Why is it I that always get's it?
A cruel joke by those 'meaning well?'
A sham to drag me out of nesting?
To get away I hid myself in the darkness, all alone
The last refuge
But even it couldn't shield me
I was tormented, i died inside
Why aren't I the one that everyone wants to know?
I have a good life, good parents, great stuff
But in truth, they are material & cannot satisfy me
I beg for friends, love & a life
But until then i hide away, no-one can see me here
Though I can't hide here in the darkness forever
I lust to come out & become social
I just can't go out & face society though
I have scars from my last battle with it
Not physical but mental scars, pressed deep into my head
The constant battle in which I took part
The pain that I felt, real pain
Not the pain of losing a lover to another
The pain was real, it still hurts me years later
It isn't the injury I could face that scares me
But more the reality of it
If anyone is out there, I beg for help
A call that is ignored, like little kids ignore a danger sign
It is there, but isn't looked at, merely thrown to one side
I am left aloe in a cavern of sorrow, a cave of self pity
My mere voice calls out for help
& it echoes, why me? why me?
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