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well. . .
my aunts wake is tomorrow...
I don't know if I'm ready for it. . .
when I see the little kids cry. . .
It will break my heart. . .
and I will cry, too. . .
when I see those little kids. . .
see the holes in their hearts. . .
It will hurt so bad. . .
Then. . .
I will imagine what it feels like. . .
To be in their shoes. . .
To have to live the rest of their lives. . .
without their mommy. . .
Then I will start crying again. . .
To remember all the good times. . .
and the bad ones, too. . .
and think. . .
there will be no more. . .
only memories. . .
memories of the one they loved. . .
but they say memories are priceless. . .
and you must cherish them. . .
but for those kids. . .
They will be in so much pain. . .
not growing up with a mommy. . .
to see the tears in their eyes. . .
to see the emptyness in their eyes. . .
to see the holes in their hearts. . .
the holes that their mommy filled once, not too long ago. . .
but now that she is gone. . .
the holes are here. . .
bigger than ever. . .
It will be so hard to imagine their pain. . .
To imagine. . .
not having a mommy. . .
but its hard on us, too. . .
to lose an aunt. . .
to lose a sister. . .
to lose a wife. . .
to lose a daughter. . .
to lose one of the people we love. . .
It leaves a hole. . .
a hole just like the childrens'. . .
but not as deep. . .
or as big. . .
but a hole is a hole. . .
it still leaves a pain. . .
a pain. . .
that is not curable. . .
a pain. . .
that only hurts less over time. . .
but the pain is still there. . .
and it will always be there. . .
until you pass on. . .
and see that person again. . .
then. . .
only then. . .
will that pain go away. . .
but a new pain will come. . .
missing all the people you left behind. . .
. . .
~Cory emo