It's so fun having a journal! I haven't had one since I was ten. Again, the semi-anonymous nature of Gaia comes to my rescue here, and I feel a little less inhibited about writing. I mean, that "surfer girl" post was awfully silly and more than a little self-congratulatory, don't you think? I wouldn't want my co-workers to see something like that. Professional image and all rolleyes
I don't mean to discount your existance, person-who-might-actually-read-this. You're at least as real as I am. But I don't live next to you, so I hope you'll forgive me if that changes the tenor of our communications. In essence, you're a real life version of that imaginary reader who I thought might peruse my journal back when I was ten. Don't worry, while that presumes a certain level of intimacy, you always have the option of closing this page and moving on. And neither of us has to deal with subsequent awkwardness, as neighbors who reveal too much of themselves to each other do ("Better dodge that Wolfe character, she might talk my ear off about surfing. It's not as if she actually KNOWS anything about it." wink
So.
Here I am, third day out of six on the road neutral Truthfully, this is sort of a "hump day" where I have to keep myself together. First day is a "home day", second day I'm busy, third day is time to realize I have three more days to go. So, it's important to keep my spirits up and focus on stuff I'm interested in (like, aren't those hills breathtaking?)
But it can be tough sometimes to stay upbeat. Not to take too much advantage of our presumed candor, but I'm feeling more than a bit bloated and out of sorts this morning. The crying jag before I left home should have been a heads up, of course. I've always said I envy others with more regular lives. If you know what I mean. Anyway, various plans to run about and be productive seem impractical right now.
Since I don't work until the afternoon, I am therefore dedicating this morning to goofing off. The hotel is in the middle of nowhere (the Utah desert, if you must know), and it's over 40 (100+) outside, for sure. So I am off the hook for my run, and I am off the hook for doing anything other than vegging here in airconditioned comfort. So, I'll probably just surf the internet, read my novel (Tenant of Wildfell Hall. Go Brontes!) and wait for OB to get up (he's a musician and works late) and take me "out". He was talking about trying out our play, and that might sound good once I've got enough tea in me. Right now, breakfast is sitting heavier than it ought to, so we'll see. We might just wander and chat with people. Anything to make me feel less isolated here in America's outback.
Anyway, I promise tomorrow I'll feel better and write a perky entry with some attempt at insight. I've done this long enough to know that bad days pass. And this isn't really a bad day. It's just a day when everything seems a bit much, that's all.
(Hmmm...just started raining outside. Maybe it'll cool down enough for an actual stroll. I should get SOME exercise. Never have been a fan of those hotel treadmills.)
Ta for now,
V
