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1) "All I have in this world is my word, and my balls, and I dont break em for no one." (Scarface,1983)

2) "In this country you don't add inches to your d**k." (The Departed,2006)

3) "Say hello to my little friend!" (Scarface,1983)

4) "Every dog has its day." (Scarface,1983)

5) "I'm going to make him an offer he can't refuse." (The Godfather,1972)

6) "May the Force be with you." (Star Wars,1977)

7) "A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti." (Silence Of The Lambs,1991)

cool "Bond. James Bond." (Dr.No,1962)

9) "I'll be back." (The Terminator,1984)

10) "It's alive! It's alive!" (Frankenstein,1931)

11) "Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer." (The Godfather razz art II,1974)

12) "Here's Johnny!" (The Shining,1980)

13) "Hasta la vista, baby." (Terminator 2: Judgment Day,1991)

14) "Yo, Adrian!" (Rocky,1976)

15) "Oh, no, it wasn't the airplanes. It was Beauty killed the Beast." (King Kong,1933)

16) "I give you KONG!!! The Eight Wonder Of The World!!!" (King Kong,2005)

17) "A martini. Shaken, not stirred." (Goldfinger,1964)

1 cool "I'm king of the world!" (Titanic,1997)

19) "Teen #2: Is that a ******** Bible? Jay: Hey hey, the HOLY ******** Bible, son." (Clerks II,2006)

20) "Jay: [dancing to "Goodbye, Horses"] Would you ******** me?... I'd ******** me... I'd ******** me hard..." (Clerks II,2006)

21) "Frank Costello: Who let this IRA ******** in my bar?
[the man looks startled] Frank Costello: [laughs] Only kidding. How's your mother? Man in Costello's Bar: Oh... I'm afraid she's on her way out. Frank Costello: [walks away] We all are. Act accordingly. [smiles and his straightens tie]" (The Departed,2006)

22) "Frank Costello: Have a seat, Bill.
[Costigan sits down at Costello's dinner table]
Frank Costello: [while eating crab] Do you know John Lennon?
Billy Costigan: Yeah, sure, he was the president before Lincoln.
Frank Costello: Lennon said, "I'm an artist. You give me a ******** tuba, I'll get you something out of it."
Billy Costigan: [sarcastically] Well I tell you Mr. Costello, I'd like to squeeze some ******** money out of it.
Frank Costello: Smart mouth. Too bad. If you'll indulge me...
[sees Gwen leaving]
Frank Costello: Now what?
Gwen: Choir practice.
Frank Costello: [annoyed] Choir practice.
[Costello pulls out a severed human hand]
Frank Costello: The point I'm making with John Lennon is - a man could look at anything, and make something out of it. For instance, I look at you and I think "what could I use you for?" (The Departed,2006)

23) "Frank Costello: Arm.
Billy Costigan: Arm? What ********' arm?
Mr. French: [French pulls Costigan to a pool table] Show me your arm. Flip it. mmhmmm, mmhmmm...
[French slams Costigan's arm on the table until the cast breaks, while Costigan screams in pain]
Frank Costello: It makes me curious to see you in this neighborhood. And if I can slander my own environment, it makes me sad. This, uh, regression. Plus, I don't know if it's beyond some ******** cop p***k like Queenan to pull you out of the Staties and send you gift-wrapped to me. I just can't know. I wonder what they do in that particular department, anyway.
[Costello slams on Costigan's broken arm with Costigan's boot]
Frank Costello: [yelling] Are you still a cop?
Billy Costigan: [in severe pain] No!
[Costello whacks his arm again]
Frank Costello: [yelling] Swear on your mother's grave you're still not a cop?
Billy Costigan: [painfully] I'm not a ******** cop!
[Costello whacks his arm again, this time re-breaking it]
Frank Costello: [yelling] Are you going to stop doing coke deals with your jerk-off ******** cousin?
Billy Costigan: [weakly] Yes, yes, yes!
Frank Costello: Alright, alright. You're okay, you'll be alright. Get your hand taken care of.
[Costello throws down some money]
Frank Costello: I'm sorry, but it was necessary. As for our problem with Providence - let's not cry over some spilled guineas." (The Departed,2006)

24) "Mr. White: Hardy ********' har." (Reservoir Dogs,1992)

25) "Frank Costello: Good day, father.
Older Priest: Good day, Francis.
Frank Costello: You recall our chat? Little boys. Sucking on their peckers, etc... and so forth. I am as God made me. Is that your rationale? May I remind you - in this archdiocese, God don't run the bingo.
Young Priest: May I remind you - that pride comes before the fall.
Frank Costello: How's Sister Mary Teresa doing? Had a tasty relationship before she took her vows.
[Costello hands the priests a nude drawing of the nun]
Frank Costello: Enjoy your clams, cocksuckers." (The Departed,2006)

26) "[upon learning the Police have found Delahunt's body and that he was a cop]
Fitzy: I don't believe it.
Mr. French: What can't you believe?
Fitzy: I spent all ******** night dragging the poor b*****d in there. Tell me how they find him so fast? Somebody walking a ******** dog ? What ******** size a dog is that? Has to be a big ******** dog, man. I spent all night doing it man.
[pause, Frank stares at him]
Fitzy: I'm embarrassed. I still don't believe he was a cop, I don't believe it.
Frank Costello: The COPS... are saying he's a cop... so I won't look for the cop. Are you soft, Fitz? When I tell you... to dump a body in the marsh, you dump him *IN* the marsh. Not where some guy from John Hancock goes every Thursday, TO GET A ******** b*****b!
[Fitzy laughs, Frank hits him with his cap]
Frank Costello: Don't laugh! This ain't Reality TV!" (The Departed,2006)

27) "When you get the money, you get the power when you get the power you get the women." (Scarface,1983)

2 cool "I've had it with all these ******** snakes on this ******** plane." (Snakes On A Plane,2006)

29) "Shall we shag now, or shall we shag later? How do you like to do it? Do you like to wash up first? You know, top and tails... whore's bath? Personally, before I'm on the job, I like to give my undercarriage a bit of a 'how's your father'!" (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

30) "Scott Evil: It's no hassle...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: But...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: I'm...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: All I'm say...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: There gonna get a...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: I'm...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: I'm just...
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: Would...
Dr. Evil: Sh!... Knock-knock.
Scott Evil: Who's there?
Dr. Evil: Sh!
Scott Evil: But...
Dr. Evil: Let me tell you a little story about a man named Sh! Sh! even before you start. That was a pre-emptive "sh!" Now, I have a whole bag of "sh!" with your name on it." (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

31) "Vanessa Kensington: Mr. Powers, I would never have sex with you, ever! If you were the last man on earth and I was the last woman on earth, and the future of the human race depended on our having sex, simply for procreation, I still would not have sex with you.
Austin Powers: What's your point, Vanessa?" (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

32) "I'm gonna get you Austin Powers! It's fricken freezing in here Mr. Bigglesworth." (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

33) "Quartermaster Clerk: One Swedish-made p***s enlarger.
Austin Powers: [to Vanessa] That's not mine.
Quartermaster Clerk: One credit card receipt for Swedish-made p***s enlarger signed by Austin Powers.
Austin Powers: I'm telling ya baby, that's not mine.
Quartermaster Clerk: One warranty card for Swedish-made p***s enlarger pump, filled out by Austin Powers.
Austin Powers: I don't even know what this is! This sort of thing ain't my bag, baby.
Quartermaster Clerk: One book, "Swedish-made p***s Enlargers And Me: This Sort of Thing Is My Bag Baby", by Austin Powers." (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

