• The scalding tears slid down my pale cheeks as I watched the white truck pull out of the driveway. I had known this day was coming for a long time now, I just never thought it would come this soon. Turning from the window, I saw Mother’s shaking form laying on the couch. Mother’s piercing cries echoed around the room, as she thrashed around. I could only stare at her, rooted to the ground. No matter how much I willed myself to move and hold her, I couldn’t. My feet were stuck to the plush carpet.
    Suddenly, I saw mother’s form rise from the couch and cross to the locked cabinet.
    “Mother!” I screamed realizing what she was going after. “No! Please don’t!” My body stiffened as the soft click of the lock opening sounded. It sounded as if it was right in my ear. “MOM!” The cabinet was opened and mother pulled out a charcoal gray object. “Please!”
    Mother smiled in my direction and I could tell her eyes were so full of hurt. “I’m sorry. With out him, I’m nothing. I can’t live without him. Forgive me. Please!”
    I closed my eyes and covered my ears. I didn’t want to hear the sound that was inevitable.
    After what seemed like a lifetime, I uncovered my ears. I could feel the warm crimson liquid that covered my body. It dripped off me from head to toe. Upon opening my eyes, I saw a river of blood coming from my mother whom I noticed was only a few feet from me as if she was trying to escape the shot and her own insanity. As if she was trying to ask me to reach out to her and pull her back to the real world. Her arm stretched out and her middle finger was an inch from the tip of my shoe.
    My senses flowing back to me, I grabbed the gun and threw it out of my own reach. I then knelt beside my mother and cradled her head in my arms. “I’m sorry I wasn’t strong enough to pull you back to light. I never blamed you for him leaving, It was all my fault if anything. I’m the reason he left, Mother. Not you.” I softly kissed her forehead and laid her back on the ground. “I’m the one who should seek forgiveness. Not you.”
    I lifted the bullet shell and placed it in my pocket. I then proceeded to ascend the stairs to take a shower, Knowing that the memories of this day would haunt me until the end of my days. Knowing that I was the one that made that devil man leave. Knowing that I was the one that pulled the trigger on my mother. Knowing that I shall wonder the earth until full of guilt and pain forever more.