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Journal of the twilight
beware of the dragon trying to eat you. in other words, beware of me.
More Poems.


hello, I finally decided to put another poem to paper. this one does not have anything to do with the story I am creating. This one delves into my darker side, however it is not my best work since I tried to make it rhyme. well, here you go.

Confessions of the Beast

I quietly follow the footfalls of humanity,
Loathing and despising every mark in my path.
Putting on the facade of joy.
I hide behind the mask,
Sheathing my claws and fangs in darkness.
I watch my unaware enemy come forth like a flood.
I curse his arrogance as he sits in the throne.
I hone my blade in obscurity till it cleaves through stone,
Grinning at the thought of shedding his blood.
Still, as I sit in this dark, lonely abyss,
I begin to wonder about my chaotic task.
I had delved too deep into my ploy,
Now there are those who I would spare my wrath,
I fear that this will dip me into the depth of insanity.
I want to stop, to pull myself away from this,
But I find that I am bound too tightly.






User Comments: [4] [add]
La_Reine_Belle
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sat Dec 06, 2008 @ 02:31am
I like it, but it's hard not to compare it to Aggario. But that's probably just me. whee


commentCommented on: Sat Dec 06, 2008 @ 04:59am
so i get bitched at to read a poem about something i already knew...its good...but it didnt require the bitching



finfageek
Community Member
The Reaper of the Sky
Community Member
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commentCommented on: Sun Dec 07, 2008 @ 09:23pm
Dark... very dark. I like it.


commentCommented on: Sun Dec 14, 2008 @ 09:31pm
OK, criticism time. First off, break up your verses; it would make reading it much easier. To me, poetry should have a meter to it and this one didn't. It was all over the board. In your sentence, "I curse his arrogance as he sits in the throne" I would have said "on the throne" not "in the throne".

Overall, the message it is giving sounds like one of a plea for help, from someone who is evil and wishes he were not. It's not bad dear, but it's not what I would consider stellar work.



Shanra the Dragon Bard
Community Member
User Comments: [4] [add]
 
 
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