34) "Dr. Evil: Gentlemen, I have a plan. It's called blackmail. The Royal Family of Britain are the wealthiest landowners in the world. Either the Royal Family pays us an exorbitant amount of money, or we make it seen that Prince Charles has had an affair outside of marriage and therefore would have to divorce!
Number Two: Prince Charles *did* have an affair. He admitted it, and they are now divorced.
Dr. Evil: Right, people you have to tell me these things, okay? I've been frozen for thirty years, okay? Throw me a frickin' bone here! I'm the boss! Need the info.
[pause]
Dr. Evil: Okay no problem. Here's my second plan. Back in the 60's, I had a weather changing machine that was, in essence, a sophisticated heat beam which we called a "laser." Using these "lasers," we punch a hole in the protective layer around the Earth, which we scientists call the "Ozone Layer." Slowly but surely, ultraviolet rays would pour in, increasing the risk of skin cancer. That is unless the world pays us a hefty ransom.
Number Two: [pause] That also already has happened.
Dr. Evil: s**t. Oh hell, let's just do what we always do. Hijack some nuclear weapons and hold the world hostage. Yeah? Good! Gentlemen, it has come to my attention that a breakaway Russian Republic called Kreplachistan will be transferring a nuclear warhead to the United Nations in a few days. Here's the plan. We get the warhead and we hold the world ransom for... ONE MILLION DOLLARS!
Number Two: Don't you think we should ask for *more* than a million dollars? A million dollars isn't exactly a lot of money these days. Virtucon alone makes over 9 billion dollars a year!
Dr. Evil: Really? That's a lot of money.
[pause]
Dr. Evil: Okay then, we hold the world ransom for...
Dr. Evil: One... Hundred... BILLION DOLLARS!" (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

35) "Allow myself to introduce... myself!" (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

36) "Do I make you horny? Randy? Do I make you horny, baby, yeah, do I?" (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

37) "Casino Dealer: 17.
Number Two: Hit me.
Casino Dealer: You have 17, sir.
Number Two: I like to live dangerously.
Casino Dealer: [Hit for four] :21. Very good, sir.
[to Austin]
Casino Dealer: :5.
Austin Powers: I'll stay.
Casino Dealer: I suggest you hit, sir.
Austin Powers: I also like to live dangerously.
Casino Dealer: 20 beat your 5 sir. I'm sorry, sir.
Austin Powers: Well I must admit, cards aren't my bag, baby." (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

3 cool "Scott: [both are the Jerry Springer show] How could you do this to me? On national television!
Dr. Evil: Well throw me a freakin' bone here, Scott.
Scott: Why did you run out on me?
Dr. Evil: Because you're not quite evil enough.
[audience boos]
Dr. Evil: Well it's true! It's true! You're semi-evil. You're quasi-evil. You're the margarine of evil. You're the Diet Coke of evil. Just one calorie, not evil enough." (Austin Powers:International Man Of Mystery,1997)

39) "If he dies,he dies." (Rocky IV,1985)

40) "I must break you." (Rocky IV,1985)

41) "[after being shot]
Mask: Hold me closer, Ed, it's getting dark. Tell Auntie Em to let Old Yeller out,
[cough cough]
Mask: tell Tiny Tim I won't be coming home this Christmas, tell Scarlett I do give a damn...
[he dies, the Peanut Gallery appears and applauds while The Mask is handed an acting award]
Mask: Thank you, you love me, you really love me!" (The Mask,1994)

42) [standing in front of a mirror, in the process of going out to a club] "It's party time. P, A, R, T. Why? Because I gotta!" (The Mak,1994)

43) "Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: Ipkiss! Police! Freeze!
[the Mask freezes in mid-air]
Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: Put your hands up.
The Mask: [his teeth are frozen together] But you told me to freeze!
Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: All right, all right. Un-freeze.
[the Mask un-freezes and falls to the ground]
Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: You’re under arrest.
[pulls out his cuffs]
The Mask: No! It wasn't me! It was the One-Armed Man!
[regular voice]
The Mask: All right, I confess! I did it, ya hear? And I'm glad! GLAD, I TELL YA!
[gets down on his knees and puts his hands up together]
The Mask: What are they gonna do to me, Sarg.? WHAT ARE THEY GONNA DO?
Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: [puts the cuffs on The Mask's wrists] Sorry, son. That's not my department. Search him.
The Mask: [the cops bring The Mask to his feet] Ow! Where's a cam-corder when you need one?
[snorts in laughter]" (The Mask,1994)

44) "SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSMOKIN'!" (The Mask,1994)

45) "Doyle: [going through Mask's pocket] Picture of Kellaway's wife.
Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: What?
Mask: Uh-oh.
Lieutenant Mitch Kellaway: Margaret! You son-of-a-b***h!
Mask: Geez I thought you would have a sense of humor. After all - you married her!" (The Mask,1994)

46) "Bobby: Uh, are you on the list?
The Mask: Noooo. But I believe my friends are. Perhaps you know them.
[He takes fistfuls of high denomination cash out of his pocket]
The Mask: Franklin, Grant, and... Jackson?" (The Mask,1994)

47) "[the mask pulls out his guns]
The Mask: [in Clint Eastwood voice] You gotta ask yourself one question. "Do I feel lucky?" Well, do ya? Punks!" (The Mask,1994)

4 cool "Mickey: Turn left? Turn left to what you stupid b***h?
Mallory: You stupid b***h? You stupid b***h? You stupid b***h? Mickey, that's what my father used to call me! I thought you'd be a little more creative than that!" (Natural Born Killers,1994)

49) "Mickey: It's just murder. All God's creatures do it. You look in the forests and you see species killing other species, our species killing all species including the forests, and we just call it industry, not murder." (Natural Born Killers,1994)

50) "Mickey: Of course the only thing that kills the demon... is love." (Natural Born Killers,1994)

51) "And shepherds we shall be,
For Thee, my Lord, for Thee.
Power hath descended forth from Thy hand,
That our feet may swiftly carry out Thy command.
So we shall flow a river forth to Thee
And teeming with souls shall it ever be.
In Nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritūs Sancti." (The Boondock Saints,1999)

52) "Connor: [picking out weapons and gear] Do ya know what we need, man? Some rope.
Murphy: Absolutely. What are ya, insane?
Connor: No I ain't. Charlie Bronson's always got rope.
Murphy: What?
Connor: Yeah. He's got a lot of rope strapped around him in the movies, and they always end up using it.
Murphy: You've lost it, haven't ya?
Connor: No, I'm serious.
Murphy: Me too. That's stupid. Name one thing you gonna need a rope for.
Connor: You don't ********' know what you're gonna need it for. They just always need it.
Murphy: What's this 'they' s**t? This isn't a movie.
Connor: Oh, right.
[picks up large knife out of Murphy's bag]
Connor: Is that right, Rambo?
Murphy: All right. Get your stupid ********' rope.
Connor: I'll get my stupid rope. I'll get it. There's a rope right there." (The Boondock Saints,1999)

53) "[the two brothers are in an airshaft and getting a bit uncomfortable]
Murphy: Where the ******** are you going?
Connor: Shhh. I ******** hearin' some s**t out here.
Murphy: Ahh, ******** you! I'm sweatin' my a** off draggin' your ********' rope around. Must weigh thirty pounds.
Connor: Shhh. We are doing some serious s**t here, now get a ******** hold of yourself!
Murphy: Oh, ********* you*! I'm not the rope-totin' Charlie Bronson wannabe that's getting us ******** lost!
Connor: Would you ******** shut it?
[taps him on the head with his flash light, and both brothers start fighting in the air vent until it gives way]
Connor: You mother- Jesus ******** Christ!
Murphy: Oh, s**t!
[the vents give way]" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

