• Chapter 1: Ignorance
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    Forgive Me...

    Chapter One: Ignorance

    Written By: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: I DO NOT KNOW ARABIC! I only used a (very) crappy translator... Erm, I know very a little about Ancient Rome, but I know alot about ancient Egypt... And this is AU, so.. chaos is human like everyone else..

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    A silver-haired boy was standing in the middle of the coliseum; monsters of all sorts that were made of the modern table salt were everywhere. The Roman air was still cold and humid, as the whole city was gathered around to watch this lone boy take on the unstoppable gladiators.

    The mystery boy had mocha skin, almost to the degree where it seemed Egyptian. Despite his skin tone, his hair was as fair as ivory and his eyes were turquoise, while most Egyptians had dark eyes.

    "منحه حرية المروعه لهذه النفوس ملزمة لحم." the dark-skinned boy said as the Romans interpreted it as "Grant freedom to this soul trapped in flesh." Although, the real translation in Arabic was "Grant freedom to these horrid soul bound by flesh."

    A red-haired prince, Rubedo, watched the Egyptian, from his throne, made of a crimson stone that the Gnosis brought called Zohar, bright rubies adorning the dark chair. "Dammit! I wish I could do that! Dammit to hell!" he nearly screamed from the spectator's podium, pounding a fist against the armrest of his throne. His twin brother, Albedo, sat beside Rubedo in a diamond-studded, marble-white throne, watching the Egyptian boy fight off the evil in the stadium that was composed of mere sodium chloride. Nigredo was beside his brothers, in an onyx-studded, ebony throne.

    Unlike the twins, Nigredo had his mind on the death of their only sister, Citrine, and the absence of their father. Usually, Emperor Yuriev would love to see these things, but he had said he had important business to take care of. All of the Emperor's business associates were sitting in the seats of the stadium... Within Nigredo's view. Since Citrine and Nigredo's mother died, Dmitri had taken every interesting day off... and so far; this Egyptian had far surpassed any of the other gladiators who had come to fight those who had called themselves 'Gnosis'. The Gnosis had claimed that they, themselves, were the most superior gladiators on the face of Rome.



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    Rubedo sighed, watching the Egyptian closely. There was almost a dreamy look in his eyes as he observed the unknown boy's flawless grace with each stroke of his palm against the Gnosis gladiators... "I... want him." Rubedo said wishing the fight was over so he could take the boy to the palace to make him do unthinkable things to him. ..No, it was the other way, Rubedo wanted to make the boy want him as he had chills, just thinking about having him.

    "If you get him, can I torture him?" Albedo asked, some childish curiosity seeping into his voice.

    Rudedo shook his head. "No, he'll be mine. He will be my treasure." he replied to the younger twin, even if it was ten minutes, Rubedo was ten minutes older and always would be.

    "Treasure? What makes a slave your treasure?" Albedo asked, laughing.

    "He's... beautiful. It's all that counts.” he said, wishing the fight was over, so he could pay the trader for the boy.

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    Soon, the Egyptian was facing the last Gnosis. He quietly chanted his spell, knowing that it would work either way, so he brought his left hand into suspension in front of the Gnosis as it charged and began to ...dissipate into salt?

    The Romans and their servants began shouting their thanks to the boy from the stands. The boy rubbed the back of his neck and bowed, still in his default attire, an ivory loincloth... Which still brought out the skintone the boy had, among other things... Like sweat.

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    Rubedo rushed down to the Trader, the slave trader that is, and held a sack of raw jewels out to the man. "I want the boy.” he demanded, pointing to the Egyptian in the stadium.

    "Him? He doesn't speak Latin." the Trader said, eyeing the jewels.

    "I don't care. I want him. Albedo's paid you several times for the Kierchwassers..." he stated, taking some jewels back, "Why not discount this boy for the eldest son of the Emperor?"

    "Only if I can ahold of twenty of them."

    "Of... what?" Rubedo asked.

    "Twenty of your brother's precious Kierchwassers and I'll discount you."

    Was there no other way? Albedo had tortured and killed each one at every chance he got. It was like Rubedo's twin was becoming another person around those things. He could take a soldier's sword, cut a crevice in the woman's chest and push his palm through their open chests... pullling their hearts out to stop them. He'd then rape and further mutilate them.

    "They're... dead." Rubedo truthfully said. looking at the boy with unwanted lust in his blue eyes.

    "Then no discounts!" the man said, denying the sack of jewels.

    "Wait until my father hears about your obnoxious behavior!" Rubedo stated, "And I won't pay a gem for him if you wont discount me!"

    Dmitri Yuriev, the father of Rubedo, Albedo and Nigredo was a scary guy when something went wrong in Rome. He hardly listened to either Rubedo or Albedo, since they weren't considered sons to him after he was forced to re-marry to have his second wife have Citrine and Nigredo. Of course, Nigredo was almost always on the twin's side since they were brothers and Citrine had been murdered by a man named Jan Sauer. He was a very hard-to-catch criminal, but everyone in the palace knew him as the "Intentional Woman Beater". Jan was in hiding somewhere out of Rome, with the Mizrahi family's daughter, MOMO. Who knew what was going to happen to that little girl?

