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I don't really make my journal entries special so don't expect flashy things and junk. I don't really care who reads this all, I just need something to do before I go nuts.

I'm not sure if I can keep up with some things. Everyone around me is using me like some tool or something. I'm not going to go into details of a certain person due to "social" reasons but one is my girlfriend. I feel that she uses me as an excuse to have a boyfriend. Like when someone asks her if she has a boyfriend she has the ability to say "yes" and answer anything else they ask about me. I know she has problems with doing things for me because of how she was raised and I guess I am getting tired of hearing that excuse. I mean I hear it all the time from most of my clients so it is something that is "played out" in my head. Maybe I am to fast? It seems that way. If I am too fast for her then I either have to slow down or leave her untill she gets my age or she speeds up. I know that's impossible though sad .