• It ain't an easy life
    Taming this giant beast
    It's not as stupid as you think
    IQ of 90 at least

    Poor Rolf lost a finger to It
    And Sam lost a toe to It
    Me? I lost an eye
    Just had it plucked by It

    It's a psycho in fur
    It's as vicious as a cur
    It's as strong as steel
    And it wants you to peel

    I don't know anyone whose beaten It
    I don't know anyone whose survived It
    Rolf, Sam, and me were lucky
    That there were bars between It and Bucky

    Bucky was tryin' to feed It
    Just a small apple pit
    But he put his arm out rather then put it on a sharp pin
    And It broke the bars and pulled him in

    We're lucky It couldn't get through the bars
    But we were sad it took Bucky
    He was too kind to have to die
    To this day I look up and ask "Why?!"

    It's a psycho in fur
    It's as vicious as a cur
    It's as strong as steel
    And it wants you to peel

    Well Rolf forgot to fix the bars
    So they rusted to the core
    Last time we saw Rolf - or what we saw of Rolf
    Was his severed head, with a deep tore

    So me and Sam were left
    And I asked Sam was this worth it?
    We kept the monster because of gold
    That would spring whenever it would eat an apple pit

    That's why Bucky got caught
    He wanted a little gold
    So he could get us some new equipment
    For the bars' growing mold

    Sam got angry
    Thinkin' I wanted his gold
    Don't really know why
    But he ran to find his goal

    All I heard was a scream
    Erupting from that dark cage
    Then I heard the gate open
    I knew the bars were aged

    Well here I am
    All alone in the dark
    It will only be a matter of time
    Before It gets m-

    It's a psycho in fur
    It's as vicious as a cur
    It's as strong as steel
    and it wants you to peel