54) "Connor: Now you will receive us.
Murphy: We do not ask for your poor, or your hungry.
Connor: We do not want your tired and sick.
Murphy: It is your corrupt we claim.
Connor: It is your evil that will be sought by us.
Murphy: With every breath we shall hunt them down.
Connor: Each day, we will spill their blood till it rains down from the skies.
Murphy: Do not kill, do not rape, do not steal, these are principles which every man of every faith can embrace.
Connor: These are not polite suggestions, these are codes of behavior and those of you that ignore them will pay the dearest cost.
Murphy: There are varying degrees of evil, we urge you lesser forms of filth not to push the bounds and cross over, into true corruption, into our domain.
Connor: For if you do, one day you will look behind you and you will see we three. And on that day, you will reap it.
Murphy: And we will send you to whatever god you wish.
[Murphy and Conner join II Duce behind Yakavetta]
Connor, Murphy, Il Duce: And shepherds we shall be, for Thee, my Lord, for Thee. Power hath descended forth from Thy hand, that our feet may swiftly carry out Thy command. So we shall flow a river forth to Thee, and teeming with souls shall it ever be.
Il Duce: In nomine Patri.
Connor: Et Fili.
Murphy: Spiritus Sancti.
[they execute Yakavetta]" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

55) "Yakavetta: I'm having a shitty day. I'm depressed. Tell me a funny joke.
Rocco: Now? A joke? Uh... um, uh... A joke. Yeah, alright. Um... There's these, uh, three guys, uh... a-a-a-a s**c, a-a-a-a white guy and a black guy.
Yakavetta: ******.
Rocco: Yeah, n-n- Yeah. And-and they walk along the beach, they see this pot, they rub it, genie comes out. Genie says, you know, "You wish for anything you want." So, he asks, uh-uh, Mexican what-what he wants, and he goes, uh, uh, "I want, uh, all my people in America to be happy and free and in Mexico." And so, genie - Poof! And, all the spics are in Mexico. And then he asks the black guy-
Vincenzo Lipazzi: ******.
Rocco: Yeah, that's what I said. Goes to the, uh- uh, ******, says, uh, "What do you want?" And he goes, um, uh, "I want all my African- my ****** brothers in America to be back in Africa and-and happy and everything." You know? So, genie goes poof! And, um, all the niggers in America are in Africa. And, uh, uh, uh, this is go- I'm not funny today. I-I know. I'm havin' a hard day. I-I-I- This joke sucks. It's-it's-it's a stupid joke.
Yakavetta: Continue the joke.
Rocco: So the genie says to the white guy, uh, um, "What's you're one wish?" And the white guy goes, "You mean to tell me all the niggers and spics are out of America?" Genie goes, "Yeah." He says, "Well, um, I'll have a Coke, then."" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

56) "Rocco: They can suck my pathetic little d**k, and I'll dip my nuts in marinara sauce just so the fat bastards can get a taste of home while they're at it." (The Boondock Saints,1999)

57) "Rocco: ********'- What the ********'. ********. Who the ******** ******** this ********... How did you two ******** ********...
[shouts]
Rocco: ********!
Connor: Well, that certainly illustrates the diversity of the word." (The Boondock Saints,1999)

5 cool "[after Smecker gets a phone call in bed with his gay lover and slaps him]
Paul Smecker: What are you doing?
Hojo: I just wanted to cuddle.
Paul Smecker: Cuddle? What a f**."

59) "Connor: Okay, Roc...
[Connor looks at him and laughs; his mask is badly put on]
Rocco: What? You guys got masks.
Murphy: You look like Mush Mouth from Fat Albert.
[as they keep giggling, Rocco takes his mask off]
Rocco: Fine! ******** it. When we're done, she can ID me. I don't care. Just trying to be professional, but nooooo...
Connor: It looks fine!
Rocco: ******** it.
Connor: Now shut the ******** up, you look good. Put it on! You look ********' scary, man!
[Rocco puts his mask on, again badly]
Connor: [trying not to laugh] Now Roc, are you sure that you're obee-kay-bee?" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

60) "[to a trio of Russian mobsters]
Rocco: Hey, Boris. What would you do if I told you your pinko Commie mother sucked so much d**k, her face looks like an egg?
[Checkov decks Rocco]" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

61) "Detective Duffy: This was their target, the f**-man.
Paul Smecker: The what-man?
[awkward pause]
Detective Duffy: The fat man.
Paul Smecker: Well. Freud was right" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

62) "Donna: You killed my... my...
Rocco: Your what?
Donna: My...
Rocco: Your ********' what? Huh? You’re what, b***h?
[puts gun to his head]
Rocco: I'll shoot myself in the head, you can tell me that cat's name! Go ahead! Your what? Your precious, little...
Donna: Skippy! Skippy!
Rocco: Oh, Jesus! What color was it, b***h?" (The Boondock Saints,1999)

63) " PUMPKIN
(yelling to all)
Everybody be cool this is a
robbery!

HONEY BUNNY
Any of you ********' pricks move and
I'll execute every one of you
********! Got that?
(Pulp Fiction,1994)

64) "JULES
There's a passage I got memorized,
seems appropriate for this
situation: Ezekiel 25:17. "The path
of the righteous man is beset on
all sides by the inequities of the
selfish and the tyranny of evil
men. Blessed is he who, in the
name of charity and good will,
shepherds the weak through the
valley of darkness, for he is truly
his brother's keeper and the finder
of lost children. And I will
strike down upon thee with great
vengeance and furious anger those
who attempt to poison and destroy
my brothers. And you will know my
name is the Lord when I lay my
vengeance upon you."
(Pulp Fiction,1994)

more of my favorite movie quotes:
1) Maximus: [after swiftly dispatching another gladiator] Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?
Crowd: Spaniard, Spaniard, Spaniard... (Gladiator, 2000)

2) Graham Hess: Swing away Merrill. Merrill... swing away. (Signs,2002)

3) Richard Vernon: You're not fooling anyone, Bender. The next screw that falls out will be you.
Bender: Eat my shorts.
Richard Vernon: What was that?
Bender: Eat... My... Shorts.
Richard Vernon: You just bought yourself another Saturday.
Bender: Ooh, I'm crushed.
Richard Vernon: You just bought one more.
Bender: Well I'm free the Saturday after that. Beyond that, I'm going to have to check my calendar.
Richard Vernon: Good, cause it's going to be filled. We'll keep going. You want another one? Just say the word say it. Instead of going to prison you'll come here. Are you through?
Bender: No. (The Breakfast Club,1985)

4) Brian Johnson: Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it was we did wrong. But we think you're crazy to make an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us... In the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain...
Andrew Clark: ...and an athlete...
Allison Reynolds: ...and a basket case...
Claire Standish: ...a princess...
John Bender: ...and a criminal...
Brian Johnson: Does that answer your question?... Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club. (The Breakfast Club,1985)

5) John Bender: So... So, are you guys boyfriend/girlfriend? Steady Dates? Lov-ers? Come on, Sporto, level with me. Do you slip her the hot beef injection?
Claire Standish: GO TO HELL.
Andrew Clark: ENOUGH.
Richard Vernon: Hey. What's going on in there?
[whispering]
Richard Vernon: Damn pricks. (The Breakfast Club,1985)

