I said to my friend, "Why don't you just get rid of your cold?", and this is her long & funny explination.
Malignant Tumor

'Cause nobody's taking care of me.
I can't just will my body to fight the cold.
My cells have to wake up and go "Awshiiiit, she's sick.
To the battle stations!
Hit them with antibodies!
She's at 100 degrees, for the love of GAWD!"