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Precious died the other day and I don't feel bad. I know as a human being I should, but I don't. My dad is upset but he claims that it's only because as a human he hurts when people die.

I think it's because she was an old lover that he cheated on my mother with when I was a kid. He says they were just good friends, but I always knew. I knew there was more and I hated her so much for it.

Dad says she use to be so nice and buy me, my sister and brother things but I don't remember that s**t at all and neither do my siblings. I told him I didn't feel bad for her and that I know I should, but I just don't.

Dad thinks that I just have emotional issues, that I'm distant and messed up. Is that true? Is it wrong to not care about a woman who wrecked my mother and my life for almost six years? Is it wrong to hate the person who helped create my anger and resentment toward all women?

Is it wrong to feel insecure and untrustworthy because my father cheated on my mother and abandoned her alot? I'm forced to spend the rest of my life wondering if Jennifer is even my biological sister too. She came up to my dad recently and asked him questions. She thinks dad is her dad.

What's ******** up is she's only a few months younger than me. If she is his, then my dad screwed Precious months after I was concieved. Again, he claims that he isn't, but I don't know. Now my mother is back to worrying about whether or not Precious will still be on his mind even after passing.

Then I find out she's visited my dad alot at his job. My dad says he always tried to walk away but she's always so clingy to him and..it kills me. It scares me to think that that woman still wanted my father after he made the right decision to go back to being faithful to my mother. After everything that happened that day with the cops, her, my dad, Miss.Garette, all of those bastards in her family, and she wanted my dad still.

I can't pity her. I don't and I won't. She ruined my childhood.