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It began in solitude and isolation, not the skin on my back wanted to bear the burden of accompanying me on this long journey through the seemingly Hell. My life bound only by the most painful wounds, ones that were thought to never heal. Dreaded memories and dreams passed through my head when it came time to sleep, so I did my best to avoid this time. I drowned myself in artificial emotions and willingly tied myself to nothing but an 'imaginary' friend. Literature became a way for me to pass the time; time that was most unwanted and unwelcomed to me. I prayed everynight, that perhaps there wouldnt be a morning for me to wake up to. I wanted nothing but to slip into non-existence. I wanted a form of serenity, and I wanted it only for myself. I had no true desire to be physically attached to anybody, I lived in fear of everyone and everything, I did my best to seclude myself from all of my surroundings. I hid all emotions and interacted with no one, I sliped deeper and deeper, and became desperate for some kind of affection, but never received it. Nobody once thought to tell me they loved me, or hug me gently. I turned to the worst of all things and ultimately caused myself to collapse. 'It's always darkest before dawn,' the wisest thing anyone has ever told me. It kept me going, I constantly looked for new opportunities, but none ever came. I spent years without any trace of love or compassion. I tried my damnest to keep my life in order; but I was greatly flawed. I never told anybody, it was too embarrassing and I, too ashamed. Just as I thought i had to end everything, I was drawn in by someone who's intentions were unknown. He intrigued, a sort of mysteriousness about him. Everyday I awoke wanting to find out more, what exactly it was that makes him so calm and comforting. I became very inquisitive, in order to gain knowledge about him. He talked to me for hours on end, talked as if there was nothing better he could be doing. His hair always draped across his face, making it impossible for me to look into both his eyes and figure out what he was thinking. I wanted to be able to read him like a book, see if he was just as interested in me, as I of him. I didn't want to drop any hints, I was already tired of feeling vulnerable and very much alone. I was completely incapable of feeling affection, as no one had ever had the impulse to comfort me. So I tried confiding in him, trusted him with my deepest of secrets.... not a soul did he tell. I learned I could fully trust him with anything that was on my mind. But I dared not tell him I longed for his touch. Many thoughts crossed my head about what could potentially go wrong. I stopped myself from falling into your embrace everytime we were together, I avoided any situation where we may have touched, in fear of wanting more. I bottled up all my feelings in order to become closer with you. I was quite good at keeping my feelings for you on the backburner; until the day you held my hand. The warmth of your skin, and your calming touch caused my heart to race. I had waited for so long for you to make your move, and when you had I could not get enough. I went crazy for you and no longer felt fear. You made me feel safe in the time I needed it most. We have come so far, and I have gained the sweetest of memories created only by you. I devote my entire life to you, for you have shown me what it's like to feel again. You are my love, my happiness, the only one whom fits so perfectly in my heart. A life that started off so dark, has turned to nothing but light. You caused that light to shine down on me, and I want you to know that I truley love you. You are the one whom I was fated to be with. You bring me eternal happiness, and with you I must stay. For as long as I have you, I will never hurt again.
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