6) John Bender: Don't you ever talk about my friends. You don't know any of my friends. You don't look at any of my friends. And you certainly wouldn't condescend to speak to any of my friends. So you just stick to the things you know: shopping, nail polish, your father's BMW, and your poor, rich drunk mother in the Caribbean.
Claire Standish: SHUT UP.
John Bender: And as far as being concerned about what's gonna happen when you and I walk down the hallways of school together, you can forget it cuz it's never gonna happen. Just bury your head in the sand and wait for your ******** prom. (The Breakfast Club,1985)

7) John Bender: Uh, d**k? Excuse me; Rich. Will milk be made available to us?
Andrew Clark: We're extremely thirsty, sir.
Claire Standish: I have a really low tolerance for dehydration.
Andrew Clark: I've seen her dehydrate, sir. It's pretty gross. (The Breakfast Club,1985)

cool John Bender: Stupid, worthless, no good, goddamn, freeloading son of a b***h. Retarded, big mouth, know-it-all, a*****e, jerk. You forgot ugly, lazy and disrespectful. Shut up b***h. Go fix me a turkey pot pie. No dad, what about you? ******** you. No dad, what about you? ******** you. Dad, what about you? ******** you.
Brian Johnson: Is that for real?
John Bender: You wanna come over sometime? (The Breakfast Club,1985)

9) John Bender: I like those earrings, Claire.
Claire Standish: Shut up.
John Bender: Are those real diamonds, Claire?
Claire Standish: Shut up.
John Bender: I bet they are. Did you work for the money to buy those earrings?
Claire Standish: Shut your mouth.
John Bender: Or did your Daddy buy those for you?
Claire Standish: [shouts] Shut up!
John Bender: I'll bet he bought those for you. I bet those were a Christmas gift. You know what I got for Christmas? Oh, it was a banner ******** year at the old Bender family. I got a carton of cigarettes. The old man grabbed me and said, "Hey, smoke up Johnny." Alright? So go home and cry to your Daddy. Don't cry here, okay? (The Breakfast Club,1985)

10) John Bender: My impression of life at Big Bri's house, "Son?" "Yeah, Dad?" "How was your day, son?" "Great, Dad. How's yours?" "Super. Say, how would like to go fishing this weekend?" "Great, Dad. But I got homework to do." "That's okay, son. You can do it on the boat." "Gee." "Hon, isn't our son swell?" "Yes, dear. Isn't life swell?"
[kiss] (The Breakfast Club,1985)

11) [as arrows rain down on the Spartans, Astinos begins laughing hysterically]
Stelios: What the hell are you laughing at?
Astinos: Well, you had to say it!
Stelios: What?
Astinos: "Fight in the shade"!
[both laugh] (300,2007)

12) [last lines]
Dilios: And so my king died, and my brothers died, barely a year ago. Long I pondered my king's cryptic talk of victory. Time has proven him wise, for from free Greek to free Greek, the word was spread that bold Leonidas and his three hundred, so far from home, laid down their lives. Not just for Sparta, but for all Greece and the promise this country holds.
[takes his spear from a soldier]
Dilios: Now, here on this ragged patch of earth called Plataea, Xerxes's hordes face obliteration!
Spartan Army: HA-OOH!
Dilios: Just there the barbarians huddle, sheer terror gripping tight their hearts with icy fingers... knowing full well what merciless horrors they suffered at the swords and spears of three hundred. Yet they stare now across the plain at *ten thousand* Spartans commanding thirty thousand free Greeks! HA-OOH!
Spartan Army: HA-OOH! HA-OOH! HA-OOH!
Dilios: The enemy outnumber us a paltry three to one, good odds for any Greek. This day we rescue a world from mysticism and tyranny and usher in a future brighter than anything we can imagine.
[puts on his helmet]
Dilios: Give thanks, men, to Leonidas and the brave 300! TO VICTORY!
[the Greek army roars and charges] (300,2007)

13) Stelios: It's an honor to die at your side.
King Leonidas: It's an honor to have lived at yours. (300,2007)

14) Persian: A thousand nations of the Persian empire descend upon you. Our arrows will blot out the sun!
Stelios: Then we will fight in the shade. (300,2007)

15) Dilios: His helmet was stifling, it narrowed his vision. And he must see far. His shield was heavy. It threw him off balance. And his target is far away.
[Leonidas throws his spear and hits the side of Xerxes' face, ripping off his face piercings] (300,2007)

16) King Leonidas: Spartans! Prepare for glory!
Daxos: Glory? Have you gone mad? There is no glory to be had now! Only retreat, or surrender or death!
King Leonidas: Well, that's an easy choice for us, Arcadian! Spartans never retreat! Spartans never surrender! Go spread the word. Let every Greek assembled know the truth of this. Let each among them search his own soul. And while you're at it, search your own. (300,2007)

17) King Leonidas: Children, gather round! No retreat, no surrender; that is Spartan law. And by Spartan law we will stand and fight... and die. A new age has begun. An age of freedom, and all will know, that 300 Spartans gave their last breath to defend it! (300,2007)

1 cool Xerxes: Come Leonidas, let us reason together. It would be a regrettable waste. It would be nothing short of madness for you, brave king, and your valiant troops to perish. All because of a simple misunderstanding. There is much our cultures could share.
King Leonidas: Haven't you noticed? We've been sharing our culture with you all morning. (300,2007)

19) Captain: They look thirsty!
King Leonidas: Well, let's give them something to drink! To the cliffs! (300,2007)

20) King Leonidas: My heart is broken for your loss.
Captain: Heart? I have filled my heart with hate.
King Leonidas: Good. (300,2007)

21) Xerxes: But I am a generous god. I can make you rich beyond all measure. I will make you warlord of all Greece. You will carry my battle standard to the heart of Europa. Your Athenian rivals will kneel at your feet if you will but kneel at mine.
King Leonidas: You are generous as you are divine, O king of kings. Such an offer only a madman would refuse. But the, uh, the idea of kneeling, it's- You see, slaughtering all those men of yours has, uh, well it's left a nasty cramp in my leg, so kneeling will be hard for me. (300,2007)

22) Xerxes: You Greeks take pride in your logic. I suggest you employ it. Consider the beautiful land you so vigorously defend. Picture it reduced to ash at my whim! Consider the fate of your women!
Spartan King Leonidas: Clearly you don't know our women! I might as well have marched them up here, judging by what I've seen. (300,2007)

23) Spartan King Leonidas: Spartans! Ready your breakfast and eat hearty... For tonight, we dine in hell! (300,2007)

24) King Leonidas: This is where we hold them! This is where we fight! This is where they die!
Captain: Earn these shields, boys!
[Spartans cheer]
King Leonidas: Remember this day, men, for it will be yours for all time. (300,2007)

25) [in the midst of the battle]
Astinos: You still here?
Stelios: Somebody's gotta watch your back.
Astinos: Not now, I'm a little busy! (300,2007)

26)Tony Montana: I always tell the truth. Even when I lie. (Scarface,1983)

27) Tony Montana: What you lookin' at? You all a bunch of ********' assholes. You know why? You don't have the guts to be what you wanna be? You need people like me. You need people like me so you can point your ********' fingers and say, "That's the bad guy." So... what that make you? Good? You're not good. You just know how to hide, how to lie. Me, I don't have that problem. Me, I always tell the truth. Even when I lie. So say good night to the bad guy! Come on. The last time you gonna see a bad guy like this again, let me tell you. Come on. Make way for the bad guy. There's a bad guy comin' through! Better get outta his way! (Scarface,1983)

