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So it's been brought to my attention that the most recent journal entry I've got up here is a rather sad, sad one. So eh, well, these last 2 years have been amazing. I may have lost a friend, but I gained a lover and friend instead. Francisco Javier A. (Pancho for short), I find myself looking out the window every couple of minutes, waiting for him to come home so that I can see him. So, here's some poems and things, that I wrote when we first got together...
Written a few weeks after meeting him... it's called I think I'm in love...
I feel like a frog in a biology class,
like a mouse in a cat shelter,
like that guy who stands outside her window, singing his heart out,
like that girl who cries herself to sleep and tries to forget,
like that father who sees the light in his wife's eyes,When she holds their baby for the first time,
like the little boy who goes to the parade and gets to ride the float,
like the little girl who searches through the garbage and refuse for her next meal,
like the man who sits on the sidewalk begging for change,
like the dog who comes bouncing back every time he kicks him,
like the little boy who kicks the dog, because it's the only thing that will love him no matter how much he hurts it, it's the only thing as dumb as he is, Loving someone who hurts you,
I feel like, I feel like,
I feel like a virgin, laying in wait on the bed for her first time,
like the boyfriend, nervous and scared, cause he doesn't want to hurt her,
like the pastor, who gives his first sermon,
like his wife, looking on, with a proud gleam in her eyes,
like the winner of corny game show,
like the person who thinks, "I could totally win that show",
I feel, I feel,
I feel so confident, like nothing can go wrong,
I feel so invincible, not even Kryptonite can phase me,
I feel so vulnerable, even a mere word can crush me,
I feel so lost, cause I don't where I am,
I feel like, I feel like,
I feel like a kid at Christmas, discovering that their cookies've been eaten by Santa,
like a young hood who spits it out on the school yard, and gains the respect of his peers,
like the shy girl in choir, who belts it out at the audition and knocks em all off of their feet,
like the little girl who watches her cat get hit by a car,
like the one who's driving, and sees the look in the little girl's eyes as he steps out of the car,
I feel, I feel, I feel so lost, I feel so loved, I feel so hated, I feel so jaded, I feel so hurt, I feel so confident, I feel so invincible, I feel...
I feel...
s**t, I think I'm in love...
written after watching Futurama and it's called I think that I'm alive
As the trees burn and the sky darkens,
I think that I'll try to make it through,
Make it through this dream, this semblance of reality,
As the leaves decay and crunch under my sneakered feet,
My senses pervade my sense of reason,
And I'm awake and dreaming once again,
The trees bleed their clear blood, so bitter and hard,
I'm knocking my head against every surface trying to beat myself out of this dream,
It can't be real, this can't be real,
The air begins to chill, so I snuggle closer into my bed,
And I hunker down with a good book in my hands,
And try to escape the lie this reality's become,
It's become so diseased and torn inside my mind, it's beginning to chafe, and rub the skin so raw,
As the blood drips from my ears and stains the pavement,
Making little Rorschach tests, as if Mother Nature herself is trying to question my sanity,
As if in some jest to make me doubt myself again,
And as the trees burn and the sky darkens,
I think that I'll try to make it through,
Make it through this dream, this semblance of reality...
This one was written soon after I met Pancho and it's called Motion without Meaning
Soft whispers slither through the ear canal, fingers trail along the cheek,
And forgetting everything that I promised myself, I let my body sink down into that familiar blanket of comfort,
Just like a lover's warm embrace,
The scent so intoxicating, reeling in my nostrils,
Euphoric in its simplicity, the mere touch of your hand in mine,
Hands around my waist, fingers softly tracing the creases in my sweater,
Some how I hope that this one'll end up better,
Than the rest,
Tell me that I'll be happy again,
Show me that I can deal again,
Show me that I can deal again,
Tell me that I'll be happy again,
Than the rest,
Some how I hope that this one'll end up better,
Hands around my waist, fingers softly tracing the creases in my sweater,
Euphoric in its simplicity, the mere touch of your hand in mine,
The scent so intoxicating, reeling in my nostrils,
Just like a lover's warm embrace,
Soft whispers slither through the ear canal, fingers trail along the cheek,
And forgetting everything that I promised myself, I let my body sink down into that familiar blanket of comfort,
And with my head on your heart, I lose myself in its beat, as it soft whispers, through my ear canal, and your fingers trail along my cheek...
If you'd like to see/read more of my poetry, check me out on AllPoetry.com as TurtleSensei or on Deviant art as TurtleSensei
 Turtle Sensei · Tue Jun 17, 2008 @ 08:59pm · 1 Comments |
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