Name: Blueiceraptor
Fan Fiction: Reflections of the Past
Author's Note: Alright so I'm not really into the Fai X Kurogane pairing, but it's for an fan fiction contest worth 50k to the winner, so I thought heck why not. I've never written a guy X guy fan fict so please be easy. Takes place around chapter 166 of the manga.
Status: Complete
Relfections Of The Past
Fai stood on the porch of Princess Tomoyo's castle. It was a beautiful castle with a gaint covered wrap around porch. Ever since they had been brought to this world by Princess Tomoyo herself, Fai had fallen in love with the tranquile atmosphere. Right now he stood on the porch, breathing in the fresh crisp air, staring out at the greatly landscaped gradens and listening to the rain.
The rain was pouring from the sky, drowning out everything except Fai's thoughts. It never rained on Celes, always just snow and it's soft touch. Fai used to hate the rain. He hated how it poured down from the clouds with such intensity, just way too loud. Snow floated down from the clouds and you never heard it coming, it was just simply there. Rain soaked you through and through while snow gently carressed your skin. Rain left everything wet and soggy, where snow left everything glistening.
Yep; he used to hate the rain, but not anymore. Now however, after everything he'd been through he kind of liked it. It washed away everything and cleansed the earth. He wished it would wash away his pain and suffering. He no longer had magic, he no longer had a right eye, worst of all he was no longer even human. If he still wasn't recovering from his fight with Ashura he might have stood in the rain, but he was afraid his body was too weak and he'd get sick. After loosing so much he just wanted to let the rain wash him away.
But even loosing all those things didn't hurt as much as almost loosing Kurogane. Everything they had been through together, everything they had scarificed for each other. Fai new the moment he had laid eyes on Kurogane that there was something about him that he liked. Maybe it was how devoted he was to his Princess and his home world. Maybe it was how he seemed to look right through him and see what he was hiding behind his fake smiles. Whatever it was Fai new that he wanted to be with him, although he would have never thought Kurogane would have felt the same. But now he was so confused Kurogane had given up so much and suffered so much just to save him. How could he care about Fai after all of that, on the other hand how could he not after all of that. It was making his head hurt . . . he turned around knowing someone was coming. That was one of the good things about being a vampire, hightened senses. He could smell and feel and hear things far beyond what a regular human could.
Princess Tomoyo approched the young man leaning on her porch railing. He looked deep in thought and sad. "Hey," she said so she wouldn't startle him, though she new his senses were so accute that he already knew she was there. Being a dream seer she had seen a lot of what had happened on their journey. She also knew or could take a good guess on what the man was so deep in thought about. Maybe she could ease his thoughts just a little, at least until Kurogane stopped trying to push his feelings for Fai away. "Fai you know Kurogane needs you. I've known Kurogane for most of his life and I have never seen him like this. I've never seen him once care as deeply for anyone, including me as he does for you," she finished careful not to use the word love. It was better if Kurogane said that word himself to the mage.
Fai waited till Tomoyo left before he relaxed. The rain had finally stopped and he decided he needed to take a walk to clear his head. Fai started off into the huge expanse of gardens that surrounded the castle. Could princess Tomoyo be right, could Kurogane really care for him, wouldn't she know better then anyone? All the questions where making his head hurt even worse. The more he thought about the more he began to hope it was possible, that maybe everything he had lost was worth it in the end. Maybe it was possible, Kurogane had given up a lot for Fai, his blood to keep Fai alive, his arm. Fai stopped on a bridge and leaned against the railing, he looked down into the pond below and watched the long white, gold and black fish swimming by.
Kurogane woke up, he had fallen a sleep in a chair by a fire in Tomoyo's study. Whew he was tired, he was probably still weak from all the blood he had lost. Humm.. he glanced around he was all alone. It felt kind of odd, he hadn't been alone since he got here. Fai had stayed with him, by his side since he got here. He had been in bad shape, he had lost a lot of blood when he had cut off his arm. Tomoyo had told him later that they might have lost him had they not had transported when they did. Kurogane started to get up his new cyber arm feeling odd when he moved it.
