Distress

• Artist: Zira361
• Description: it's a couplet i did at school for english. It's only 3 stanzas (if i spelled that wrong, pease tell me) but i think it's ok for my first poem =3
  Plz tell me what might i need to improve on and give me advice for writing poems =D (btw u can't understand u can message me and i'll give u a hint and anyone who can guess the meaning i wrote it for get a free...something who cares it's free =D)
• Date: 03/12/2009
• Tags: couplet school evil hell glares

Pacing up and down the stairs
I passed by those evil glares

Demons eating the souls of friends
Hell is where each day they'll spend

But if I don't tell them, then they won't know
About what the greatest evil might bestow

Comments

[KingAbukura]

I like it, short and easy to understand. Though the name doesn't really relate to the poem in my mind, might to others but try better names; poems and stories and the like are useally named after they're done, sometimes even weeks after it. I give it a 4.

[one rate-1]

this is short but well writen 5/5

[ArashiKunX]

i like it