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2:13 am 8/18/07

Today sucked a** again. stare I find inconcievable that some retards from gaia could just use OOC like it was some bashing tool for fun. whats worse they came from the battle arena and banned me twose. once on two different accounts. the owner proably doesnt even know. who cares. At least i have me friends online like john, lu and paul to back me up. Family life is ruff. money is at an all time low and i consider myself lucky to be able to be doing an online journal right now.

I got more info on me friend from the car wreck. he's fine for now. probably will have a perminant injury but will pull through. mad God I have that ******** feeling again. like some dark beast inside of me waunts out. waunting to be unchained. ******** me. Im a totall looser. sometimes i wonder how things ended up the way they did. Just as im about to get out of the hole problems come up. just when im about to reach for the light my own dark abyss pulls me back in agian. this sucks. Sitting in the same boat again. Sometimes i just look up at the stars and just wonder...will it ever get better? Will this crappy a** life ever lead to a better one? heh I ******** hate cristains.always telling me to pray to god and tryig to shove their s**t down my throat. not all do it but most. Magic..isint ******** iv;e seen enough s**t in my 23 years in this god givin hell hole. war is hell? how about you come to my mind and thoughts. hey lets take a trip down memory lane. lets see if you come out of this without waunting to peel your eyeballs out. i live my life in darkness and i strive to reach for that unobtainable light it seems. will it ever..will the light ever be obtainable? stare

fcuk the docs appointment is next friday, did gets paid next friday. and i'll be out of my meds. wonder if the doc's gonna b***h me out. im just lucky im on something to get me outta this nightmare. Is this reality of mine really a dream? When i die will i just wake up in the real earth?

just for laughs. see i have humore
it's 1 am. im an insomniac thats about to fall asleep for once in my messed up life. my meds are gone and im on the war path. plain and simple..Go To Hell. at this point im holding back as im tired of dealing with billigent a** hols like you. Just go jump off a bridge somewhear offline and make me feel happy. tell ya what go to those annonamos hackers and get them to ruin your world with the scary phone calls. Hey i bet you'd like having you'r comp hacked by them. Well then. im done ranting. I dont feel like wasting my time tearing this waistless puke of a. a** who has the I.Q. of jello and the brain capasity of a paramicium. (one celled organisim)

also lets go deeper in the rabbits hole tonight and see what we have. ahh a conversation about wookies. during a star wars pen and paper canpain me and two other talk about a codek(i that what it was call. might have been called a da. not sure) and the explodeing disks. lol. further going into deetail that it lands on a boss figure as it explodes, injuring him, and leading me to be court marshalled. unfortionantly on the last day they stick a horny wookie with blue balls in my cell. I get raped and while hes rapeing me he accidentally pulls me arms off. He gets pissed at himself and goes into a wookie rage. thus beeting me sinceless with me own arms. after being release i become a mute and spazz out near or around wookies. lol. it got pretty ******** up about the rapeing wookie thing. the cinversation lasted about 10-20 mins. our friend waslks in and asks what was so funny. as clueless as she was we just told her nothing.

funny phrases :
crammit cupcake
meat shield
bitchmuffens.

cool quote for the night.
history is much like an endless waltz. the three beats of war, peace, and revolution continue on forever. Thus like a downward spiral that is as endless as time itslef. A domino effect that will never end. In such we are mearly victems of this "domino effect"" ninja

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"Random Coment... You're orange. like an OopaLompa"