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new poem heya ppl, finished another emo poem. goes along with "Helena" by My Chemical Romance Endless Nights by Crissy K There you go. How they hurt, truths, Where's my way out again? In shards.... My view of you. Burning up, this pain that Latches on to Obliterate The lives Of everyone you screwed. Crashed to the ground, I break, From all your damn mistakes. Left on my own, insane, What kept me whole is gone tonight. Why'd it all turn out this way? Broke us all, led us astray. So gone and this night's So long, endless nights. Shamed my life, With every scar You've brought me to tears again. This harm, The very hurt you sewed. Left all alone, I ache. It's just too much to take. These wounds hurt more each day. Can't look at you, be gone tonight. Why'd it all turn out this way? Broke us all, led us astray. So gone and this night's So long, endless nights. Well if you carry on this way, Things aren't better if you stay. Its wrong but what's right On long endless nights. Can you hear me? Are you near me? Let's find an end Where you have been forgiven, Where both our scars subside. Why'd it all turn out this way? Broke us all, led us astray. So gone and this night's So long, endless nights. Well if you carry on this way, Things aren't better if you stay. Its wrong but what's right On long endless nights.

Posted by: ace_smith Tue Jun 13, 2006 @ 02:26pm

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3m0ness
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:08pm


	:O "left on my own, insane" So your name is Crissy K? I've never heard Helena. Also, I think it's kind of weird how your poem has a chorus. I guess if you want it to go with a song, you'd have to, but... :/

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:12pm

Robo Bunny
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Zaruke
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:52pm


	Hmmmm..quite interesting. I like it. I'm fond of gloomy poems and such. Let me know what you think of this. Im in my room with the door locked and shut Trying hard to stitch together my cuts I once was numb, thought I never would feel My wounds are deep can you help me heal? To my darkened world you shed some light Your voice always takes away my plight I Lept into the light just for you Depite a unpleasent thought or two I suffer constantly from inner torment But for you I'll keep it dormant Memories for others seem to bring joy But to this person they only destroy Dont be sad for me because I'm still alive And the reason is you, you're what helps me survive It's real old, wrote it for my 1st girlfriend and I don't really write nice stuff anymore.

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:56pm


	commenting backwards This one is a bit harder to follow than the last. The "emo" is easy to pick out, but unlike the last one the theme here is a little harder to latch on to. I really like the rythmn of Quote: can you hear me? are you near me? let's find an end where you have been forgiven where both our scars subside and how it gives the possibility of hope...

Cryllia
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RottingCorpse
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:26pm


	" I break from all your damn mistakes " Wow I really love that line. I love the Helena song and the way you've changed it makes it better!

Commented on: Sat Aug 19, 2006 @ 07:12pm


	I am thoroughly in love with your creative idea of taking a song from The Band I Worship My Chemical Romance and incorporating your own interpretations into the grand scheme. Some things I really enjoyed in this poem are how the rhymes aren't blatantly displayed. They are conveyed subtly, but enough to be cleverly sensed throughout the poem's entire spew. I also really admired how you were able to describe the depth of the pain so vividly and you avoided the use of generic words. its wrong but what's right on long endless nights This line was the one that really got to me. I could just imagine how things in their relationship had gone so painfully and chaotically awry; everything became so jaded and warped that it was impossible to salvage anything good anymore. It was inpossible to see a silver lining on the dark storms that had clouded over their connection. I think it was great for you to end the poem on this line because it really sums things up neatly, but there's still that element of pain that comes to sting you. The only criticism I would really give you is that perhaps you should capitalize the beginning of each new sentence or thought. I wouldn't say you have to go so far as punctuating, though, because I kind of like how it flows without any periods or question marks to disrupt the path.

Elsewise
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