting weights ur a bit scrawny
tony:im not scrawny
mr.garrison:yeah u are when i was ur age i was the same gtho cause my gym coach was retarded
me:well now we finaly have something in common


THE WONDERFUL MR.BIGGS-2nd hour
me surprised k im back
gorden surprised h my god i heard u were in biggs office what happened sdid u get in trouble
me surprised h
we had a lot of fun we talked
we went on youtube and watched funny videos
we went and got a bight to eat
and he wished me good luck on the finals
gorden:really
me:no u dumbass the b***h gave me ICBM


ACT NATURAL:-hallway before third hour
james:are we allowed to be roaming the halls
me:sure as long as we dont run into-
mr.biggs:mr holmes is that u?
me:*sigh*biggs
james surprised k act natural
dont do anything u normaly would do
me:turns around and flips biggs off*
HEY BIGGS ******** U
run
*we run*
james:i said act natural
me:i know
u said dont do anything i normal wouldnt do
so i flipped him off
all we need to do is outrun him and he cant do nothing





quotes of DOOM
hilarious quotes
(NOT SAID BY ME)
lolz

subdelty is the art of saying what u think and getting out of the way before its understood

ignorence can be cured
but stupid is forever

my women and i were happy for 20 years
and then we met

everybody has the gift of stupidity
but some ppl abuse the privelage

its better to be a smartass then a dumbass

the only time i get in trouble is when im right
can i help it if thats so often

it isnt paranoia if they really are out to get u

i go through life and think
its a shame stupidity isnt painful

i dont break rules
i mearly test their endurence

ive tried to se it from ur point of veiw
i just cant get my head that far up my a**

if u cant beat them
arrange to have them beaten

try not to let ur mind wander
its too small to be out by itself

wats on ur mind
if u forgive the overstatment

teamwork is essental
it gives the enemy somthing else to shoot at

if u dont have anything nice to say
welcome to the ******** club

its called cheating
deal with it

there are no stupid questions
just stupid people





shinoholmes
Community Member
shinoholmes
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