• pain and sorrow
    consume my heart
    filling my head with evil thoughts
    wanting them to go away
    i make the wrong choices
    desperate moves
    envying others
    for what they have
    but not yet self-pity
    degrading myself for me
    feeling the pain it brings
    and the joy to others
    my happiness doesnt matter
    is the last important thing
    me and myself
    are not important
    but others are
    not wanting help from others
    no matter what
    but being so waek
    people abuse me
    and i let it go
    without carring
    as long as they are happy
    and i'm not
    thats all that matters
    depression and playfulness
    dont mix
    espeacially with grumpy people
    i only end up more depressed
    more pain
    not feeling needed
    no matter what anyone says
    my mind is made up
    no one needs me
    or wants me
    my life has no point
    as much as it pains me
    i except the fact
    that i am hated
    by everyone
    the ones who dont
    they pretend and in the end
    it only brings me pain
    as much as i want it to end
    i know it wont
    all i want
    is to be loved and wanted
    which is too much
    but i know it wont happen
    just cause my life stinks
    although its not as bad as some
    it stilll stinks
    i want to be normal
    but that will never happen
    i was born this way and raised
    theres no going back
    im doomed
    to follow the path
    the path that was chosen for me
    even if i dont want it
    i have it
    and people shun me for it
    hate me
    want me dead
    and that helps alot
    with low confidense
    and self esteem
    it only makes it worse
    now when i want help
    i cannot get it
    for no one would ever help me
    only take advantage of me
    which hurts
    like a knife through the heart
    enternally i bleed
    while externally
    im happy and childish
    for a sense of false emotions
    but getting in trouble for it
    and with that
    comes more hatred
    so whatever i do
    i am hated for it
    so why i live
    unwanting to still do
    out of selflessness
    which only bite me back
    for no reason
    i wish to be happy
    not a false happiness
    but real happiness
    and to live happily ever after
    for the rest of eternity