Shattered Glass
It was a cold dark morning in December, the kind of morning your absolutely hate to get out of bed. The sky was still its darkest as if the night was still there. Jamie opened her eyes to the blaring alarm and reached her hand over to slam down the snooze button. She hated morning at the best of times but today was the worse yet. She was so unhappy and depressed she never wanted to get out of bed anymore and today was no different. There was something different however, a strange tingling feeling running through her body. She decided to ignore the strange feeling and rolled over to catch another ten minutes sleep. As she drifted off the tingling in her body intensified. The strange feeling became so strong that Jamie could not ignore it and as she lifted her head from the pillow she saw the most amazing thing.
A sparkling blue light filled the room and Jamie wondered if she was dreaming. She squinted her eyes to focus clearly and as she did she heard a voice. As the voice became louder Jamie sat up and saw the most beautiful girl she had ever seen. The girl appeared to be about 13, the same age as Jamie. She had long, beautiful, curly, black hair that hung down her waist. Her skin was alabaster and had the look of fine porcelain. She had the most magnificent eyes, a shimmering deep violet color and her gaze seemed to look right through you. Jamie knew this girl was not from here she felt the girl was almost heavenly. The girl was dressed in an old fashioned heart shaped, bodice dress that laced up the front. The flowing gown of the dress moved like it was made of water. The colour morphed from midnight black at the bodice to pure white at the flowing edges. There was a red ribbon tied loosely next to her left ear and there appeared to be a slight breeze all around her causing her hair and dress to shimmer with the movement. “My name is Selene, I am here from beyond to tell you my story and assist you with your life journey. Please do not fear me for I mean you no harm,” said the beautiful girl.
Jamie had been unhappy for years. Her father had treated her horribly since she was around two or three years old. He was emotionally abusive and had told her repeatedly that she was useless and had no purpose and he never wanted a daughter in the first place he had always wanted a son. This made Jamie feel worthless and unloved, unnecessary and disposable. She should just disappear. No matter how often her mother told Jamie that these feelings were not true she still couldn’t shake the feeling of worthlessness and the world would be better off if she was gone. These feelings had been growing stronger as the years went by and most recently her father had disowned her and pushed her out of the his family for good. Her parents had divorced when she was 2 and her father’s abuse was ongoing since then as if he was punishing her because her mother left him. Jamie had become withdrawn and dark almost like her soul was dying. Her father had recently remarried and had a son, “see you really are worthless now I have a son and no need for you”! Perhaps that was why Selene had come.
Selene smiled as if she could read Jamie’s mind then she said, “let me show you my life to compare to yours so you may see how similar we are. Perhaps my pain can heal yours”. Selene lifted her arm and waved her hand across Jamie’s face and Jamie could feel her soul leaving her body and entering another realm. She should have felt terror at this moment but instead she felt safe and at home with what was happening. There was a tugging at her mind as her body lay down and her mind went elsewhere. Suddenly Jamie found herself lying in a bed not unlike her own but in a totally different room and a totally different season. The birds were chirping and the sun was shining indicating it was summer. She felt totally freaked out and jumped from the bed. She looked down and found herself in the nude so she hurried to the closet in search of clothes.
Rummaging through the closet she found all the clothes to be black. She pulled a long flowing skirt and tight fitting black tee-shirt from the closet and dressed. Finally dressed she set her mind to discovering where she was and why she was there. She looked around the room and found a dresser, vanity and large mirror. Walking slowly to the mirror she lifted her head and gazed upon her reflection. Surprisingly it was not her reflection she saw but the reflection of the girl, Selene she had seen in her room just moments ago. She was shocked; she was living Selene’s life!
The phone began ringing and Selene ran and grabbed the phone. Jamie was no longer in charge of the situation all she could do now was watch. Selene answered the phone and heard her father’s voice, a deep gruff voice that she knew all too well, “hello loser, finally out of bed”? Her father was always so mean and treated her so badly whenever her mother wasn’t around. He had begun treating her badly when she was around five, telling her how useless she was and how he wished she had never been born. As far back as she could remember she has felt worthless. He had told her that her mother felt the exact same way but she would never say it. Selene suffered her father’s abuse in silence. She believed his lies and never spoke to her mother about the situation. Selene was always unhappy and very rarely ever smiled. All she thought about was how she could leave this world. She was depressed and suicidal, a bad combination.