2 cool Tony Montana: You know what your problem is?
Elvira Hancock: What's that?
Tony Montana: You don't got nothing to do with your life. Why don't you get a job? Work with lepers. Blind kids. Anything's gotta be better than lying around all day waiting for me to ******** you.
Elvira Hancock: Don't toot your horn, honey. You're not that good. (Scarface,1983)

29) [to Sosa's assassins]
Tony Montana: I'm Tony Montana! You ******** with me, you ********' with the best! (Scarface,1983)

30) Tony Montana: In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women. (Scarface,1983)

31) Hector the Toad: You want to give me the cash, or do I kill your brother first, before I kill you?
Tony Montana: Why don't you try sticking your head up your a**? See if it fits. (Scarface,1983)

32) Tony Montana: Who put this thing together? Me, that's who! Who do I trust? Me! (Scarface,1983)

33) Tony Montana: I never ******** anybody over in my life didn't have it coming to them. You got that? All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don't break them for no one. Do you understand? That piece of s**t up there, I never liked him, I never trusted him. For all I know he had me set up and had my friend Angel Fernandez killed. But that's history. I'm here, he's not. Do you wanna go on with me, you say it. You don't, then you make a move. (Scarface,1983)

34) Tony Montana: You know what capitalism is? Getting ********! (Scarface,1983)

35) Tony Montana: This is paradise, I'm tellin' ya. This town like a great big p***y just waiting to get ********. (Scarface,1983)

36) Alejandro Sosa: I only tell you once. Don't ******** me, Tony. Don't you ever try to ******** me. (Scarface,1983)

37) Alejandro Sosa: Alberto is an expert in the disposal business. (Scarface,1983)

3 cool Elvira: Can't you stop saying ******** all the time? (Scarface,1983)

39) Tony Montana: I got ears, ya know. I hear things.
Frank Lopez: Yeah? What do you hear about Echevierra and the Diaz brothers? What about them? What about Gaspar Gomez? What is he gonna do when you start moving 2000 keys?
Tony Montana: ******** Gaspar Gomez! And ******** the ********' Diaz brothers! ******** 'em all! I bury those cockroaches! (Scarface,1983)

40) Tony Montana: You wanna waste my time? Okay. I call my lawyer. He's the best lawyer in Miami. He's such a good lawyer, that by tomorrow morning, you gonna be working in Alaska. So dress warm. (Scarface,1983)

41) Tony Montana: Here pelican, pelican, pelican... (Scarface,1983)

42) [watching news on TV]
Tony Montana: I know that. But you know why? Because you got your head up your culo, that's why. That ******** guy. He never tells the truth. That ********. (Scarface,1983)

43) [during the final shootout with Sosa's assassins]
Tony Montana: You think you can take me? You need a ******** army if you gonna take me! (Scarface,1983)

44) Tony Montana: Is this it? That's what it's all about, Manny? Eating, drinking, ********, sucking? Snorting? Then what? You're 50. You got a bag for a belly. You got tits, you need a bra. They got hair on them. You got a liver, they got spots on it, and you're eating this ********' s**t, looking like these rich ******** mummies in here... Look at that. A junkie. I got a ********' junkie for a wife. She don't eat nothing. Sleeps all day with them black shades on. Wakes up with a Quaalude, and who won't ******** me 'cause she's in a coma. I can't even have a kid with her, Manny. Her womb is so polluted, I can't even have a ********' little baby with her!
Manolo Ray: C'mon Tony...
Elvira Hancock: You son of a b***h!... you ********!...
[throws wine in Tony's face]
Elvira Hancock: HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE THAT! What makes you so much better than me? What do you do? Kill people? Deal your drugs? Real contribution to human history Tony! What makes you think you can be a father? You don't even know how to be a good husband! (Scarafce,1983)

45) Tony Montana: Bet you feel good, huh? Bet you feel good to kill a mother and her kids, huh, bet you feel BIG...
Alberto The Shadow: Shut your mouth!
Tony Montana: ...Like, you big man. Well ******** you. What do you think I am? You think I'd kill two kids and a woman? ******** that! I don't need that s**t in my life.
[Alberto reaches for detonator's button]
Tony Montana: You die ********!
[Tony shoots him in the head]
Tony Montana: What'd you think of that, huh? What you think, I'm a ******** worm like you? I told you, man, I told you! Don't ******** with me! I told you, no ******** kids! No, but you wouldn't listen, why, you stupid ********, look at you now. (Scarface,1983)

46) Manny: [to a bikini girl who has slapped him] b***h! LESBIAN! (Scarface,1983)

47) Frank Lopez: Tony, don't kill me, please!
Tony Montana: I ain't gonna kill you.
Frank Lopez: Oh Christ, thank you! Thank you!
[Tony looks at Manny]
Tony Montana: Manolo, shoot that piece of s**t! (Scarface,1983)

4 cool Elvira: You know what you're becoming, Tony? You're an immigrant spick millionaire, who can't stop talking about money...
Tony Montana: Who the ******** you calling a spick, mang? You white piece of bread. Get outta the way of the television. (Scarface,1983)

49) Tony Montana: The only thing in this world that gives orders... is balls. (Scarface,1983)

50) Tony Montana: [watching flamingos on TV] Come on, pelicans! Fly, fly away! (Scarface,1983)

51) Tony Montana: Every dog has his day, huh, Mel?
Bernstein: I told him. It didn't make any sense, clipping you when we had you working for us. He wouldn't listen. He got hot tonight, about the broad, you know?
Bernstein: He ******** up.
Tony Montana: You too, Mel. You ******** up.
Bernstein: Don't go too far, Tony.
Tony Montana: I not, Mel, you are.
[Tony shoots Bernstein in the gut, he gasps and groans]
Bernstein: ********. You can't shoot a cop!
Tony Montana: Whoever says you was one?
[Tony leans forward, aiming the gun at Bernstein]
Bernstein: Wait a minute! You let me go. I'll fix this up.
Tony Montana: Sure, Mel. Maybe you can hand out yourself one of them first class tickets to the Resurrection.
Bernstein: ******** punk. Son of a b***h.
[Tony stands up]
Tony Montana: So long, Mel, have a good trip.
Bernstein: ******** you! (Scarface,1983)

52) Tony Montana: Hey, Frank, you're a piece of s**t.
Frank Lopez: What are you talking about?
Tony Montana: You know what I'm taking about about, you ******** cockroach. (Scarface,1983)

53) Frank Lopez: You know what a chazzer is?
Tony Montana: No, Frank, you tell me. What is a chazzer?
Frank Lopez: It's a Yiddish word for "pig." See, the guy, he wants more than what he needs. He don't fly straight no more. (Scarface,1983)

54) Tony Montana: Hey, how'd you like that? Huh? You ********' maricón! Hey! (Scarface,1983)

55) Alejandro Sosa: I told you a long time ago, you ******** little monkey, not to ******** ME! (Scarface,1983)

56) Tony Montana: [after coldly disposing of Frank Lopez and Mel Berstein] OK, come on.
Manny: What about Ernie?
[Lopez's assistant]
Tony Montana: [very tense music builds, shot of Ernie sweating and fidgeting, then slow zoom shot of Tony and Manny looking at Ernie. Tense music stops] You want a job, Ernie?
Ernie: [Ernie breathes a huge sigh of relief] Sure, Tony. (Scarface,1983)

57)[Drebin searches a drawer]
Frank: Bingo!
[pulls out a bingo card] (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

5 cool [offering a cigar]
Vincent Ludwig: Cuban?
Frank: No, Dutch-Irish. My father was from Wales. (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

