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I've done something so horrible now to the one I love and I'm so afraid that he'll... leave me
I don't want him to, I really don't. I've cried my whole heart out and I'm still crying. The tears won't stop.
I'm still madly in love with him, but I just hurt him.... I didn't mean to...
I really am horrible

I don't want him to leave me, but if he chooses to, then... well, I really don't know what'll happen next. I want him to be happy, but I want him to be happy with me, although it was me who did this to him...

Please Sam, I really do love you! [If you're reading this]
I want it back, everything we had, the happiness, the silliness, the love, everything!

Why do I ever open my heart? I guess I just wasn't meant to fall in love....

*feels suicidal now*....