What is it that drives so many to believe that they can be with someone. What creates that imbalance in the mind to falsely believe that they are in love. Is it the clouds of perfume and cologne in the air, is it the charm shown and the respect displayed. How do you connect one to one, and two to two. Does it come from within or from an outside source. The felling of love is a tricky sense. Some say that love can be felt miles away some say that love isn't a feeling its and ability, some say love is horrible and never to be taken lightly. My own opinion is that love is an ability not a feeling. many people are able to love, only some feel love.
But their is no way of defining love really. But see it in the minds of many and notice how many forms love can and does change into. im more or less in a tight situation. To see how far life can take you. To watch your own life fall further and further into its own abyss of treacherous bounds and law less lines to never be crossed. its s shame to want your own death and to see the ones you cared for run the distance more and more deeper in the world away from you. To notice your own self alone is a pity in itself, but to stair and wonder in the minds and float in the eyes of the ones you held accountable to your feelings and well being not care is hell itself. Im sorry to feel and see and know that the one person I love will never be mine.
I will never be happy, and neither will you, you yourself will not be truly happy in your life, why I havent the slightest clue why, but its that same old why that creates pain and stress for even the strongest of men and women. And this is known that no one will be happy all the time for the rest of their lives, and those people will and do find ways to coupe with these frustrations. But to see yourself fall into the ever changing labyrinth we call the human mind is a scary place to be. Trust me on this, and the only way to make sense of things is to adhere to the pain and the understanding that you are lost and you need a hand to help you through the darkness. But i havent that hand to hold I havent that stability to feel my friend, girl, lover. im completely and utterly alone and im crying out in my own mind for help. I need her and she's gone, I needed her and she's gone. I need someone and no ones there. But I truly do feel loneliness. And I figured once you have experienced something of any magnitude that life should help you out or if anything lift the weight off any mans shoulder.
I really am struggling to see the brighter side of the pain I have gone through. But when I read over what I have written, I feel like Im bitching and moaning about little things that will blow over in a week or so, and it makes me wonder how far it is that i can go with the ups and downs that I dwell on from my past. From a real friend of mine he told me to let go of the past an forget about what has happened already, cause there aint s**t I can do about it. He told me that and i didnt listen, and now for my ignorance i am paying for it in full, I am suffering in my past and its making my future a living hell. "Good thing i like it Hot" but I cant feel the joyous breeze of the winter air, or the soothing warmth of the suns heat, I cant touch the one i love and be satisfied even when i meet eyes with her, " if that ever happens again" I dont feel the self-satisfaction that I felt when I held her hand in mine. Im a broken dream that was never pleasant, I will never be happy as I was, and im prepared to take to consequences once again. Can yo believe that I would have given my life for her, I would have died for her.
But I was born for this, I was born to be hurt so that others can feel nothing but unbridled joy and happiness. At least thats the best I could come up with for my meaning less existence.
Pathetic isnt it, a man feeding on his own emotions, hating himself for the problems that go on in his life, This would help if he had somebody to love.
+ - +X Apathetically Heartless **Stupid** X+ - +
But their is no way of defining love really. But see it in the minds of many and notice how many forms love can and does change into. im more or less in a tight situation. To see how far life can take you. To watch your own life fall further and further into its own abyss of treacherous bounds and law less lines to never be crossed. its s shame to want your own death and to see the ones you cared for run the distance more and more deeper in the world away from you. To notice your own self alone is a pity in itself, but to stair and wonder in the minds and float in the eyes of the ones you held accountable to your feelings and well being not care is hell itself. Im sorry to feel and see and know that the one person I love will never be mine.
I will never be happy, and neither will you, you yourself will not be truly happy in your life, why I havent the slightest clue why, but its that same old why that creates pain and stress for even the strongest of men and women. And this is known that no one will be happy all the time for the rest of their lives, and those people will and do find ways to coupe with these frustrations. But to see yourself fall into the ever changing labyrinth we call the human mind is a scary place to be. Trust me on this, and the only way to make sense of things is to adhere to the pain and the understanding that you are lost and you need a hand to help you through the darkness. But i havent that hand to hold I havent that stability to feel my friend, girl, lover. im completely and utterly alone and im crying out in my own mind for help. I need her and she's gone, I needed her and she's gone. I need someone and no ones there. But I truly do feel loneliness. And I figured once you have experienced something of any magnitude that life should help you out or if anything lift the weight off any mans shoulder.
I really am struggling to see the brighter side of the pain I have gone through. But when I read over what I have written, I feel like Im bitching and moaning about little things that will blow over in a week or so, and it makes me wonder how far it is that i can go with the ups and downs that I dwell on from my past. From a real friend of mine he told me to let go of the past an forget about what has happened already, cause there aint s**t I can do about it. He told me that and i didnt listen, and now for my ignorance i am paying for it in full, I am suffering in my past and its making my future a living hell. "Good thing i like it Hot" but I cant feel the joyous breeze of the winter air, or the soothing warmth of the suns heat, I cant touch the one i love and be satisfied even when i meet eyes with her, " if that ever happens again" I dont feel the self-satisfaction that I felt when I held her hand in mine. Im a broken dream that was never pleasant, I will never be happy as I was, and im prepared to take to consequences once again. Can yo believe that I would have given my life for her, I would have died for her.
But I was born for this, I was born to be hurt so that others can feel nothing but unbridled joy and happiness. At least thats the best I could come up with for my meaning less existence.
Pathetic isnt it, a man feeding on his own emotions, hating himself for the problems that go on in his life, This would help if he had somebody to love.
+ - +X Apathetically Heartless **Stupid** X+ - +
