• People complain about snow,
    They say that it’s cold and too wet.
    They whine about freezing their socks off,
    Yet I’m in Vegas placing a bet.

    If you don’t like the cold then just leave it,
    Catch the first plane that goes by,
    Preferably to some place quite sunny,
    And with cuties who can catch your eye.

    My family back home trims the tree,
    While the dealer is cutting the deck,
    Let others worry about the holidays,
    I’m no emotional wreck.

    My gifts were all wrapped up at MACY’S
    And I had them delivered by plane
    They promised me next day delivery,
    Which is great because I can’t delay.

    If those kids don’t get their presents
    They cry and throw out their plush.
    Oops I’ll have to leave you,
    I just got a royal flush!

    So as I was saying this season
    Send your gifts from afar
    Let children break toys they’ve just opened
    While you drive a sweet rental car

    Now don’t get me wrong about family
    I love them, really I do.
    But none of us can stand the others
    It’s the honest but horrible truth.

    So I bought a ticket to Vegas
    And cashed in last months paycheck
    I’m hoping to hit it big here
    Or I’ll be in Holiday debt!