• The freezing rain slapped Reverdy's pale face. She lay in the cold, wet grass, face to the clouds. The rain had slowed down and picked up numerous in the last six hours, and Reverdy had been chanting, "No, John. No, John. No, John." over and over. Her long white fingers clawed and pulled at the mushy terrain in distress. It was dark and bleak outside, Reverdy unaware of the time at all. She didn't much mind. Her brain was fried and she never slept. She was one hundred percent oblivious to anything around her. For all she knew (or, in her case, didn't know), it wasn't raining at all. Maybe it was sunny, maybe John was right next to her, telling her she was okay. Maybe she was dead and damned to Hell. This was just God's way of punishing her--for whatever she did. Reverdy didn't even know. She had tried to go to Church every Sunday morning, she had been baptized, she even attended every communion since she was seven years old. Okay, so the damnation to Hell was out of the way. Reverdy was definitely not physically dead, but she was on the inside.
    Suddenly, another flashback charged through her mind, quivering and shaking her spine violently.

    John laced his fingers in mine as we strolled down the park's sidewalk. We walked his dog, Kelly, a golden retriever puppy. She was a little puffy ball of craziness that day. Jumping every place and biting at the infertile leash. That was the one thing I would never do to my dog (if I had one): put it on a leash. Who wants to be pulled on a leash?! Not me, and not the dogs. The poor thing.
    That day I had been very pensive. I had thought thoroughly about really changing my name. Because, frankly, I was tired of it. Reverdy. Ew. That just made me scowl every time I said or heard it. Reverdy Annemarie Van Harlen. Ew! It was much too "goody-two-shoes" for my totally not goody-two-shoes ways. I was a hip-hop dancer for Lord's sake! That was not a name fit for me. Although, I didn't even know what I would change it to. Maybe I would change it to Revy. Just Revy. My last name will be different anyway pretty soon, so there was no need to change that part of my name. Maybe I could make a new stage name, too! My current stage name had been Alice Michelangelo at the time. It was totally made up and random, I just liked the sound of it. I turned my head to see John looking at me in confusion. I guess I had stopped walking, I was so deep in thought. "What?" I said, zoning back in. He smirked, "What are you thinking about?" he wondered.
    "Nothing, nothing. It was nothing."
    "Come on, tell me!" he poked my side, something he did when I was keeping something from him.
    "My name. There."
    His eyes turned cold. He dropped my hand and looked over my head at something unknown. "You will never change it. It's part of who you are. You were born unto it, and that is how it will stay. Reverdy," I flinched, he practically spat the word out. It sounded even worse that way. "Be thankful that you have a real name. Think of the Holocaust people! They had their names stripped away from them, and they were changed to numbers. Numbers, Reverdy. They can't even be remembered because no one will ever know what their true identity. And slaves! They were named what slave traders ended up naming them. Why would anyone ever want to change their identity?! Not me. And I won't you either." he whipped his head towards Kelly, and whistled to her. "Let's go." he said in a low, dark tone. As he began to walk away, all I could do was wonder what had set him off. I shrugged and soon caught up with him. "I'm sorry." was the last thing I had said to him the rest of the day...


    Reverdy quavered in a fetal position. She screamed and cried, "John! John!" she had realized that he wrists were bleeding immensely. She must've scratched herself too hard again. She did this when she had an all too familiar flashback. She sat up and chuckled darkly to herself. "He knew all along what would happen to me. How ******** up I would turn out. And not just me, the WHOLE WORLD!!!!" She stood up and shouted to the imaginary person (John) that was standing in front of her. "You knew it all along, John! You knew that the world would collapse in a mere second. And you did nothing to stop it! I was beautiful, and talented, and then you had to go and make me the ugliest person alive because of selfishness! GO TO HELL!" she fell on her knees, and then strait down to her face. For the first time in three years, she had fallen asleep.