• Fury
    Red-hot, white-hot
    Black
    Vision blurry
    Is that the tears?
    I don’t care now
    I see the blade, shining bright against my skin
    I press
    My skin doesn’t break
    I press harder
    Still no blood
    I shake
    I drop the scissors
    I look to my art kit
    There’s a blade in there, I know
    I wanna use it
    I want…
    NO
    I lock myself in the bathroom, text a friend
    Tell her how I feel
    Parents across the hall
    Would they notice if I died?
    Maybe
    Can I do it?
    No. I’m a coward
    Return to my room
    See silver
    Kick the scissors away
    Still silver
    My sewing needle
    Dull
    Take it in my trembling fingers
    Tears run down my face
    Drag the needle over skin
    Twice
    Thrice…
    Throw it down
    Grab my computer
    Type this verse
    Am I still sane?
    Thinking…the pills, the blades, the insulin
    I could slip away
    Too scared to
    Save me from me…