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One dis scatters a thousand praises |
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*WARNING, WARNING, EMO CONTENT, CAUTION!!!!!*
I feel awful, and I feel like if I write it out I might feel better. (FLAMERS ONLY GET FLAMED BACK!) Ok, long story, so let's just as I recently recieved a vast amount of praise and admiration and 'we appreciate you!', and one or two 'OMG YOU SUX!' I feel like I've been boosted up and up and then a giant rock came and hit me square in the face and now I'm lying in a heap unable to get up. I don't understand how I can let stupid comments get to me like this, and why that despite how well I'm liked by others it's the miniscule details I tend to notice. I'm being to pessimistic, but I'm trying, I really am TRYING, to be OPTIMISTIC! I wanna cry I wanna curl up in a dark corner and never come out. And whenever I get depressed like this I always start to think of those who have worse hardships than I and it makes me feel even more guilty thinking about what a whiner I am! I just want people to like me! WHY AM I LIKE THIS??!! And I want to be well known and create things people will really appreciate! AM I COMPLETELY NUTS???????!!!!!!!! IF IT TURNS OUT THE SAME AS NOW, I'M GONNA BE PUT DOWN BY ONE CRITIC'S OPINION AND I'LL NEVER BE ABLE TO DO ANYTHING AGAIN!!! WHAT IS MY FLIBBIN' PROBLEM??!! I'M NUTSO! VERY NUTSO! And I'm going to try to get some sleep now and maybe revise this in the morning...
 Aki Ameko · Sun Aug 20, 2006 @ 06:19am · 0 Comments |
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I quit band. I hate marching, I detest my band teacher, and the rest of the band year hasn't been all that fun either. It's my Senior year of high school and there's other classes that I want to take, and I'm going to start taking college classes. Marching band takes up so much of my summer and evening time for something I don't enjoy. None of my close friends are in band either. But I can't help but to feel incredibly guilty. I know I'm going to miss playing my euphonium, although there's still community bands in the summer and TubaChristmas in the winter, and if I get motivated enough I could do a youth band.... (and then there's college bands, etc. etc...) I feel guilty that I'll be letting other people down, and I'm worried about what everyone's going to say. I'm also kind of worried about what kind of wrath my former band teacher is going to give me, but he's easier to avoid. There were some awards I was after that I'd still like to earn, and I've always thought of myself as a big musician, although I'm still going to be in choir. I just feel that band isn't really where I'm going in life, I'm trying to focus more on art and writing, and a little bit of drama. (My fantasy career is doing graphic novels and voice acting (for anime of course!) on the side) But yeah, I feel really guilty and I know everyone's going to be asking me about it. emo
Aki Ameko · Mon Aug 14, 2006 @ 06:54am · 1 Comments |
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Aki's Happy Trip to Chicago! Awesome! |
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Ok, Aki spent three days and two nights in Chicago! I had lots of fun, and now, I will go through the trip in detail for you. mrgreen
Tuesday:
Boat Tour from river in Chicago to Lake Michigan: Exceeded Expectations
Very interesting narration and a fun ride. My favorite story on the trip was about a guy who started living under one of the bridges, and found a way to hook up power. When the police found him, he had a refridgerator, a hot plate, and tv, and an Xbox. xd Another funny story was a guy who was hired to tend to the lighthouse on lake Michigan right by Chicago. They said he could live in it as long as he tended to the light and did maintenence and such. All was going well until he started throwing wild parties there. xd It is now maintained by the city.
Ed Debevics 50's and 'rude' restaurant: Met expectations
Overall I thought it was pretty lame. The food was ok, (large sandwiches and 'home of the world's smallest sundae!') but I thought the waiters were really dumb with how they were supposed to be rude to you. When we walked in a waitress went through our group yelling 'MOVE DORKS!' And at one point they got up on a dividing wall and did a dumb dance. I was told that this was a 'family' rude, and that there are other places that are worse. Still lame.
Chicago White Sox vs. Detroit Tigers baseball game: Exceeded Expectations
Ok, shoot me now... I actually enjoyed it. I had someone explain the rules and what was going on to me, so I was actually able to get into the game. I think I'm now kind of a fan of the Sox... They have a cool logo. (Score was Sox, 4>3)
I also bought a bottled soda, and when they gave it to me they took the cap off and wouldn't give it back. Can anyone tell me why? I thought it was rude a frustrating. Do they not want us throwing the caps at the field or something...?
