- As the minions watched carefully on the bag, it started to glow dark red lights. When they opened it, Jullia was turning in to a monster, she grew wings made of hangs big webbed hands, she had an saber-like teeth, body turn black, her face was gone putting in with a pale white face and hair started growing longer. She looked at the minions of Satan, and ripped em for shreds. A few day later after the minion kidnapped Jullia, the police found Jullia fainted. The police safely put Jullia back to her own home. Jullia remembered everything about what incident in the van, and thought it was for everyone's good and tried to kill herself by suicide. The next day, Chung visited Jullia's apartment and she tried to kill herself by hanging frm a rope. quickly Chung saved her, but it was too later.. Chung qucikly called 911 and requested an ambulance, but all that ends well. God made her kill herself so she'll never hurt anyone, but Satan was gonna kidnapped her himself, which he did at the hospital and revived Jullia, and made her join the dark side. Next is Heaven v Hell.
- by XxGods AssasinXx |
- Fiction
- | Submitted on 10/17/2008 |
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- Title: Death and Love pt 3
- Artist: XxGods AssasinXx
- Description: version of part 1 and part 2
- Date: 10/17/2008
- Tags: death love
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Comments (2 Comments)
- Eighth_Seal - 04/16/2009
- I like the sotryline too, but the story needs to be chronologically built. You could improvise so words like, "a few days later..." by using imagery or metaphors of the rocky hardships followed when Julia was taken. It brings readers in more.
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- Nepthys-Isis-Luna - 10/18/2008
- I like the story line but you need to arrange it a bit more chronalogicaly so it makes more sense. I got a little confused along the line and It would be great with more adjectives. Other than that its a good story.
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