Jan 27 2020
I feel like this is almost becoming a dream journal, last night I had one I wanted to get down. Its getting real hazy but it was sort of important. Forgive the near stream of conciousness that follows.
So I had left on my trip and stayed the first night apparently in Cali at Pastor Jack's house (family friend) and met up with Nate (friend from hs) who wasn't really pleased to see me. The previous night was black and blue with green foliage on the side of the road lit yellow at the base by my headlights. The next day was grey, red, green and blue, 00s Ps2 style, Tony hawk, santa monica, Los Angeles. My dad picked me up to get my car in a 00s mustang black and red, little green, 80s casino. We drove around the roundabout to pick up my car before it got a ticket. That was it. Though somewhere on the timeline i was at a store, pretty Los Angeles but also icecream supply store Q4. Lots of coolers, kinda famima. They got mad at my group and packed up and left leaving the store empty. The key part was the feeling. It felt like summer, like white tile, yellow paint, blue clear plastic trays in the shade, and lemon lime.
So for those of you wondering what the ******** that was. Basically the most important parts of the dream were the feelings, rather than events, but since the feelings are unique and complex I don't really have words to describe them. I default to listing objects that the I associate the feelings with. Incidentally what you just read was a sample of how my inner monologue talks. I tried to fill in extra words and explanations for clarity... the unfiltered version is more compressed.
Companionship or the lack there of, was a central theme. I have friends, even some good ones but real bonds are few. It's also strange that our society seems to stigmatize loneliness. Someone saying they're sad gets met with sympathy someone saying they're lonely get met with pity. Seems crazy since companionship is such a basic need.
My dad has shown up in dreams before, interestingly I think he only showed up a handful of times before he died. After he's been there enough times to be noticeable. It's kind of nice that he lives on in my dreams offering aid and advice. If I were a more spiritual person I would think that there might be something to it. Side note I also seem to have picked up some of his speech patterns since his death. Perhaps its a parting gift.
Jesus ******** that was a rant. I'm gonna have fun re reading this later.
all_winters_eve · Tue Jan 28, 2020 @ 02:36am · 0 Comments |