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Tell Me Why You Won't Let Go by Crissy K (written July 28, 2006) Can't see what lights were guiding me. I look and find the scars all burning through Unchanging crimes that could have changed into what we want. Its fine, salvation was just a passing thought. It was just a passing thought. Just wait, right now this sensation of love won't last long. We've only this chance to save the path we're on. It shows, all these morbid dying stings not talked about, And with time I'll block them out, And in time I'll block them out. Can't believe that its possible to breath. I just see how impossible Cries for remorse you hear, They mean nothing to what You think isn't wrong. Tell me why you won't let go. Tell me why you won't let go. Can't brood, what was once lovely isn't, And all these people Weep while telling me, They know my frets And what i've been frightened of. They've all but guessed how wrong, They know nothing about us. They know nothing about us. Can't believe that its possible to breath. I just see how impossible Cries for remorse you hear, They mean nothing to what You think isn't wrong. Tell me why you won't let go. Tell me why you won't let go. I'm not alright. Too scarred from fright. I'm not alright, No not this night. Can't believe that its possible to breath. I just see how impossible Cries for remorse you hear, They mean nothing to what You think isn't wrong, Tell me why you won't let go. Can't believe that its possible to breath. I just see how impossible Cries for remorse you hear, They mean nothing to what You think isn't wrong. Tell me why you won't let go. Tell me why you won't let go. What should be something beautiful, Confines our love into nothing wonderful. These times are rough, i know, Til the pull of what i cant forget let's go.

Posted by: ace_smith Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:12pm

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Robo Bunny
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:13pm


	crying you are such a talented poet...........

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:36pm


	That's a beautifully disturbing and achingly wrenching poem. I love the subdued feelings of desperation and suffocation. And it's so sad and bitingly pathetic how other people think they know what a person is going through and when they try to help, they're really only binding the person down even further. I am enamored with this poem and think it is delightfully and sorrowful and wretched. Very good work. Your poem was marvelous so I don't see why you're journal is entitled "My Crap".

Elsewise
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Cryllia
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:40pm


	This is a rather distrubing echo of my own thoughs on occasion. Maybe work with some punctuation though? Caps and periods could really tighten this down...

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:43pm


	wow...i wish i had the patiance to do that....i can sorta write...but its not my best attribute...but that was just positivly beautiful

a_4th_French
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Zaruke
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 10:45pm


	That is quite elegant and well worded in my opinion. Quite good though some things should be capitalized, but I won't be nitpicky. I'll send you one of my songs or poems sometime and we can have some creative discussion and critique each other! biggrin

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:02pm


	I really like this poem. I see a lot of poems and most are ruined with every second line constantly rhyming with the first, your poem has nice subtle rhymes here and there that doesn't make it overpowering. I would say they are more like lyrics than a poem but they are very nice. Some advice: like previously mentioned some punctuation would really make the poem stand out more. Very good work♪♪

RottingCorpse
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Ritsuka Sky
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:23pm


	that was beautiful! i tried to write poems a while ago. this has inspired me to continue.

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:27pm


	Surprisingly good poetry ^^ It's almost like a song. You could probably put a tune to it easily. It's definitely someone one can relate to. heart

Neppa Didier
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Araiion
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:30pm


	It's a pretty good poem, but you should remove the repeating lines. Repeating line = song. ):

Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:34pm


	... Mm... I'll comment while reading... I so have to comment on at least some of your other poems once I'm done this one too, you apparently like comments and you're too nice to not give them XD . Mm... sounds like it'd probably be a song. I'm not much into reading song lyrics unless I've heard the tune, so that sucks, huh XD ? I'm no good at commenting by the way. ...Mm... confusing, I must say @_@ . They meant it when they said your poems were vague, huh? XD I'm one that likes plotlines, I like the grounding it gives. Otherwise, I get totally lost. I suck like that XD . For some reason I like this line: it shows, all these morbid dying stings not talked about It's so very... hm, I dunno', but the way you worded it is interesting, and stuck in my head a bit. 'morbid dying stings not talked about'... Reminds me of bees... lots of angry, evil bees... How weird is that? The... fourth paragraph thingy? I like that one, it gave me good visionary, it was interesting and caught my attention for a good moment... made me take a moment to imagine it ^^ . But this poem really is confusing to me, I ish so lost @_@ . I like the ending too, I dunno' why but it seemed to tie the poem up nicely... weird... since I don't understand very well half of it XP . Mm, it really is similar to song lyrics though ^_^ . <3 Ali

Ali Myrrh Kim
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Jolkster
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Commented on: Fri Aug 18, 2006 @ 11:39pm


	I like the 2nd verse the best heart

Commented on: Sat Aug 19, 2006 @ 01:01am


	It tells of a person who's been suffering throughout life, all the descriptive words add to the effect of darkness, pain and sorrow. the poem would give many people shivers but I think that it shows what really happens through the road we call "life" (I know it's corny but I really felt that way through the poem)

Ryosuke_fc
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The Anesthesia
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Commented on: Thu Aug 24, 2006 @ 07:50pm


	Ace-chan, how can you leave? I know gaia isn't the best place in the world, but I just got back and I come to see that you are leaving, that isn't very cool. But...I guess I can't stop you, you remember my AIM name and my email address, betty.webb@gmail.com if you ever wanna talk. But just so you know...you are a great poet and here is what I have to say. Slip Away Please let me slip away until I am ready to find you again. But how do I know when I return you will be waiting. Am I even worth the pain that you have felt. Ebb and flow Our love blossoms but then dies away. I let you slip away into the darkness of my own fear. I now I have lost you forever, Slip away You were all I had but now you are gone. And I never had a chance how wonderful you were. I love you even if I let you slip away. Mew, what do you think? Anyhow, don't be a stranger, I love you...take care.

Commented on: Fri Jul 04, 2008 @ 04:01am


	wow i wanna write like that! 3nodding

Abyssal Rose
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