59) Jane: Would you like a nightcap?
Frank: No thank you, I don't wear them. (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

60) [while Jane is erotically sucking his finger]
Frank: I've got nine more. (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

61) Mrs. Nordberg: Oh, my poor Nordberg! He was such a good man, Frank. He never wanted to hurt anyone. Who would do such a thing?
Frank: It's hard to tell. A gang of thugs, a blackmailer, an angry husband, a gay lover... (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

62) Jane: I'm boiling a roast. How hot and wet do you like it?
Frank: Very hot, and awfully wet. (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

63) [Frank has beaten a horde of America's most-feared world leaders in a conference room and heads for a door]
Muammar al-Qaddafi: Hey, who are you?
Frank: I'm Lt. Frank Drebin! Police Squad! And don't ever let me catch you guys in America!
[the door hits Frank in the face and he loses his balance] (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

64) Det. Nordberg: Drugs... drugs...
Frank: Nurse! get this man some drugs!
[nurse administers drugs]
Det. Nordberg: No... no...
[pulls Frank towards him]
Det. Nordberg: Heroin. Heroin, Frank.
Frank: Uh... that's a pretty tall order, it'll take a couple of days for that one. (The Naked Gun: From the Files of Police Squad!,198 cool

65) Johnny Knoxville: I'm Johnny Knoxville, and welcome to "Jackass"! (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

66) Bam Margera: Since we no longer have to bleep cuss words, I promise I will get my mom to say, "********" by the end of this movie.
[after seeing an alligator in her house]
April Margera: That's the scariest ******** thing I ever saw! (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

67) Chris Pontius: Wait a minute. I already know my fortune, it's partying! (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

6 cool Bam Margera: Whose d**k do I gotta suck to get some explosions around here? (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

69) Chris Pontius: Hi, I'm Bunny the Lifeguard, any of these alligators try to ruin our swimming, I'm gonna wrestle them down, and probably have my way with them. (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

70) Ryan Dunn: I'm surrounded by cacti, for ******** sake... IT'S CACTI!
Steve-O: It's cactus!
Ryan Dunn: Whatever it is, it hurts! (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

71) Johnny Knoxville: That had bad news written all over it.
Bam Margera: Dunn can't drive for s**t! (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

72) Bam Margera: [from extended footage, on phone] How much does Rake hate mustard?
[to cameraman]
Bam Margera: This is Rake's mom and she says I wouldn't be able to have children in my future. (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

73) Johnny Knoxville: [dazed, holding head after golf cart accident] I don't know what happened. I just remember we went in the air and the next thing I know, I'm just... ********.
Bam Margera: Dude, you were hauling so much a**! (Jackass: The Movie,2002)

74) Johnny Knoxville: Rectal bleeding... another first for Jackass. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

75) Chris Pontius: I can't believe I'm fishing with Steve-o as my bait! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

76) April Margera: Why would you burn him in the first place, Dunn?
Ryan Dunn: 'Cause it was funny... (Jackass Number Two,2006)

77) Johnny Knoxville: Hi, I'm Johnny Knoxville, and I'm going to the moon! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

7 cool Bam Margera: Please God, don't let there be a "Jackass 3". (Jackass Number Two,2006)

79) Dave England: Oh God! Oh... Oh... Oh God!... my a** hurts so ******** bad! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

80) Chris Pontius: [after drinking horse semen] I'm ashamed of myself. I really am. I'm completely ashamed of myself. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

81) Bam Margera: Ape, I got a muffed-up a** butt!
April Margera: I know, and you had the cutest butt ever and now you ruined it!
Bam Margera: No, d**k Farm Dunn ruined it. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

82) [Bam has just been branded with a p***s-shaped branding iron]
Bam Margera: You gave me a hologram d**k! There's three solid dicks, there's one half-assed one right here, and then you gave me a set of balls.
Johnny Knoxville: But a sweet set of balls!
Bam Margera: Rad... I'd rather rip my d**k off and throw it in the river than to do that again. Goddamn! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

83) Johnny Knoxville: [while Bam is in trailor with Cobra] You crying?
Bam Margera: Yeah. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

84) Steve-O: [chuckling] You just pleasured a horse. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

85) Ryan Dunn: Ooh my hip! I think I just gave birth! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

86) Chris Pontius: [after Matt Hoffman attempts to jump the English Channal on his bike] He didnt even make it to Germany! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

87) Johnny Knoxville: [after taking a fall] My head stopped my body from getting really hurt on that. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

8 cool Chris Pontius: Water-based lubricants, friend or foe? You be the judge. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

89) Ryan Dunn: [Johnny Knoxville is about to be launched with the rocket] This isn’t the best idea.
Bam Margera: Yes it is... (Jackass Number Two,2006)

90) Dimitry Elyashkevich: [Johnny Knoxville is ready to be launced on the rocket] 5... 4... 3... 2... 1!
Bam Margera: Later!
[Presses the launch button] (Jackass Number Two,2006)

91) Chris Pontius: Hey Ehren, maybe after this movie you'll finally lose your virginity. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

92) Bam Margera: [before the Riot Control skit] If Knoxville goes in there, I'll French kiss him. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

93) Steve-O: I just had a leech chomp my eyeball. YES! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

94) Johnny Knoxville: [while gagging after Pontius drinks the horse semen] I never puke ever, and I really almost puked then. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

95) Phil Margera: [after seeing Bam's brand] He should have made it bigger and more realistic, that puny thing's embarrassing! (Jackass Number Two,2006)

96) Bam Margera: [after the Yak Charge] That couldn't have gone any better. I didn't know Knoxville could do back flips. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

97) Chris Pontius: [after Wee Man and Preston go bungee jumping off the bridge] That was intense, really intense. Well, not really intense, but pretty intense. (Jackass Number Two,2006)

9 cool Cat Admiring Bitter Customer: Cute cat. What's his name?
Randal Graves: Annoying customer.
Cat Admiring Bitter Customer: [grabs pack of cigarettes] ********' dickhead. (Clerks.,1994)

99) Jay: I feel good today, Silent Bob, we're gonna make some money, then you know what we're going to do? We're gonna go to that party, and we're gonna get some p***y, and I'm gonna ******** this b***h, and ******** this b***h, I'll ******** ANYTHING THAT MOVES! What the ******** you lookin at, I'll kick yo ******** a**! s**t yeah. Doesn't that ******** owe me 10 bucks? You know, ******** tonight, we're gonna rip off that ******** head, and take out his ********' SOUL. Hey, what's up baby, what's up, sluts? (Clerks.,1994)

