Welcome to Gaia! :: View User's Journal | Gaia Journals

There are so many things that need to be said, need to be vented, it's not even funny. One one hand, I'm getting kicked out of my house within a week, and on the other hand, I've found a place that will be ready by next week, but it will be difficult keeping everything together since one of my two roommates will be going off into the military fairly soon, leaving two of us to split rent, pay bills, while I still have to afford my cell phone bill, Mana's cell phone bill, my car note... I feel like we can afford it if we're careful... but one of them doesn't want to take that chance... I could ask Isaiah what his plans are, since I'm getting a place here pretty soon... But I don't know... There's a completely different issue that I would rather not have to deal with if we were to live together.

On a completely different note, although slightly related to my last point, Mana and I have been... off and on, I suppose... I almost hit my breaking point with him, albeit emotionally... He had thought about giving me the option to end the relationship we have, in order to help myself... As tantalizing as the offer was, I wasn't sure what to do... Mana believes that things will be better one day, but as of right now, they aren't so great... We don't talk as much as we used to, partly because I'm working so much now that I'm not in school, and partly because our sleep schedules are out of sync. I'm sure he's been busy with things on his end, although I have no idea what he's been doing lately besides getting in trouble with his dad for money...

I need to talk to Isaiah, hopefully today, to see what his plans are, if he's got any. I just don't want to rely on him for this to fall through, like I did with Alexus, which is why we're in the situation that we're in... If she's leaving for the military, she might as well just stay with her boyfriend, since we're not putting her on the lease. I'm just frustrated and annoyed I guess, more at myself for not keeping up with the apartment search, but it's not like I had plenty of options from the beginning. I have half a mind to just get an apartment by myself so that I won't have to worry about anyone else not bringing up their end of the rent. Maybe I will after this first lease is over and done with. I just hate not being able to do what I want because of people having other plans, and leaving me out to dry. I've been getting the crap end of the stick since summer began, and I'm getting tired of it. I don't know what else to do... And time is running out.