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Hmmm. I know this comes at a weird time. I just celebrated my fourth Gaia anniversary, and my fifth year of role-playing. It doesn't really come as a surprise lately that I've been seriously considering retiring.
Five years has been a long time. I often think about all the people I've interacted with over my life-span as a role-player. I realize now that many of them have gone their separate ways. Some started off as friends, some never knew each other before sitting down at a computer screen, and now some have fallen in love with one another.
I find myself missing those that I have parted ways with more than ever. Thinking of them makes me remember my past, and how much I've grown because of all the people surrounding me.
My self esteem may suck, but I'm no longer doing the things I used to because of the people I met. I'm still malicious... but I have hope.

When I think about my first Gaia role-play, I often find myself thinking of how badly I sucked, and how badly I would have smacked myself had I first interacted with myself upon joining Gaia.
That makes me smile. Because of all the people that were there to smack me along the way.
I miss the people I role-played with dearly, and I love the ones I role-play with now.
Though, Gaia is a very different environment from what it was back then. I've seen it change so much, that its making me cry looking at this Journal layout. It hasn't changed in four years. Once the Forums were like this- Actually the formatting of the forums was worse.
I think about the new style of role-play that has erupted since the forum revamp. Chatrooms are beautiful, but changing the way Gaians role-play. They grow so fast, and they show the individuality of all the people behind the characters. I don't think I can keep up with that if I tried.

However, now I just seem to be complaining about the past. I'm writing this at a time where school is no longer the cake-walk it used to be. I have less and less time to lurk the forums to find a good role-play. Also, it comes at a time where I haven't left my shell in a long while.
I tried something new- Didn't work out so well. I ended up hurting people I didn't mean to and it all around sucks.
So, maybe its time to call it quits? Maybe its time to retire my late nights of role-playing to something new.
A job. A TV. and a life.
God knows if anything like that will happen in the near future.
No matter what I decide, I just want everyone who reads this to know I'll always love you guys, even if I'm no longer a role-player or I if I am.
Feel free to text me, e-mail me, PM me... Do whatever, you know?

Alright.
~Tiefe Wasser.