100) Randal Graves: So your argument is that title dictates behavior?
Dante Hicks: What?
Randal Graves: The reason you won't let me borrow your car is because I have a title and a job description, and I'm supposed to follow it, right?
Dante Hicks: Exactly.
Tabloid Reading Customer: I saw one, one time, that said the world was ending the next week. Then in the next week's paper, they said we were miraculously saved at the zero hour by a Koala-fish mutant bird. Crazy s**t.
Randal Graves: So I'm no more responsible for my own decisions while I'm here at work than, say, the Death Squad soldiers in Bosnia?
Dante Hicks: That's stretching it. You're not being asked to slay children or anything.
Randal Graves: Not yet.
[takes a drink of water]
Tabloid Reading Customer: And I remember this one time the damn paper said...
[Randal spits water at him]
Tabloid Reading Customer: I'm going to break your ******** head! You ******** jerk-off!
Dante Hicks: Sir! Sir, I'm sorry! He didn't mean it! He meant to hit me.
Tabloid Reading Customer: Well, he missed!
Dante Hicks: I know. I'm sorry. Here, let me refund your money, and we'll call it even.
Tabloid Reading Customer: I'll never come in here again.
[to Randal]
Tabloid Reading Customer: And if I ever see you again, I'm gonna break your ******** head open!
[Randal salutes him, customer leaves]
Dante Hicks: What'd you do that for?
Randal Graves: Two reasons: one, I hate when the people can't shut up about the stupid tabloid headlines.
Dante Hicks: Jesus!
Randal Graves: And two, to make a point: title does not dictate behavior. If title dictated my behavior, as a clerk serving the public, I wouldn't be allowed to spit a mouthful of water at that guy. But I did, so my point is that people dictate their own behavior. Hence, even though I'm a clerk in this video store, I choose to go rent videos at Big Choice. Agreed?
[Dante gives Randal his car keys]
Dante Hicks: You're a danger to both the dead and the living.
Randal Graves: I like to think I'm a master of my own destiny.
Dante Hicks: Please, get the hell out of here.
Randal Graves: Oh, come on. You know I'm your hero. (Clerks.,1994)

101) Coroner: My only question is how did she come to have sex with the dead guy?
Dante Hicks: She thought it was me.
Coroner: What kind of convenience store do you run here? (Clerks.,1994)

102) Randal Graves: Which did you like better? "Jedi" or "The Empire Strikes Back"?
Dante Hicks: "Empire".
Randal Graves: Blasphemy.
Dante Hicks: "Empire" had the better ending. I mean, Luke gets his hand cut off, finds out Vader's his father, Han gets frozen and taken away by Boba Fett. It ends on such a down note. I mean, that's what life is, a series of down endings. All "Jedi" had was a bunch of Muppets. (Clerks.,1994)

103) Dante Hicks: You ever notice how all the prices end in nine? Damn, that's eerie.
Randal Graves: [reading a magazine] Have you ever wondered how much the average j**z-mopper makes per hour?
Dante Hicks: What's a j**z-mopper?
Randal Graves: He's the guy that cleans up the nudie booth after each guy jerks off.
Dante Hicks: Nudie booth?
Randal Graves: Yeah, nudie booth. You've never been in a nudie booth?
Dante Hicks: I guess not.
Randal Graves: Oh, it's great. There's this glass between you and these chicks, and they put on a show for you for like 10 bucks.
Dante Hicks: What kinda show?
[Customer walks up to counter with a bottle of glass cleaner and a roll of paper towels]
Randal Graves: They do the weirdest, craziest s**t you like to see chicks do. They insert things into any opening on their body - ANY opening.
Dante Hicks: Could we not talk about this right now?
Randal Graves: The j**z-mopper's job is to clean off the glass after each guy shoots a load. I don't know if you noticed, but c** leaves streaks if you don't clean it right away.
Offended Customer: I will never come to this place again!
Dante Hicks: I'm sorry?
Offended Customer: Using filthy language in front of the customers, you both should be fired!
Dante Hicks: I'm sorry, I guess we got carried away.
Offended Customer: I don't know if sorry could make up for it, you've highly offended me.
Randal Graves: Well if you thinks that's offensive, check this out!
[Shows him graphic picture from porn mag]
Randal Graves: I think you can see her kidneys! (Clerks.,1994)

104) Indecisive Video Customer: They say so much, but they never tell you if it's any good... are either one of these any good?... Sir?
Randal Graves: What?
Indecisive Video Customer: Are either one of these any good?
Randal Graves: I don't watch movies.
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, have you heard anything about either one of them?
Randal Graves: I find it's best to stay out of other people's affairs.
Indecisive Video Customer: You mean you've haven't heard anybody say anything about either one of these?
Randal Graves: Nope.
Indecisive Video Customer: [Turns around, then shows Randal the same movies] Well, what about these two?
Randal Graves: Oh, they suck.
Indecisive Video Customer: These are the same two movies! You weren't paying any attention!
Randal Graves: No, I wasn't.
Indecisive Video Customer: I don't think your manager would appreciate...
Randal Graves: I don't appreciate your ruse, ma'am.
Indecisive Video Customer: I beg your pardon?
Randal Graves: Your ruse. Your cunning attempt to trick me.
Indecisive Video Customer: I was only pointing out that you weren't paying any attention to what I was saying!
Randal Graves: And I hope it feels good.
Indecisive Video Customer: You hope WHAT feels good?
Randal Graves: I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilarating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?
Indecisive Video Customer: Well, this is the last time I rent here.
Randal Graves: You'll be missed.
Indecisive Video Customer: Screw you!
[leaves]
Randal Graves: [runs to the door] Hey! You're not allowed to rent here anymore!
Jay: [who has been standing outside, and has no idea what's going on] Yeah! (Clerks.,1994)

105) Dante Hicks: You said you only had sex with three different guys; you never mentioned him!
Veronica Loughran: Because I never HAD sex with him.
Dante Hicks: You sucked his d**k!
Veronica Loughran: We went out a few times. We never had sex but we fooled around.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, WHY did you tell me you only had sex with three different guys?
Veronica Loughran: Because I DID only have sex with three different guys; that doesn't mean I didn't just go with people.
Dante Hicks: Oh my God, I feel so nauseous!
Veronica Loughran: I'm sorry, Dante, I thought you understood!
Dante Hicks: I did understand! I understood that you had sex with three different guys and that's all you said!
Veronica Loughran: Please calm down.
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: Dante...
Dante Hicks: How many dicks have you sucked?
Veronica Loughran: Let it go!
Dante Hicks: How many?
Veronica Loughran: All right, shut up a second and I'll tell you! Jesus! I didn't freak out like this when you told me how many girls you ********!
Dante Hicks: This is different, this is important. How many?
[long pause as customer buys something]
Dante Hicks: Well?
Veronica Loughran: Something like... 36.
Dante Hicks: What? Something like 36?
Veronica Loughran: Lower your voice.
Dante Hicks: Wait a minute, what is that anyway, something like 36? Does that INCLUDE me?
Veronica Loughran: Ummm... 37.
Dante Hicks: I'm 37? (Clerks.,1994)

106) Dante Hicks: 37! My girlfriend's sucked 37 dicks!
Customer with Diapers: In a row? (Clerks.,1994)

107) Dante Hicks: Hey, try not to suck any d**k on the way through the parking lot! (Clerks.,1994)

10 cool Randal Graves: This job would be great if it wasn't for the ******** customers. (Clerks.,1994)

109) Caged Animal Masturbator: It's important to have a job that makes a difference, boys. That's why I manually masturbate caged animals for artificial insemination. (Clerks.,1994)

110) [Randal is on the phone when a woman and little girl come to the counter]
'Happy-Scrappy' Mom: Excuse me, do you sell videos?
Randal Graves: Yeah, what're you looking for?
'Happy-Scrappy' Kid: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup.
Randal Graves: Okay, hang on, I'm on the phone with the distribution house now, lemme make sure we got it. What was it called again?
'Happy-Scrappy' Mom: Happy Scrappy Hero Pup.
'Happy-Scrappy' Kid: Happy Scrappy!
'Happy-Scrappy' Mom: She loves it.
Randal Graves: Obviously. Yeah, hello, this is RST Video, customer number 4352, I need to place an order. Okay, I need one each of the following tapes: "Whispers in the Wind", "To Each His Own", "Put It Where It Doesn't Belong", "My Pipes Need Cleaning", "All ******** Volume 8", "I Need Your c**k", "a**-Worshipping Rim-Jobbers", "My c**t Needs Shafts", "c** Clean", "c**-Gargling Naked Sluts", "c** Buns III", "Cumming in Socks", "c** On Eileen", "Huge Black Cocks and Pearly White c**", "Girls Who Crave c**k", "Girls Who Crave c**t", "Men Alone II: the KY Connection", "Pink p***y Lips", and, uh, oh yeah, "All Holes Filled with Hard c**k". Uh-huh... yeah... Oh, wait, and, what was that called again? (Clerks.,1994)

