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Just day to day thoughts every now and then...
August 30/08
August is almost over and fall is coming.

The spiky shell encased chesnuts have started falling from the trees down the street, and every day I pass them I want to crack one open with my shoe and take the chesnut home. I used to collect them when I was little, I collected hundreds of them and piled them outside. Why? I have no idea, I suppose it seemed like fun, running all over looking for them and stuffing my pockets to the point where it was ridiculous.

The leaves on the trees have started to brown and become crispy, some of them are on the lawn already. I like crunching them with my shoe. And it's getting colder. It's not cold yet, but the days are not as unbearably hot and humid and there was a day last week I needed a hoodie just to keep warm (though, I didn't realize this until I was half way to my destination, so I didn't bother turning back).

And school is coming. Including today, I have three days left before I have to get on that bus early in the morning. Going back to school is bittersweet for me. I love to learn and I can't wait to get to my new classes, but I don't like most of the other students, in fact, I find them incredibly irritating and in some cases, offensive. I like having time away from home because it takes me out from under the thumbs of my family, but I'll miss being able to do pretty much whatever I want, whenever I want. Oh, and I hate buses, they're dirty, smelly and full of loud, annoying people.

But there's something about school that I look forward to that has no negative side. I look forward to seeing I friend of mine that I haven't seen in two months. He's just about the only real friend I have, and certainly the only person whom I trust completely. And I miss him a great deal. Generally, during school, we talk at least once a day, and I miss talking to him.

Going a little off topic for a moment, I am particularly annoyed with my little sister right now. She represents many of the things I despise, but what bothers me most is not her lack of self-discipline, rather, her lack of understanding in the fact that self-discipline is a trait to be admired and developed. She thinks it worthless, and that she can just do whetever she wants.

She has this attitude with everything, school included. I will NOT be helping her with her math this year. She can buck up and do it herself or ask the teacher for help, and if she fails it's not my problem. I'm not her academic slave. I'm kind of ashamed to admit this, but part of me hopes she will fail, not only so that she might learn a greater lesson, but so that I will get some satisfaction, because she deserves to fail. She needs to learn that other people won't take care of everything for you forever.

But anyways, we'll see what happens this fall. With school and my grading approaching, I'm going to be quite busy. Honestly, the grading is more important to me than school is, and I know my teachers wouldn't want that to be true, but it is. Martial arts is priority.





 
 
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