• My thoughts caress my life span with a knife. Taking over, there is certainly not enough room to concentrate. Love, hatred, the end.

    I wait and wait for my goth knight to save me from myself, this nightmare I have created of my own free will. My hopes and dreams have gotten in the way and now there is no exit, no possible way out. I can feel everything suffocating me, pressing down on my lungs clenching my throat.

    It hurts, everything hurts. A wild imagination comes with so much pain and greif, I would never wish this curse upon anyone. Crazy thoughts, insane dreams, putting me on the edge with a kinfe at my back, forcing me to fall.

    He comes for me in the night – possibly when I’m walking home with no one around, completely alone. Not even a car on the street.

    Maybe he even whispers to me from somewhere I can’t see, tells me he knows of the pain I suffer from, and that he’s here to save me, my gothic knight.

    How I just want a love, a dark master that I can wear around my neck and I can be worn around his. A secret so tempting, so mysterious and bright and shining with black. Strong and weak laced up with roses. A present that I can open up time after time and it will still have the morning of christmas feel.

    Save me from the massive devil eating my flesh and carving my bone, pinching my heart with thorns from the roses with which you were laced with, shredding me with rusted barbwire, killing my spirit, stabbing it with splintered rods of wood.

    This mass of clouds is now blocking my thoughts, leading me to be brain dead. Protecting me? Or shredding my last will to hope. . .

    Let go of it all, let yourslef fall. Crash, bang, head trauma, a broken limb, deep wounds, death. I no longer want to live with this sorrow, the wanting to die is like the wanting to sniff up the cocaine and be happy for those few hours, and keep on snorting whenever you feel it wearing off. That’s how much I want to die, I could tear my skin off layer by layer and find the enjoyment in all the blood and the veins and muscle. It’s this constant headache burning my eyes.

    Take me in, cuddle me, hold me, kiss me and sweep me off my feet. Pick me up and lift me to the moon while I look down upon your pale white skin in total awe,
    Put me down so I can look up to you like a god while you dominate me, push me onto the cold green earth with a passion burning so deep in your eyes. Your hair sweeps on and all over my chest, that soft hair that somehow carries a flame.

    Take me into the night.