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Ashley's Journal
I invited my ex Eddie over to watch "Dawn of The Dead" (we were cool now, being friends was cool) About 15 minutes before it ended, he kissed me... I should have pulled away, because he was dating someone else, but instead... I was selfish and kept kissing him stare

When I finally pulled away, and told him we shouldn't be doing this, he said sorry, and we didn't talk for the last 15 minutres. I walked him home, walked back to my place, and felt very confused... Why didn't I pull away? I'm mad at him, but would forgive him in a second... It's odd.

Now, everytime I see him sitting with her being all lovey dovey, I find myself leaving the room, or in most cases (because I'm at my school) I go downstairs.

Ps. Boys suck, throw rocks at them.

Ah... Christmas, the happiest time of year (then why don't I feel happy?). Uhg... last night this little canary we've been taking care of (he was doing quite well acually) got caught and killed by my cat. I know I didn't let her in my room... someone must have been in it. What was really getting on my nerves though (after I cleaned up the mess of feathers...) my mother begun to yell at me saying it was my fault... uhg...

Heh... Eddie (my ex) is dating this girl whom earlier he would always be together with and flirty, but insisted it was but a friendship... Haha... and I'm the bad liar? Uhg... I KNEW there was something going on between them... I just denied any thoughts of him lieing to me... but meh all is good.

Anyways, I'll write back later.

Many things have occured since I've acually read my journal. This guy whom I had a huge crush on, and thought was way out of my league, become my boyfriend, but we broke up. I've made many new friends, and this guy named Colin, whom I think I may have a small crush on (small!).

Eddie (my ex) and I rescently broke up, my dad was against me dating him, so I broke up with him, but he still doesn't seem happy about me. Now I'm regreting it, I find myself thinking of Eddie all the time >_<. What's worst, when I found out I had feelings for Colin, I told a girl named Shandi, and when she was at her friends party, she told other people. Then Eddie called me by cell and told me I'm a f*cking bad liar, and asked why I dumped him for Colin (weird, eh?) we argued for a while, then I hung up on him.

Colin is a druggie (which is one of the reasons I don't like him) but I always find myself smiling like an idiot whenever I see him, or think of him. Whenever I see him angry, I can't help but stress...

Anyways, I'll write back later (and try to write more often, so I don't write as much)

Sunday, October 17

Friday I had my first highschool dance. It was much different than my elementry dances,
First of all, there was very dirty dancing (including two people =P) second, people where making out, and third, guys came out of the dance with nylons on their head (don't ask our school has a bunch of f*cked up people)

Also, this punk guy whom had a mohawk, and the whole punk look (I had a crush on this guy) was making out with a prep. Later, I found out she was his girlfriend (yay?)

My friend Brittany has been obsessed with her ex, and needs to get over him. I don't think she got his hint that he doesn't like her when he said, "Burn in f*cking hell you b*tch"

But ohwell, it's all good.

This guy I don't know also came up behind me and tried to dance dirty with me, but I don't think I was in the mood, because I asked him what the hell he thought he was doing. Unfortunetly, this guy could not think of an intelligent answer, so he left.

That's all I feel like writing today.

Hey there! This is my online journal! I will hopefully be posting daily, or at least weekly, but I am very busy with dance, school etc.

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