Before, I used to pretend I was loved. I would lie awake at night and hug myself, pretending it was the one who would do the same. For a long time, I was pretending. Wishing and hopping just once that I could have just one embrace.
When I met you, you gave me what I wanted. But why is it that I seem to feel more lonely than before when you are gone.
It's because...I finally realized. I wasen't pretending. I was just filling your spot until I found you. Yet once I did, and I was left alone for even a short amount of time, it felt like I couldn't fill your void any longer on my own. I feel more empty because I know now what to be loved feels like. To truely be embraced. Because I don't want to have to pretend.
I have you. I have no need too.
So. I wont hug myself anymore. I wont pretend to love myself. Because I have you for that. That is why I will wait everytime you leave. Because I know you will be back for me.
To remind me I am loved.
That I don't need to pretend.
Because you are as real as they come.
I guess that is the effect of love. <3
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