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My father he came to me,
and said,"Listen carefully,
to what I'm about to say
What I will say will fill you with bliss"
And then he told me this:
"When holidays come,
we like to celebrate
With candy and toys,
things that are a waste
So now I have come to you,
with something completely new,
something new to celebrate
The real celebration is here,
when all people begin to agree and cheer,
that even though the skin types differ,
we are all brothers and sisters
Black,White,Asian,and more,
if we could celebrate unity,
it would make everyone happy
This happiness last longer,
than candy and toys put together"
And smiling he said to me,
"Does this make sense to you?"
this something new to celebrate
- Title: Something New To Celebrate
- Artist: iYummyGum
- Description: This is a poem about something my Dad told me. I thought what he said was really cool and sincere,and it made a lot of sense to me,so I decided to make a poem about it.
- Date: 12/14/2008
- Tags: something celebrate
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Comments (4 Comments)
- Joann97 - 06/17/2009
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I thought it was good but it needed more emotion
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- candieluver - 03/21/2009
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omg! ugh... yawn thats way too long!
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- XxTheCrazyWafflexX - 02/08/2009
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i feel i heard siomething like that before biggrin
the way he put it made a hell of alot more sense then anyone else ever did lol
that's Awesome ^.^ - Report As Spam
- Julia Dream - 12/18/2008
- Some of the longer lines break rhythm, and you've got some punctuation/spacing issues (all punctuation is always followed by a space, or two spaces) and you stop rhyming in some lines, then pick up rhyming again, then stop again. Not all poems have to rhyme, but all poems should follow a steady pattern throughout the entire thing. 3/5
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