    The Trader fell silent. This boy was everything to the business... Even if he never spoke Latin. "I'll take him for ten gems!" he said as a final offer.

    No one knew his name, age or where he came from, aside from Egypt. He was extremely hard to talk to and the best of the trader's servants couldn't translate half of what he said. They almost always said he was talking in riddles.

    "Alright." Rubedo said, tossing the ten jewels at the Trader, taking the ivory-haired boy and began walking to the palace. "We're going home..." he softly said the boy. It was best to say something than nothing at all... Wise words from Juli Mizrahi, the counselor for Albedo.

    The ivory-haired boy nodded, looking at Rubedo. It was the first time he'd ever spoke Latin intentionally.

    "Yes... master." the boy coughed like he was extremely thirsty from the fight.

    Rubedo's eyes widened a bit. So... You do speak a little Latin. he thought, cooking up a little plan as he lead the servant to the palace.

    "We'll get you something to eat and drink. You're a walking skeleton!" Rubedo smiled, "In the meanwhile... I'd like to hear your pretty voice again."

    "Yes... master." he complied, doing as told.

    "Do you have a name?" the red-head asked, smiling at the other, who was walking beside him.

    "I'm sorry. I cannot permit you to hear my real name... Even if I am a servant." the silver-haired boy said, staring at the orange sand. I'm.. sure he's a nice person. Unlike that horrible trader. I hope Anubis sends him to Hell for his evil deeds.
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    Chapter 2: Changes--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Forgive Me...

    Chapter Two: Changes.

    Written By: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: Can you tell this is my first Xenosaga fanfic? Rubedo's such a pushover...

    If you haven't played the second Xenosaga or watched the FMVs, this is a spoiler chapter.

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    "Hmm... what can I call you then?" Rubedo said, remembering the little Arabic that he could mentally process at the moment. "Is there anything you want to tell me?"
    "In your language... your people can call me chaos." he said, glancing at the chariat that had arrived...taking a liking to staring the orange sand that he had walked on when he arrived in the city, during the night before last...

    "So, why were you with the Trader?" Rubedo asked, curious about the boy.

    "I'm the last of my clan. We were the only ones capable of fighting off Gnosis with pure ease. People called us mages for our power and often asked us to help those who were infected by Gnosis." chaos quietly said, yet, he was seething with his fists closed, knuckles white as pure snow.
    "But we couldn't help those infected with the Gnosis virus without killing them. So the Pharaoh ordered our clan to be killed. My mother survived long enough to send me here, to Rome. She died because she had lost so much blood. I hope Anubis is taking very good care of her soul." chaos continued, silver tears dripping onto the orange sand he loved so much at the moment.

    "Whaaat? This doesn't make sense!" Rubedo cried, crawling into the chariat. "The man I bought you from told me that you don't speak Latin."

    "I don't. When I do not want to." the Egyptian said, "I wish to preserve my memories of my homeland and use the spell that Master taught us to defeat Gnosis."

    "The Gnosis really like to get around, don't they?" he asked, telling the driver where the destination was as he glanced at chaos. Although he was gorgeously tanned to his eye's desire, the ribs that were poking out from the flesh were the only unattractive feature on the servant's body.

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    Albedo watched that filthy slave take off with his brother! Oooh, he was furious! He needed to kill something! ..Maybe Nigredo would suffice...
    "Albedo, we need to get you to Juli... She'll know what to do about your state of mind." Nigredo suggested.

    "That woman doesn't even know that MOMO is gone, how should I trust her?" Albedo asked, starting to walk to the palace, catching a few women off of the street while he did so. These dolls would make do for now, until he could kill that slave for taking his brother from him.

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    When the two had reached the palace, chaos was given a room, fed a decent meal, provided with a blue tunic with an orange belt, given a cold shower and then... The stars fell.
    It was a special time when night fell, to chaos. He would remember his mother's dying words, and how she told him how she would always love him.

    "Yeshua... Be a good boy, just like you always have... Find the one for you and live happily. I don't want my only son to suffer." his mother whispered as Yeshua, chaos, started to cry over his dying mother, "Please, Yeshua... I'll love you in my afterlife. Remember me for how I lived, not bitterness. There is far more in life than greif. My son, please go with them, they'll lead you in the right direction..."

    Yeshua nodded and ran his fingers through his mother's long hair. "I will mother. You need not worry about me in your afterlife. I am already a grown man." he replied to the pale Egyptian woman who was suffering from severe blood loss. He lightly held his mother's hand and continued to speak, "I will find that someone if it's the last thing I do."

    After Yeshua's final words, his mother's arm went limp. She was dead.

    "May Anubis rest your kind soul."

