When Will it End

• Artist: Summer_Love0015
• Description: I don't know why I did this... I guess because I just got done with a scary movie!
  I hope you guys like it... Hehe... Plz no hate comnets! But if u dnt like it just tell me to delet it!!! :sweat:
• Date: 12/23/2008
• Tags: will

The Killer
Asked me for my wallet
"I am not playing any games" the killer told me
I was so much in shock I tried to run
instead I triped
He beat me up
"I told you I wasn't playing... All I asked for was your wallet!" the killer said
I was screaming
I was in pain
I died.

Comments

[AryanKreep]

yes yes the short speech and staccato transitions. All add to the drama. Comment for comment? 5/5

[Summer_Love0015]

dmaticic I only did that because it ment the idea of instance death or something you know?

[dmaticic]

I really like the concept, and your language is not bad. The only negative thing I could say would be about the last 3 lines. All though I love the idea, your transition is, if nothing else, a little weak. But that is just opinion!