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Dunno where I pulled that from...
But, I've got a lot going on this spring, like, crazy busy...
at least for me, it'll be, literally, three times worst this time next year.
I've got two AP exams...
Took the SAT again today...
There's Chalk Festival...
Finals Week is lurking around out there...
It's my Junior year, I [kinda] chose it to be this way... so I won't... whine...
Or I'll TRY not to xD
But... there's something else...
A friend of mine.
Yeah, you could've guessed; him.
The one that seems to cause me a lot of second thoughts, etc
There's something I desperately need to tell him.
But... I can't.
I know the consequences of not doing it.
Can't have that either.
Well, I could leave this up to him...
But what kind of friend would I be if... errrr ...not knowing how to describe it...
But, not good.
Then again, I don't really know if he's my friend at all.
He's changed so much. Not a bad thing, unless he thinks it is at least.
But, he's not at all the same. But, that wouldn't be so bad, the only thing is... I haven't gotten to know him again.
That's a weird sentiment, but, it's pretty much the deal.
The problem is, he won't talk to me.
Now, I'm as much to blame, I won't double click his screen name any more than he will mine.
Though, lately, he's been online... but every time I try and talk to him...
He's leaves:
"Food time," "Gotta make a call," etc...
He just doesn't want to talk to me.
I think...
I could be wrong.
I probably am -- that seems to be happening a lot lately.
I'm so afraid of rejection that I won't start conversations anymore.
Let him start one?
Tried it.
That will NEVER happen. Period.
But, I rant.
This is more about what I just read.
He said that everything good and bad that has happened to him is all for the better.
Even the outcome of hurting people close to him.
Is that... bad?
I don't quite know.
I don't think I'm one of them...
But, still.
"It's okay I hurt you, after all, look how I turned out!"
Does that strike anyone (who chooses to read this) as... not... eh...
I don't know.
Can I trust someone that forgives himself for no good reason?
"I'm sorry I told everyone, but, it made me a who I am."
I'd KILL him.
Can I tell him after all?
I don't know!
Still figuring the whole thing out... Damn... too much lately!