The path i walk is long and layed bare in front of me....And the ones i'm leaving behind are many... don't cry for me... For your tears are too sweet and divine for this selfish act i must preform...... You're too good for me... for i am not worthy of anyone... My heart runs a different path than the majority around here... You can't know the things i have done and the things i will do.. for they will all be used against me........ My heart of hearts are closed to the truth i harbor..... that dangerouse truth that could commit me to the place of my fears...... My beliefs are unrealistic to the point that i myself question everything.... Don't follow me... don't come near me.... for i might have to sever these ties when the time comes..... i wish not to hurt anyone... but this path i have taken..... requires me to sever ties that i create.... burn the bridges i have poured my blood upon while making........ My soul bleeds everytime i am reminded of how far, yet excrutiatingly close i am to the dream i have dreamt, what feels like... My entire life......... Images plague my mind, ..........voices through my head haunt me.... As they speak to me.... Am i insane?... Have i gone off the deep end for this dream that i can nearly claspe my hands around?...... Is that my fate?..... To be forever lost in the hope that i will find my home.... .that i will cross that one fine line and be where i belong?........ I know where it is..... i know what i must do to cross it..................
I must sacrifice everything....... everything............... everything.....
A harsh thing to do.... a very devestating thing to have to do if things don't go right........ But the fear holds me back... i must look past the fear and into what it is that i am searching for......... Even now my heart longs for it.. It ACHES for it....... as i cry again...... in agony.....It is worth it?..... More than what ll i'm losing here?.....................
yes my mind and my soul scream to the sky...
YES!! take me away!!!!!!!
But i have asked this for so long..... and then to find that they were scared to take me into their wings and hold me close..... A fear of me undoing myself and leaving them wounded and without me ..... pierced my heart...tenderly........ It's something i wished for ..... A death and rebirth ..unto itself...... ... And they felt scared and so in protecting against what they felt might happen they did not give me what i wished so readily........... But why don't they see?... that it is something i would die for?..... something that my whole life is based on.... i long for it....... will i get what i want?.... Will they give me my wish?........
I pray so...... for it means the world to me......
I must sacrifice everything....... everything............... everything.....
A harsh thing to do.... a very devestating thing to have to do if things don't go right........ But the fear holds me back... i must look past the fear and into what it is that i am searching for......... Even now my heart longs for it.. It ACHES for it....... as i cry again...... in agony.....It is worth it?..... More than what ll i'm losing here?.....................
yes my mind and my soul scream to the sky...
YES!! take me away!!!!!!!
But i have asked this for so long..... and then to find that they were scared to take me into their wings and hold me close..... A fear of me undoing myself and leaving them wounded and without me ..... pierced my heart...tenderly........ It's something i wished for ..... A death and rebirth ..unto itself...... ... And they felt scared and so in protecting against what they felt might happen they did not give me what i wished so readily........... But why don't they see?... that it is something i would die for?..... something that my whole life is based on.... i long for it....... will i get what i want?.... Will they give me my wish?........
I pray so...... for it means the world to me......