Wednesday:
Sears Tower, tallest building in U.S.: Met expectations
Ok kids, this is what we call a friggin' tall building. 103 feet. "Hey, I can see my house from here!" er...not. Anyway, the view from the top was really cool, I was able to spot most of the places we were going/had been. When we got there we watched a short movie on the history of how it was made. I thought it was really interesting how they designed the structure of the building. Imagine three square pillars arranged in a three by three square.
+++
+++
+++
As the pillars go up, two of the corners stop.
o++
+++
++o
Up a little ways more, the other two corner pillars stop.
o+=
+++
=+o
Then, three of the pillars around the middle stop.
0*=
++*
=*o
And there you have it, the structure of the Sears Tower. 3nodding (Elevation highest to lowest---.+,*,=,o)
Navy Pear, shopping and food: Met expectations
Ok, it was a big building with some shops and restaurants in it. Didn't find anything interesting in the stores, but I did find a nice and cheap restaurant called the 'Twisted Lizard' that sold good tacos. They were small, but I wasn't that hungry anyway. There was also some rides outside the building, but I didn't get a chance to go on any cause nobody in my group wanted to and we were running out of time. I really wanted to go on the Ferris Wheel. crying
Wicked, the Broadway Musical: Met expectations
VERY COOL. This show has an awesome soundtrack, and the storyline ties in surprisingly well to the original 'Wizard of Oz', though it can be a bit odd and slightly far-fetched at times. Based on a novel, the basic plot is about the Wicked Witch of the West, who we find out is named Elpheba, and how she was friends with the Good Witch of the North, Glinda, when they were in school, and how she later became 'wicked'. I loved how they portrayed Glinda as the epitome of a blonde valley girl, and Elpheba as the brainy ugly duckling with a strong personality. Every now and then they'd throw in a line remeniscent of lines from the original story, and you find out how the Scarecrow, Tin Man, and Lion originated. (Although some may note that the original 'Wizard of Oz' was based on the financial state of the United States at the time. Although, I'm not sure that this is a proven fact, but I've read about it and the evidence seems truthful.) Oh, and how Elpheba's sister, Nessarose, became known as the Wicked Witch of the East. In the end the witch didn't seem wicked at all, she rather seemed like she was trying to help but used the wrong methods and made bad choices to do so. But it still has a happy ending. The special effects were really cool, my favorites were the metal frame 'bubble' that Glinda road around in, and all the lighting in the emerald city and the lighting for Elpheba's magic. I encourage anyone who has the chance to go see this, to do so! Although I'm pretty sure it's closing in Chicago soon, and you have to book tickets really early. (Ours were booked in February. sweatdrop ) And now, until someone makes it into a movie! Which they're BOUND to do, it's way too POPULAR (lol) not to. (*cough* Popular was a song sung by Glinda *cough*)
Water Tower Place, mall: Did NOT meet expectations
Ok, I'm in a mall in Chicago, right? I'm in a big city downtown mall. Here I am expecting to see stores where they might sell anime-related material... OH. MY. GOSH. THEY DIDN'T EVEN HAVE A BOOK STORE!!! It was pretty much all clothing stores... My gosh, these Chicago people must all be fashion crazy people of worldliness!!! ("Yeah, Aki, get a clue!" stare ) *cough* The funnest part about that danged mall was the elevator with glass walls. It was fast and fun. xd Let's ride it again!!! ....What?
