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I'm just sitting here watching the wheels go round and round...
Until I get a tablet, or a pen to replace the ($130) Wacom Tablet I lost the pen to like, two months after getting the damn thing, I wanted to practice drawing with the mouse. So, I drew a little picture of me and my kitten being festive:

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done completely and entire by hand with the mouse and I am telling you, sir, after about three hours of that s**t my wrist wanted to kill me in my sleep. I hear it whispering.

And, about five minutes ago, I drew this using the pen tool in Photoshop:

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It's my avatar, even though the only things on it that in any way resemble my avatar are the green sweater and the hair. Everything else either wouldn't fit on the screen, or I was like, "Eff that, too hard."

Anywho, the main reason I want to start artisterizing is because I want to sell that stuff for some Gaian gold. I need it, man. I bought two Fortune Eggs for like, 22k a piece and got fail coins on both so I was pissed as all get-out and now I want to make the money back.

My John Lennon Icons
Because I want a place to put them.

Yes, the animated ones suck.

And yes, I made them all, so if by some gratuitous twist of Internet fate you find yourself upon this journal entry and would like to take one of these for your own, just comment and tell me so.

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It's official, I hate humanity.
Okay, we all know that Steve Irwin died this week. It's been everywhere on the internet, television, etc., and I'm incredibly sad about it, but what I'm most sad about is the response from everyone on the internet, or people in general. They're all suggesting that Steve deserved what he got, and they're saying things like "go stingray!", and I've even heard that someone created an animation congratulating the stingray for 'a job well done'.

Has the majority of humanity become so callous that they can't even look beyond a television persona and see an actual human being? Steve Irwin had family and friends that loved him, and he was a good person that did good things for animals all over the world. I learned more from the show Crocodile Hunter than all my science classes combined. Steve Irwin shared his entire life and his love for conserving nature with everyone around the world. He didn't 'deserve what he got' just because he took a more extreme route for what he did. No good person deserves to die - ever.

Anne Frank said once "Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart." Well, I believe that she was wrong. Humanity is slowly losing its empathy towards others. Within the next generations, I feel that we'll all be a bunch of sociopaths with no care in the world other than anything that affects us directly, plainly, and obviously. There are politicians and celebrities saying we're all becoming more aware of the world around, saying that the awareness of global warming and the lack of natural resources is proof of that.

But maybe we should stop trying to save that two-hundred-year-old tree in the rain forest and start trying to save our souls.

I really don't know why people are so very touchy when it comes to religion. Haven't they realized yet that it's all the same thing? God presents himself (I don't actually believe God is male, but for the sake of my sanity, I'm using that term) in the form that's most convenient to the region he happens to be.. presenting himself in at the time. After all, the Christian God is usually perceived as an old white man, but that sort of thing wouldn't really fly well over in India, now would it? So, God has to relate to his demographic.. He's like a politician, only less smarmy.

There are so many faults when it comes to religion, and most of those faults were made because humans are complete dumb-asses. Humans are faulted by nature. It's our jobs to make as many faults as possible, then blame others for them. And when we find faults in other people, rather than being intelligent and welcoming, we stone them to death. So why the hell are we trusting humans to come up with all the answers to religion and the after life and what's right or wrong?

Humans wrote the Bible and, though they say it's the word of God, how are we supposed to trust them? They lie. A lot. Humans are faulty liars, and we're relying on them to make the rules? I think I see a flaw in that plan. After all, why are you trusting a book that was written thousands of years ago, when women were practically property and people didn't even know that there were other countries beyond their back yards? Would you try to use an instruction manual from twenty-five years ago to fix a new-model refrigerator? No, so why are you trying to use an instruction manual from thousands of years ago to fix your lives?

Furthermore, I'm pretty sure I'm not going to die a fiery death in the pits of Hell for writing all this because I don't believe there's a Hell. People are always trying to find consequences for things so that they appear right simply out of fear, and I don't really think that's how any higher power wants it to go. After all, one can't be punished for believing the wrong thing because there's no definitive proof that what they're believing is really wrong. And, if there really was a single truth when it comes to religion, God would just tell us so. He can do that, you know - he's omnipotent. It'd be a piece of cake for him to just appear to every single human being on this planet and say "____ is right. Do it or else." and, because he hasn't done it, I'm left to assume that he really doesn't mind what we believe.

We're like God's ant farm. It's all fun when we're fighting and working and building and doing our thing, uninterrupted, but it's not all that wise to stick your finger in the middle of the colony.

Le woo!
I got my MP3 player today. It totally rocks- it's got like, an FM radio, a sleek iPod-like display screen (which was the ONLY reason why I liked iPods), and expandable memory. The disks for the expandable memory cost like.. as much as the actual MP3 player, and I don't really need it yet (I've already got about six or seven whole albums, plus a few extra songs and it's barely half full) but it's still cool to have the option. Anywho, it's all wonderful and blue and I can't wait to go somewhere so I can listen to it like one of those cool MP3-player-listening people. Woooo.

I need more stuff to put in my journals. Everyone else has like, avatar art and stuff. I could put some of my five BILLION roleplay characters in here, but I don't feel like it. And I never keep a set name to the personalities - like, Gwen, who was a bitchy, tough orange-haired girl in one roleplay, could be a sweet little brown-haired girl in another. All I really save are the names. I could put those in here.

Gwendolyn (Gwen) Wishart [female]
Aerona Glyn Halifax [female]
Keira Aldaine [female]
Deirdre Connelly [female]
Cailean Gallagher [female]
Mairi Gray [female]
Tara Baine [female]
Kei Sada [female]
Aiden Jones [male]
Kohren E'Trau [male]

Wow. Only two male characters. Do I seem a tad bias to you?

People are dumbasses.
I don't understand the fascination with death and blood. For some reason, people think death is "omg wtf awsum!!1111!1". They all love the color black, they write '666' on everything, and everything has to be 'shadow' or 'darkest_soul_in_the_whole_world_omg_i'm_cool'. The lines between good and evil, right and wrong, have been blurred to the point where pink is evil because it's too 'nice' and black is awesome because it's 'evil'. People boast about killing, weapons, guns, and knives, 'kicking a**' and 'beating the s**t out of someone'. It's great to win a fight but you're a wimp for refusing violence. If someone or something dies at their hands, a teen is numb to the fact that what they just did was wrong. They kick animals, shoot squirrels, hit cats with two-by-fours, just to impress their friends, who are laughing all the while.

They smile when a hearse goes by, followed by the sullen grievers, and don't stop to think that there was once a life in that body in that casket, a life that was loved and loved in return. A soul that felt pain, joy, sorrow, and laughter. That watched the ones around them grow and change to be, hopefully, better people.

Teenagers listen to music that spouts messages of suicide, beating and mutilating women, rape, doing 'anything' for money, and hurting children. People talk of killing like they're discussing Pac-man, of cutting their wrists like it's a fun and dandy hobby. They think about suicide, but not about how it might affect those around them- their friends, their parents, even that distant cousin they hadn't seen in ten years. If you made contact with someone, they will mourn you- don't think otherwise. Don't think that no one cares, because you should care. You should think ahead, past that breakup with your boyfriend or girlfriend, past highschool and all the social pressure of it, into the years where you'll mature, get married, have children, have grandchildren. When you die, your future children die, and thier children die, and so on and so on until the end of time. You're not just killing yourself- you're killing an entire bloodline, hundreds if not thousands of future people that will never exist just because, for a single selfish moment, you thought it was' too much'.

Live for the future, if not for the present.

Julia Dream
Community Member
Julia Dream
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