We stayed inside the bus, waiting for the cops to arrive. Miss Clarence didn't want anybody getting out. Smart move.
A few people cry around me, others with faces so pale they seem like ceramic dolls. There aren't any snickers from the far back. I guess someone dying goes over their 'hilariously demented' point of view.
I sit quietly. There's a small nagging feeling in my chest, but I ignore it. There wasn't anything I could do. It was his own fault for walking into the street.
The nagging still pounds into me. Apparently it doesn't care that I was completely helpless to the situation.
"I...I just..." Gabriel chokes out next to me. I glance over. Swollen tearducts seem to branch out in light red veins, meeting at crystal blue orbs. Her pink glasses rest on top of her platinum curls.
"It's just...just so horrible!" she sobs into her hands. Dark trails of mascara mark the streams of saltwater.
It's one of the rare times in my life that I don't know what to do or say. I won't touch her. And my mouth doesn't seem to be working. I settle with watching her cry. She looks up from her pale hands.
"Don't you have anything to say!?" she barks at me. Her voice seems to echoe throughout my head. My teeth bite into the inside of my bottom lip. Her gaze narrows.
"How could you be so blank?! Someone just died Janie! They died! And all you can do is sit there! Are you a freak or something?!"
Her voice stings my ears with a soft burning. I taste iron in my mouth. She's right and I don't want to accept it.
"Everyone please calm down. I'm Officer Bryan."
Gabriel's eyes shoot forward. She sniffs, her sobs becoming quieter as the man in blue speaks.
I can't hear him. Gabriel's words have nestled inside my ears and made it impossible to understand anything else. The back of the seat in front of me has become my new best friend. I blink at it.
"...we ask that you please head out in single file...."
I don't hear him. He's nothing but noise.
"..we also ask that you please keep your eyes forward...."
My back of the seat friend twitches. The truth teller to my left stands. At least her mouth isn't moving anymore.
I make sure five people pass after Gabriel before stepping into the line of ceramic dolls headed off of the bus. My jaw finally relaxes, but the taste of iron is still there.
It's still hot outside, but the air has seemed to take on a much heavier form around us. It's almost enough to crush my calm face. Almost.
A shade of blue covers a lumpy mass underneath the bus' tire. My finger twitches.
The nagging starts again.
Another familiar sliding door opens. I step onto the yellow vehicle and stare down the aisle. Nobody says anything. I try to find the nearest empty seat to the door. Gabriel's sitting in it. My teeth seem to find the inside of my lip again.
I sit behind her. Next to a boy who's ears have been peirced more than need be. Studs and chains from his belt say that he's supposed to have red lines on his pale arms, but he doesn't. Black eyeliner streaks across his eyes, but they don't seem to be in any life-induced anguish.
Everything about him is a lie. Everything he wears is a contradiction. Because despite his dream to be feared and original, all I see is a scared teenager with the same pale face as everyone else on this bus.
The engine sputters and roars to life. More sobs do the same.
Not one syllable is spoken on the way to school.
· Fri Mar 13, 2009 @ 02:50am · 2 Comments