111) Dante Hicks: Embolism in a pool, what an embarrassing way to die.
Randal Graves: That's nothing compared to how my cousin Walter died.
Dante Hicks: How did he go?
Randal Graves: He broke his neck.
Dante Hicks: You call that embarrassing?
Randal Graves: He broke his neck while trying to suck his own d**k! (Clerks.,1994)

112) Randal Graves: Fine then, just let me borrow your car.
Dante Hicks: What for?
Randal Graves: I want to go rent a movie. What was that?
Dante Hicks: You work at a video store!
Randal Graves: I work at a shitty video store! I want to go to a good video store and get a good movie! (Clerks.,1994)

113) Jay: Yeah, Silent Bob, your a rude ********, you know that? But you're cute has hell. I could go down on you, suck you, line up three other guys and make like a circus seal.
[Jay makes a rude head gesture and car horn honks]
Jay: Ewww, you ******** f*****t, I HATE guys. I LOVE WOMEN! (Clerks.,1994)

114) Jay: Pack o' wraps, my brotherman, time to kick back, drink some beers and shmoke some weed! (Clerks.,1994)

115) Veronica Loughran: Hi, Randal.
Randal Graves: Thirty-seven?
Dante Hicks: Shut up! (Clerks.,1994)

116) Shannon Hamilton: That's it. You're dead, mallrat! I'm gonna ******** you up beyond repair!
Brodie: Ladies and gentlemen, this tall drink of water headed my way is a pillar of the shopping community who informed me earlier today of a nefarious plan of his to screw my girlfriend in an extremely uncomfortable place.
Gil Hicks: What... like the back of a Volkswagen? (Mallrats,1995)

117) Brandi: [calm and nefarious tone] Suitor #2, if you were a comic book character, which one would you be?
[Brodie is caught off guard, but delighted with the question]
Brodie: Wow! That's a good question. Tough one though. I mean, what does one gauge his response on: physical powers? Keen detection skills? The ability to banter well with super villians? Or even...
Brandi: [interupting] How's your comic book collection, Brodie?
Brodie: Oh it's still big, but I've been trading the...
[T.S. punches Brodie's arm and shows an angry look, realizing they have been made]
Brodie: Uh... comics? What the hell are you talking about? Hey lady, I don't collect comics! Comics are for kids! (Mallrats,1995)

11 cool Brandi: Suitor number 3, is your kiss like a soft breeze, a firm handshake or a jackhammer?
Gil Hicks: Definitely a jackhammer, I'm in there with some pressure and when I'm done, you're not the same as before. You're changed.
Brodie: Where do you come up with this s**t? That's the cheesiest response to an honest question I have ever heard. I saw you kiss and it wasn't anything like that.
Bob Summers: [Chuckling] Suitor #2, you'll have to wait until you're addressed before you respond.
Brodie: Richard Dawson, why don't you just go back to your podium until it's time to play The Feud. All right?
[Audience laughs]
Gil Hicks: Who the hell did you see me kiss?
Brodie: Some dude backstage. I don't know who he was but he seemed unimpressed.
Gil Hicks: I didn't kiss any guy backstage. I swear. I'm not gay.
Brodie: Hey, Suitorette, this guys a homophobe. You heard how repulsed he sounded. Is this the kind of guy you want to spend a vacation with? This hate-monger?
Gil Hicks: I don't hate gay people.
Brodie: So you love them?
Gil Hicks: Yes. I mean no.
Brodie: Textbook closet case self-loather. Can't be comfortable with his own sexuality. (Mallrats,1995)

119) [At a Dating Game-like game show]
Brandi: Second suitor: if we were making whoopee, what sounds would you make?
Brodie: Wait, what's whoopee?
Brandi: You know, being intimate.
Brodie: What? Like ********? (Mallrats,1995)

120) Brandi: Second suitor, would you ever make whoopie in public?
Brodie: I already did once today.
[clicks his finger at Renee]
Brodie: But my cousin Walter jerked off in public once. True story. He was on a plane to New Mexico when all of the sudden the hydraulics went. The plane started spinning around, going out of control, so he decides it's all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there. So all the other passengers take a cue from him and they start whipping it out and beating like mad. So all the passengers are beating off, plummeting to their certain doom, when all of the sudden, snap! The hydraulics kick back in. The plane rights itself and it land safely and everyone puts their pieces or, whatever, you know, away and deboard. No one mentions the phenomenon to anyone else.
Gil Hicks: Well, did he c**, or what?
Brodie: Jesus Christ, man! There's just some things you don't talk about in public! (Mallrats,1995)

121) Brandi: Suitor Number Three, what would our first date be like?
Gil Hicks: Well, uh, first I'd take you shopping to stores you wanna shop in, and then we'd do a little lunch, probably at the Cheese Haus, followed by some golfing. And then at night, we'd take in an opera, probably Die Fledermaus, and then I'd follow it up with a drive to a secluded beach where I'd pop on the radio and we could slow-dance till the sun came up.
Brodie: That was the biggest load of crap I've ever heard. I mean, look at you. You're the kind of guy who would beg for sex. And I should know, we can smell our own. (Mallrats,1995)

122) Stan Lee: They look happy, don't they?
Brodie: What, the bras? (Mallrats,1995)

more of my fav movie quotes:
1) Master Wong: It is better to die like a tiger, than to live like a p***y. (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

2) Feng: What part of "sudden death" didn't you understand? (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

3)Master Wong: Ping Pong... is not the macarena. It takes patience. She is like a fine, well-aged prostitute... it takes years to learn her tricks.
[chuckles] (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

4) Master Wong: She is cruel, laughs at you when you are naked, but you keep coming back for more, and more! Why? Because she is the only prostitute I can afford. (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

5) Karl Wolfschtagg: You are so close to defeat that it already reeks of your cheap cologne.
Master Wong: [smirks] The joke's on you, pretty boy. It's not cologne, it's lady speed stick. (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

6) Karl Wolfschtagg: Daytona, I have said some cruel things about you. To my friends here at the tournament, I tell them that the reason that you hate me so much, is because I had sex with your mother.
Randy Daytona: My mother died when I was two. I hardly knew her.
Karl Wolfschtagg: Yeah I know it's a horrible thing to say. And yet these things that I say over and over again... I do not mean them. Because in truth, you are the greatest player I have ever scene. Other than myself, practicing in front of a mirror. Which I do... everyday... in the nude. I'm sorry for you, that your papa is not here to see you. I think he would be very proud of you.
Randy Daytona: Yeah.
Karl Wolfschtagg: So proud of you, that he would probably bet the money on you again. I could use the cash! Haha. Tell your dead parents I said "What's Up?" (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

7) Gary: [the building is about to self destruct] I'm gonna save the panda!
[runs offscreen]
Gary: Ahhh!
[runs back on screen]
Gary: Panda's dead!
[runs away] (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

cool Feng: Ping pong, or as the Chinese say: "Ping pong". (Balls Of Fury, 2007)

9) Drago: If he dies, he dies. (Rocky IV, 1985)

10) Drago: I must break you. (Rocky IV, 1985)