Blue Man Group concert: Did NOT meet expectations
Is it just me, or did I have a GREAT misconception on what Blue Man Group was? I thought it was three guys who paint themselves blue and play these weird but cool percussion instruments made out of pipes and stuff. Well, there was a little bit of music. The rest was just WEIRD. They threw gumballs into one blue guy's mouth and he spit the color out onto a canvas board for abstract painting. They jammed another blue guy's mouth full of marshmellows until he spit it out and made a 'sculpture' out of it. They made this one audience member feed them twinkies, and after they had eaten a whole bunch, stuff that was supposed to look like digested twinkies came out of tubes on their shirts into the audience. (I was in the second row, a 'poncho seat', but luckily was not hit.) They shoved a camera with a flashlight down an audience member's throat and the contents of it were displayed on a TV screen. They took ANOTHER audience member backstage, covered him in paint, the lifted him up by his ankles and threw him at a board. When they were done they came back out with a cart with jello on it. After playing with the jello for about a minute, they ripped it apart to reveal his head underneath. Now, some parts of it were actually kinda cool and funny. Each one of them had giant flipcards/posters, and at the beginning they all said 'pick one poster and read only that one'. I picked the one that had statistics about the Chicago Tribune. I heard some others laughing and apparantly some of the others were trying to convince you to read the other poster. There was also a part where there was a scrolling sign that said 'Welcome to the Internet Coffee shop. Where you sit in front of a computer with a big cup of coffee while you talk to people thousands of miles away, but talk to nobody else in the shop.' Those were funny. Stuff from the mouth is not. Music is cool. Freak shows are not. I was very disappointed.
Thursday:
Medievel Times, restaurant and jousting tournament: Exceeded Expectations
Wow, for some reason I didn't think a jousting tournament and eating with your hands would be that exciting. It was AWESOME!! When we got there they gave us a ticket color-coded according to where we were to be seated. Before the show, there were several shops selling fantasy/Medievel merchendise, (*DROOL*) and I bought myself a sun-catcher with a silver crescent moon and a crystal star on it. I later found a necklace that looked almost exactly like it, but the crystal was diamond shaped rather than star shaped. Just as well, I had plans to make it into a necklace anyway... Which I've done already, and it's gorgeous. mrgreen Ha! When the show was about to start, three trumpeters came out and did their little fanfare, then the announcer called people to be seated by their colors. We were seated in the blue section, so, we were wooting for the Blue Knight! Which was absolutely wonderful for me... I thought the Blue Knight was the cutest. Our waiter was cute too, and very funny...  Anyway, our knight lost his first match, but it wasn't really a big deal because I could tell it was choreographed fighting. But it was still good, the knights probably take turns winning. The area was set up like a stadium, and we were in stadium seat, only we had tables in front of us so we could eat and watch at the same time. We had soup, chicken, broccoli, potatoes, cookies, and pepsi. We had to eat it all with our hands, but they provided wet wipes to be sure we were clean. Oh, and about half-way through the tournament, the announcer said the names of the groups in attendence. I chuckled, because I knew what was coming. He got to our school and he was like 'Well, it's a High School...' We all busted up laughing and cheered. The name of my High School is very hard to pronounce. xd Overall, it was lots of fun. The Blue Knight signed the free burger-king style paper hat of mine that everyone was given for me. Lol, hotties. heart xd
Woodfield Mall: Met expectations
THIS MALL had a Hot Topic. There was some pretty neat stuff, but nothing I was really interested in buying. All their anime stuff was mostly Naruto and Full Metal Alchemist, but there was some Inuyasha and other anime here and there. But nothing I was really interested in. They didn't have any Harry Potter either. crying Then later I went into a Claire's, and was astonished that I bought TWO THINGS at Claire's. o.o Some hair chopsticks with kanji on them, and a black flowered hair clip that looks good with my dark hair. At this time, vowing not to spend any more money, (MUST think of AnimeIowa!) I then walked into a gaming store, where I found these leather wristbands with the zodiac signs on them in English and Chinese. And I was like, "OMG, they're astrological AND oriental AT THE SAME TIME!!!!" I had to have a Virgo one, in brown rather than red or green, because it will go with every outfit and brown is an autumn color. (Aki!) ^^ I didn't spend any more after that.
Well, that was my trip to Chicago. COMMENT PLEASE!!! heart
Aki Ameko · Fri Jun 09, 2006 @ 05:10am · 0 Comments |
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Ok, I'm storing some cool quotes here... Mainly just one for now.
I love this quote. My choir director has said this a few times, and I finally saw it framed and on display at our concert this evening. So here it is!
"For the common things of every day
God gave man speech in the common way
For deeper thoughts men think and feel
God gave the poet words to reveal
But for heights and depths that know no reach
God gave man music, the soul's own speech."
