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Ahh, the awesomeness of this year...but also the harshness. |
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Well, I'm a pretty busy man these days. I mean, Monday I go to Barnes and Noble after school to meet up with some friends for a couple hours. Tuesdays are S.A.D.D. meetings, Wednesdays are hour-long sectionals, Thursdays are four hour-long band practices, and Fridays are football games. I'm so busy... but I don't mind, considering I have almost NO homework. I love it.
I kind of got myself a bit down earlier. I didn't mean to. I was looking through the gay/lesbian books at Barnes and Noble and there was a book with advice on how to come out to friends and family... Well, it's not a problem with my friends, considering most of them know, but my family is a different story. My sister knows and all, but it's more my parents. Whenever I brought it up before (when I was a freshman), my mom always said "You're not gay; do you know what it means to be one?" and I remember her always saying that she wanted me to stop talking to this "Luna" person I was with because I brought something up about him once by accident. I was confused that year... but I've decided that as soon as I turn 18, I'm coming out. I'm going to tell my parents about my pansexuality. My gender complex. Everything.
I'm nervous as all hell. I mean, I'm scared that they're going to say that I don't know what I'm talking about. That's my biggest fear... I really wanted to go to that support group in Manchester, but now, I don't have a reason to go, in my parents' eyes. Originally, I said I wanted to accompany a friend, but he ended up being uninterested. I need some excuse to go out on Tuesday nights... I just don't have one. And I have no other friends around here I could take.
I guess once I'm 18 I can begin to attend, but it's so far away and I fel like I need the support now... Though more and more people are coming out, I just find it hard as ever to say anything to them. And it's really getting me down.
Well, I'm not too angsty on here, usually, so I guess that this is a first. But anyway... I'm going to end here since I don't really know what else I would say.
Oyasumi.
-Aaron
 Gundam Pilot 06 · Tue Sep 19, 2006 @ 12:58am · 0 Comments |
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