Random Poem of Boredom #2

• Artist: Marwolaeth o Angylion
• Description: Another random poem I wrote when I was bored.
• Date: 03/14/2012
• Tags: random poem boredom

My heart breaks your hair is filled with snakes
Your silver tongue has guided me
But my family chided me
I should have never trusted
And now my mind is busted
My heart os broken
So take this token
Of my rage and hate
Nothing can equate
The way I feel, the way I see
And now it's just you and me
Take a step back and your falling
Like me you are bawling
But my face is filled with laughter
I'll laugh and laugh even after
So your eyes close
And my tears like a hose
I say goodbye.
but I cannot die.

Comments

[Marwolaeth o Angylion]

I know it doesn't make much sense, but really who cares? Who cares what words I use as long as I approve of my own work. That's what matters so I really don't give a damn what you give it.

[Lorem Corpus]

You use some interesting vocabulary in there, but a lot of it doesn't make sense/sound good. Tears like a hose? Really? And although I applaude you for finding rhymes, those words don't really belong with the mood...I mean, I giggled when you said bawling and chided. And equate. I give it a 2/5.