Just some quotes that I find to be amusing. Don't correct me if I'm wrong ; I deserve this fleeting moment of happiness.

"Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings. "

"The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on." - Robert Bloch

"Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils ..." - Louis Hector Berlioz

"It's true that we don't know what we've got until we lose it, but it's also true that we don't know what we've been missing until it arrives."

"Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped. "

"Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. "

"I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar."

"When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car."

"If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?"

"I have opinions of my own -- strong opinions -- but I don't always agree with them." - George Bush

-Updated on June 30/2009-
-"Why so serious?"
-"Do I look like a man with a plan?"
-"It can't rain all the time"
-"Do you know the muffin man?"