Aki Ameko · Wed May 17, 2006 @ 04:23am · 0 Comments |
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I finally got a Coco kitty! Her name is Kabocha, and she's the most wonderful wittle sweetums evaaaa! heart Kabocha means pumpkin in Japanese. Isn't it a cute name?? I call her Kabo-chan for short. (Well actually it has more characters than her actual name...but it sounds cuter than the original) I can't find a position that doesn't cover too much of myself or her up... I finally had to go with the charge position, but I don't like it much and the bow still covers half of it. I wish I could have her down by my feet, I don't have many items down there. *Gripe* Oh well... *Pets and cuddles Kabo-chan* Play, little kitty! Nya! blaugh
Aki Ameko · Fri Dec 23, 2005 @ 12:14am · 0 Comments |
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.hack//SIGN - Social/Online life |
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Yippee! I was finally able to obtain the entire series of .hack//SIGN!
I love this anime so much. I just finished it, it was awesome.  It's just so neat that it takes place on an online RPG, and I really like the scenes where they ask each other about their IRL selves. It's got me thinking a lot about how much I cherish my online relationships. There's a lot of people here on Gaia that I'd like to meet IRL...if only. sad I relate a lot to the character Subaru, though lacking in the physical handicap that drives that character to play the World. I suppose it's a social handicap I have... *shrug* I just communicate so much better in writing. That's probably why I learn a lot more about my friends over MSN messenger and such. I have a few close friends IRL, but everyone else at school... I just feel uncomfortable around them, I suppose. Like I try to talk to them and stuff, but...why can't I comfortably enter a conversation with them?? Do I just feel too different, or as if I can never relate?? It's so frustrating... I would blame my partial homeschooling on this, except that my brothers were homeschooled and they get along with people fine, according to my understanding. My mom says it's because the kids at school don't have the right spirit...but I dunno. I just feel like it's something wrong with ME not them... Argh, and why does Drama club have to be so hard? I try to put expretion in my acting...but I think it's that comfort thing again. One thing I remember my vocal teacher saying once, is that actors have to be very comfortable with their bodies...and I'm...not. I'm not comfortable with other people's bodies either... I hate touching people I don't know very well. For our upcoming vocal concert we're supposed to put our hand on the shoulder of the person in front of us, and I can't even do that! Maybe because the person in front of me is a certain someone that I've had mixed feelings about...>.>... sweatdrop *Gripe, gripe, gripe* I've also thought a lot about how much I'd like to be alone in a fantasy world just like Tsukasa, but in the end I'd still want SOMEONE to be around... The lyrics to the soundtrack really speak for me. I've also had thoughts about being alone in a fantasy world with a...special...someone... But with my looks and shy personality, I highly doubt that will happen any time soon. I don't plan on dating until college anyway...that's at least another year... Well that's my deep pondering thought for today.
In conclusion, I LURVE YOU ALL MY WONDERFUL ONLINE/GAIA BUDDIES!!!! <:3 whee  
Aki Ameko · Fri Dec 16, 2005 @ 10:02pm · 0 Comments |
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SLIDE-SWERVE-SPIN-CRASH-STOP @_@ |
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Yeah...so, two days after I get my license, my mom wrecks the car I was supposed to be driving. We were on our way home from TubaChristmas (teh awesomeness! More on that later...) when the roads were really bad and my mom lost control... Everyone was fine though, but we're pretty sure the car is totalled. We're just very lucky it was a Neon rather than a Semi. xp
Anyway...TubaChristmas! About one of the most awesomeness things of the year... Imagine 'Carol of the Bells' being played by about 80 tubas and euphoiums! It is SO much fun...too bad my experience this year was ruined slightly by the bad conductor, my mom losing her cell phone, (though getting it back!) and the car crash.  on that one.
It has been SO COLD here in Iowa... It was like, -10 degrees all last week. It's better this week, but my paper route isn't much fun in the snow... I'm finally able to go on my paper route alone, but it's pretty lonely without my mom or the CD player that was in my mom's now wrecked car.
My friend and I are going to be singing a duet for 'Dicken's Dinners', several vocal events at our school where we serve as entertainment at private Christmas parties, including serving, Dickens readings, and musical entertainment. So anyway, we're singing 'When Christ Was Born of Mary Free', and my friend is also playing 'Away In a Manger' as a piano solo, and she's accompanying me playing 'Good Christian Men Rejoice' as a euphonium solo. We're not too shabby, but we've room to improve.