There was no one she could talk to and therefore she just didn’t talk. Her head hung low with all her shaggy black hair hanging in her face and all she ever wore was black. The world sucked! She wrote all her feelings in a small diary she kept with her at all times. When the diary wasn’t tucked under her arm she hid it in an old trunk in the attic. She had pulled the lining free from the side and would slip the book between the lining and the wall of the trunk. She was terrified of someone finding it; her whole life was in that book.
In the past year Selene’s father had become more and more abusive. Every time her mother was out he would attack her with negative comments and put downs. She had become increasingly depressed and all she wanted to do was sleep. Her skin had become very pale and she wasn’t eating. She would plan daily how she could end her worthless life and finally give her father the satisfaction that he obviously needed. Today was the day she had decided to end it all. She was going to commit suicide and not only make her father happy but she would finally be free of all the pain and sorrow she had felt over the past 13 years.
Jamie was shocked that all this was happening so quickly and she can’t do a thing to stop it. She is watching Selene’s life unfold before her eyes and now she will have to watch her die, but what does that mean for Jamie? Will she die too? She is in Selene’s body after all. Does she really even want to die?
Jamie is trapped inside Selene’s body screaming “you don’t have to do this, he isn’t worth it and there are people you can talk to. Don’t let him influence your life like this. You have the world to live for, love to experience, sunsets to see and a whole world to travel. There is so much more to life outside these four walls which you have trapped yourself inside. Maybe your mother truly loves you! Ask her. Tell her about your dad, she needs to know. She can help fix this, I promise”. All these wonderful words of wisdom were coming from Jamie. Suddenly she understood why Selene had brought her here. She was answering her own problems but how could she help Selene?
Selene had researched the best way to do it. She wanted it to be successful, a way she wouldn’t be able to back out when she panicked. All the internet sites said that everyone panics. Not this kid she would ensure the final product would be her death. She went to the large Victorian bathroom; it was a cheery room with a small round window and was painted a pretty yellow with white trim. It had an old fashioned clawed tub and a shell shaped pedestal sink. She filled the tub with warm water and returned to her bedroom to grab her small clock radio. Returning to the bathroom she set up the radio between the shiny silver taps and balanced it on the water spout. All the time this is happening Jamie is screaming for her to stop. Selene stepped into the tub fully clothed and settled in against the rounded back of the tub. She didn’t desire to be found naked in such a horrible situation. The suicide note written in her book may never be found but who cares nobody loves her anyway. She glances around the cheery room and smirks, ironic that such a happy room should be her death chamber. With that she lifts her foot and gently tossed the radio into the water.
Jamie jolts straight up in bed and gasps for air. She looks into the face of the beautiful young Selene and says, “but why, you had everything to live for”? “As do you”, young Selene whispers. “Now I have shown you my life, you must learn from my mistakes and allow me to share one more thing with you. I am your sister and the horrid man who hurt me is hurting you now. Our mother was pregnant with you at the time of my death. She has never understood why I did this and she never will unless you hand her my diary. It is in the old wooden trunk at the end of mother’s bed. Tear away the lining on the left side and you will find my little book the one that holds all my pain and sorrow. She needs to understand why and my diary will tell her. Don’t let this happen again and remember I love you”. With that the porcelain figure disappeared while one single tear rolled down Jamie’s cheek.
Jamie sprung from the bed and hurried to her mother’s room. Her mother lay sleeping in her flowery sheets and Jamie tore open the trunk and began ripping out the lining. All the noise awoke her mother, bewildered she lifted her head and asked, “what are you doing”?
Handing her the book she said, “I want to live mom and Selene wants you to know the truth”. Her mother took the book with trembling hands and flipped it open, tears streaming down her face and unto the pages. The long lost note from sweet Selene, holding her story was finally free. The first line of the note read; don’t let this happen to my baby sister! I will do anything to protect her from where I am. I only ever wanted you to love me so now please for my sake love my sweet sister…
![~[Wingless-Angel]~](https://a1cdn.gaiaonline.com/dress-up/avatar/ava/3a/65/38823b2a47653a.png?t=1230074666_6.00_11 "~[Wingless-Angel]~")
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