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Today I made the mistake of opening Pandora's box... I went snooping through my old email address and stumbled upon all of the old conversation between my ex and I... What a stupid thing for me to do... While reading the messages made me smile... the aftermath was like a blow to my heart... I didn't want to remember how much love I once gave away to someone.

It's so hard to see that and not wish for it again. It's so hard to live in the present and pave a future when the past seems so much better than any other option, but it isn't an option. It's gone, and it isn't ever coming back..

I thought I was over it.. over him.. I just realized, I've been living numb.. not feeling, ignoring, suppressing, forcing myself to not remember...

Life hurts...

You used to captivate me by your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face—it haunts my once pleasant dreams
Your voice—it chased away all the sanity in me