also think of a pet arangutang wene u read this
I will now show everyone the correct way to spank their monkey
1. BE REASONABLE
First off, keep in mind that spanking the monkey should always be your last resort. Why? Not only are monkeys intelligent, feeling, downright adorable creatures who make excellent butlers; they?re also much stronger than you and are known to hold grudges. So if you catch Mr. Teeny rearranging your figurine collection, simply scold him in a stern voice and threaten to stop making his favorite banana daiquiris. If the bad behavior continues, however, you?ll simply have no choice but to manhandle your monkey.
2. BE VIGILANT
A spanked monkey tends never to trust the spanker again. To avoid this problem, be as gentle as possible. ?Approach the monkey in a nonconfrontational manner,? advises a primate supervisor at a major U.S. zoo who, for some reason, asked to remain anonymous. Avoid making eye contact, since it could make you appear threatening and expose your peepers to the monkey. (They tend to throw things, like s**t, when agitated.) Angry monkeys also scream loudly; if that occurs, keep your hands the hell off your monkey
3. BE AGGRESSIVE
When your monkey lets its guard down?a monkey will demonstrate submissiveness and calm by turning its back to you?be ready to strike. However, don?t sneak up on your monkey, since the terrible surprise of the spanking will only make it fear and resent you forever. Instead, calmly approach your monkey, then pick it up in your hands?don?t grab too tightly?and hold it in your lap. Dust off your spankin? paddle, crack your knuckles, and prepare to teach your monkey a lesson it won?t soon forget.
4. BE MERCIFUL
Repeatedly whack your naughty monkey?it?ll hurt you more than it?ll hurt Cheetah?till the monkey clearly understands that it?s being dominated. A spanked monkey will typically cower in fear, so you may have to wait awhile?anywhere from 10 minutes to an hour, depending on its age?for your monkey to spring to life again.
you now all know the correct way to spank your monkey
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