I'm sick today, once again. Actually more I was sick last night and decided to skive off school today due to not being done with my homework, mostly. However, I do have regrets as my rehearsal for Drama was today... Oh well, they already know I was 'sick'. 
Gaia-ness! Right now I'm saving up for a Coco plushie...if only someone would buy my November 05 letter! crying I'm also drooling over the new plushies for sale in the Gaia Store... Kiki!!!! heart I want the Mini Wings shirt too, and I would go for a poster except that my room's already full of crap on the walls... I am SO going as a Gaian to AnimeIowa! As well as Sailor Virgo, of course... Oh! And I finally opened a Mini Shop! It's called Avatar Epic, I write short stories about your avatar! I also do haiku, and someone's already bought one of those and she loved it. The link can be found in my sig, please check it out!
Aki Ameko · Tue Dec 13, 2005 @ 11:06pm · 0 Comments |
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Yey! Today I went over downtown and took the driver's test... I did pretty well, even on parallel parking, which surprised me. I think it was because there was no care behind me when I did it... I also lost points on stopping over crosswalks and not signaling soon enough. (I didn't know where the street that the driving instructor indicated was...) And when I came back to the building, I pulled into a space where I should have parallel parked so I had to get out and find another space, in which I forgot to signal both in and out and I was more than 18 in. away from the curb. xp But oh well... Watch out! Aki Ameko's on the streets now! Mwaha! xd
Aki Ameko · Thu Dec 01, 2005 @ 11:02pm · 0 Comments |
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Gaia Re-interest/Sickness/Honor Band/Ballet/GoF |
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Once again we have here a random update and insight on Aki's ever so interesting life. Ha.
After a few months and a couple of death threats from Gaia buddies, my interest in Gaia was re-kindled. What really sucks was that the time period in which I wasn't interested was summer, the time that our family computer is most available. But anyway, I finally started posting again in one of my favorite RPs, and I've got a quest for a G-lol Pink Gown going. I'm loving a lot of the new features here on Gaia, especially Gaia Towns, advanced profiles, and new Guild features. Now I just have to re-kindle my Sailor Moon Guild, but it must be at a time when I feel like it... When it comes down to it, the main reason why I wasn't on Gaia for so long was the constant pressure to post, which made Gaia seem more like a chore rather than leasure time. Which sucks. Oh, and Gaia towns...HA HA HA...let me give you a mouthful about that... First of all, yeah, lots of fun to walk around chatting with people, especially when you throw a huge party in a random house. mrgreen But I couldn't get a house for the longest time, and of course I wanted to reserve, but, HA, no chance there. FINALLY the admins add more homes, so I go ahead and take my chance to reserve me and my friends. I picked the moment when PMs were down. I got NO confirmation e-mail, so I had NO CLUE where my neighborhood was. Well, 1k down the tube. May as well pick out a house anyway...which I'm probably going to end up moving later if I don't like my neighborhood... stare
*cough* I got sick on Tuesday. Sore throat, stuffed up, fever, and very dizzy. And I had an HONOR BAND that day!!! I LURVE honor bands, and I didn't want to miss it! crying I went anyway, after I doped up on Tylonal, anyway... wink I was fine for most of the rest of the day, and I was lucky that the concert was bumped up to 4:00 rather than 7:00, though it was caused by the most evil of things... Dare I say it...? ...SNOW!!!!... eek gonk First...you know...four-letter-word of the year... But anyway, I was out from school for almost the rest of the week...it was nice being able to go home with my mom afterwards...that was nice. ^_^
This evening I went to a ballet of Alice in Wonderland. It was...interesting...but too much dancing. (Ari, don't hit me! eek ) They had some very funny and cute parts, and I loved the costumes. It kind of dragged though... And I still feel like doing graceful ballet movements....weird. eek
Grr. While I was at the ballet, my brother went to see Goblet of Fire. I REALLY want to see it, mostly because it's my favorite HP. He says it was good. And I refuse to know any more. Though, it's ME who's read the book, so he got to ask me some questions about the plot that might not have been explained clearly enough. I get to see it tomorrow... I get to see it tomorrow... I get to see it tomorrow... I get to see it tomorrow... I get to see it tomorrow... *INHALE* eek
Aki Ameko · Sat Nov 19, 2005 @ 04:15am · 2 Comments |
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