I heard you the first time
My hands were shaking and I felt coldness even though it was a warm night. I knew that my secret was safe from veiw but every time I passed someone I stuffed my hands farther into my jacket. I saw the gas station and walked across the street towards it. I heard the ding of the automatic door telling the cashier someone was coming in. I walked up to the cashier trying to make my face look calm and carefree. I asked him for the keys to the bathroom but realized my mistake, I couldn’t show him my hands. But he would know I was hiding something if I didn’t take the keys. My thoughts raced through my head. One thought seemed to work. In a flash I located all the cameras. I followed their cords, the power source was in the far corner. I pulled out the gun and shot it. All the cameras were down. I turned and faced the man.
“I’m sorry…” I said. And then shot him in the head. I hated it but I had to. He couldn’t have seen my hands, not with the blood on them.
Again, a stupid mistake. Why couldn’t I think right when I needed to? Why couldn’t I just walk out of the store? But I couldn’t have, I don’t walk. I grabbed the keys and went into the bathroom. I went to the sink and washed my hands over and over trying to wash away… my act? But it couldn’t be that, even when you could no longer see the red, I kept washing. What was I trying to wash away, if not guilt? What was it? Fear? Couldn’t be, I didn’t get scared. But it had to be. I pulled my hands away. I had to do it, I had to. There was no other way. I tried to assure my self over and over that it wasn’t my fault that it was bound to happen. How did I get myself into this. Why can’t I walk away! Why? I hated myself for becoming who I am today. I turned away.
I heard the bell ring. I turned. A big hick walked into the door. He couldn’t see the dead cashier because of the counter.
“You the worker?” he asked in his country accent, his toothpick intelligently not moving while he talked.
“Yes,” I said.
“Good, you go give me the key to the bathroom,” he said, ordering me like a servant. Damn it, the blood would still be on the sink.
“It’s out of order,” I said.
“Then why you still holding the key?” I looked down at the key in my hand.
“I’m supposed to take this key with me when I leave, I have to take it to get a copy,” I said thinking on the spur of the moment. He gave me a grunt and jerked his head a little, keeping his eyes on me.
“Let’s say I don’t believe you, that you got something in the bathroom. What is it, a girl, pot?” he said. It struck me how low he though of me.
“Ya got me, it’s a girl,” I said, trying to not sound mocking.
“Ya can’t share?” he said. A feeling of disgust hit my stomach and I tried to hide it from my face..
“I only have her for a little more,” I said.
“Then what are you waiting for, let’s go get her,” he said pulling out his toothpick and trying to staighten out his hair.
“Alright, here’s the key I’ll be right there. You get her ready,” I said trying to sound convincing and as low as him. He smiled and winked. I let him go around the corner before I followed. I heard the door open.
“What the-“ I slammed the door closed and held it with my foot while I reached into my jacket to get my gun.
“What do you think ‘yer doing?” he shouted, “Geez’ is this blood in here? Who are you?” I didn’t answer, I loaded my gun and pointed it at the door.
“Didn’t catch that what did you say?” I asked, trying to locate where his voice was coming from behind the door.
“I said-“ I fired the gun where I heard his voice, instantly I heard the body drop.
“It’s alright, don’t finish. I heard you the first time.”
I heard the bell ring. Again? I put away the gun and walked around the corner ready to take charge. No one was there. Crap! They must of heard the gun, they might have seen me.
“Don’t worry , I just got here Jeremy,” I spun around at my name. Anger surged into my body.
“You look bad,” the man said cockily, “Like always.” He added with a smirk.
“What are you doing here?” I said.
“You didn’t think I wouldn’t find you. A top muderer like yourself doesn’t go unnoticed, especially not by me.”
“You made me what I am,” I snarled. “Why are you here, without your men?”
“I came to talk,” he said walking over pausing at the counter to look at the cashier, “What did he do, not give you the correct change?” Anger ran through me and I had to hold myself back from reaching for the gun and killing him, but I couldn’t I had to wait, wait to see what he wanted.
“I came to talk about your future, about what will happen to you if you keep this life up,” he said drumming his fingers gently on the counter.
“What do you care?” I asked, “You wanted me like this. You wanted me as your secret weapon. You asked me to kill people that I didn’t even know.”
“Oh so you knew cash boy over there. Well, that makes it SO much better. What would I care? You think I don’t care about you?” He said looking at me. I just glared at him. “Ah, fair enough, you’re right, mostly. But you would like to know wouldn’t you? Oh you’ll know,” he said almost too thoughtful and happily. All of a sudden I heard a noise and felt a bag shoved over my face. I struggled but all I got was a blow to my stomach. Then I felt a hard whack on my head and I fell unconscious.
“Don’t worry Jeremy, you’ll know...” the man said with a hard, sinister look on his face and a little chuckle escaped his mouth. He bent down and patted the handsome young face. “You’ll know.”
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