"Kurogane, you are still recovering take it easy," Tomoyo said walking into the room.
"I'm fine, where's Fai?" He said more angry then he ment too.
"Last time I saw him he was walking toward the gardens," Tomoyo answered as she watched Kurogane start toward the door. "Don't you think it's time you admitted your feelings about him and told him that you love him," she said giving him a push in the right direction.
"Humph," Kurogane muttered as he shut the door behind him and headed outside. That women she's got a lot of never, he thought as he walked toward the gardens. Me in love with that mage, he shivered at the thought. I mean I did give him my blood so he wouldn't die even though I knew it would mean me being his bait from now on. Then just know I gave up my arm so I wouldn't loose him. Loose him. . . what would I do if I lost him, I almost did twice. Could I live without him? These thoughts annoyed Kurogane even more, so what was he doing going after Fai.
Kurogane walked through the gardens until he found Fai looking over the rail down at the koi in the pond. He didn't say anything just walked up and stood beside him staring down at his reflection in the pond. Boy he thought they both looked rough. Him with his metal arm, Fai's gold eye and bandaged right eye, they looked like they had been through hell and back. In a way he guessed they had. Neither one of them spoke, they just stood in silence, each deep in there own thoughts.
"You know it's kind of funny," Fai broke the slience. Fai had been thinking about what to say to lead Kurogane down the conversation that he wanted. "I've lost everything, my eye, my magic, my humanity, Ashura, my home world and yet some how I don't feel that sad," he finished, never looking up from the pond.
Kurogane glanced at him through the corner of his eye. He needs me he thought, and I'm not going to let him go through this alone, not this time. Kurogane turned and leaned his back against the rail so he wouldn't have to see Fai's reaction to what he was about to say. He was afraid if he say Fai's face that he would do something he would probably regret later. "You don't feel sad because you haven't lost everything. . . I'm still here." Kurogane stated.
Fai felt the emotions he had been bottling up rise to the surface. He tried to supress them but this time it didn't work. How could Kurogane still be here after everything, if it was Ashura he would have left, Fai knew it.
Not getting a reaction from Fai, Kurogane turned around to find Fai crying. "Hey what did I say," Kurogane asked.
Fai whipped around and grabbed two fistfuls of Kurogane's shirt before hiding his face against Kurogane's chest. "How can you say that after all I've put you through," Fai sobbed. "Because of me you lost your freedom, we have to be stuck together for both of us to live, you lost your arm all just for me," Fai sobbed even louder. "Ashura would have never given up so much so why do you?".
"Shut up," Kurogane said, moving his arms around Fai's waist and holding him closer. "Ashura wouldn't have done this because he never loved you. My freedom, my arm it means nothing. I would have rather died then have lived my life without you," Kurogane said finally taking Tomoyo's advice and letting his true feelings out. He felt like a huge weight had been lefted from him, and he liked the feeling.
Fai stopped crying and moved his arms to around Kurogane's neck. Keeping his head on Kurogane's chest he looked up at him, and smiled. "Thank you Kurogane, for not pushing me away. I love you too," Fai said tears of joy now running down his checks.
Kurogane decided then and there that there was nothing he was going to hide anymore. That as long as Fai was here with him that he would be ok. And that he wouldn't regret what he was about to do, like he might have in the past. Not caring if they were alone or not Kurogane bent down toward's Fai, until there lips were touching.
Fai let out a startled gasp before he leaned into Kurogane's kiss and kissed him back. "No more thinking about the past," Fai said as he walked back toward the castle holding Kurogane's hand, "Let's just think about the future, deal."
"Deal," Kurogane said not letting go of Fai's hand even after they had entered the castle.
The end. I know It probably sucks you can tell me I don't care.