    "Mother... You're in safe hands now. Kind hands... Anubis' hands." he sighed, looking at the stars, running his fingers over the feather that she had around her neck that day... All of a sudden, chaos' back seized up, he couldn't move his arms... What...was happening to him? Before he knew it... chaos was out cold on the floor, blood dripping from his shoulderblades.

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    "chaos! chaos!" Rubedo called, entering the room of his servant to find bloody wings growing from his back. ((Erm... Pun not intended.))
    "chaos! What's happening to you?" he asked, scared to even touch the wings...and now...the other boy.

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    Chapter 3: Blood On My Hands--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Forgive Me...

    Chapter Three: Blood on My Hands

    Written By: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: Blah, blah... Xenosaga's not mine, we all know that. I'm sorry if this turns out bad! (Read A/N to find out why)

    This is before Medica was created! Heehee! And Rubedo's still got his growth defect!

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    Rubedo was starting to get worried about the servant, but simply stayed there, intruiged, eventually getting the courage to stroke the sleeping boy's silver hair, which was starting to get stained with droplets of blood. The left wing had pushed itself through chaos' back, staining the boy's hair even more, as the right began to slowly follow suit.
    Rubedo watched the tanned boy as he began to pale from the loss of blood. Rubedo lightly touched the boy's back the word "Rememdium", the Latin word for "Cure", escaping his throat. The fibres re-attached themselves more efficiently, the more Rubedo cast rememdium. All the crimson-haired boy could do was watch as the other's back began to tear up again, fresh blood covering the right wing that was still pushing itself out of his back.

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    What's happening to me?

    Why can't I feel?

    Am I awake? Or am I dead?

    My body's so numb... Maybe I'm like Mother afterall...

    chaos thought as he subconsciously stood in a pool of something that was too dark to be merely "darkness", he was in blackness. There was no light. He couldn't hear anything except his own silent screams, the screams that everyone should have heard... But his body had grown too weak. Although, he couldn't feel as much pain anymore. Who was it that was making sure that he wasn't internally crying, yelping from this agonizing pain?

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    "chaos!" Rubedo called, the prison of the room was small and wanted the prince to turn away to empty his stomach on the cold, baren floor, but he didn't. He kept casting rememdium, hoping chaos would wake up.

    His azure eyes were averted from the servant to the window, the Gnosis had... returned. Something was wrong with them... Why were they turning into these dark creatures..?

    Rubedo watched as they appeared through the wall... and the rest of chaos' wing was pushed through. The prince cast rememdium again, picked the servant up, and began to run. He needed to get the archers to start attacking and chaos to a medical ward. Rubedo's power was depleting and fast.

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    "Little master! What's wrong with him?" a blonde woman asked, another servant to Rubedo. Her hair was neatly braided and put in small bows... It was only recently that her name was revealed as Mary. Before, Mary was a mute. Even though she had a badly marred back from taking the three princes' misbehavior, she paid more attention to the two were covered in blood.
    "Shelly! You might want to see this!" Mary called, holding a hand over a scar as she yelled into another room.

    A woman with hair that had been dyed with violets, entered the room. A large yellow lily was matted into in her knotted hair. The first thing she saw was the blood, wanting to faint from hemophobia, but stayed strong for Rubedo. "Little Master... How did... this happen?" she asked, tightly holding her attire, until her knuckles camouflaged with the torn tunic.

    "I know, Mary... Shelly... you don't like blood and don't like treating people who are this badly injured just as much..." he gasped, exhausted from using most of his energy, converting it into magic.

    The sisters nodded, and began to take chaos, laying him on a wooden table.

    Rubedo drank some water that was in the basin, located by the wall. "Just cure him. He's going to be able to walk soon anyway..."

    "Little Master, how can you be so sure?" Mary asked, taking a moment to ask through the rigorous spellcasting.

    "He's mine. He'll come to realize that." he replied, "When he wakes, tell him he's grown wings."

    "Yes, Little Master." the girls replied.

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    As Rubedo left the room, Albedo slid in the emergency ward through a secret passage. "Hello ladies." he sadistically grinned.

    "Al-Albedo!" Shelly gasped.

    chaos' eyes opened, they were glassy, murky to a degree. He had been lost in that darkness for somewhile... But he felt no pain anymore...

    "Hello... Wretch." Albedo frowned, holding chao's chin, forcing the Egyptian to look at the prince.

    "...Master?" he murmered, his voice was near-gone from the muted screams.

    "Ahahaha! Such sweet words from someone who doesn't even belong to me! Oh, let me hear it again!" Albedo laughed, watching the sisters curl up in a corner.

    "...Master...Ru...be..do?"

    Albedo lost his patience when his twin brother's name was mentioned. "...I'll kill you... If you ever get close to my brother again!" he snapped, dropping his fingers so the boy would be forced to look back at the blood-stained floor. "Do you see the blood underneath you?!"

    chaos weakly murmered a 'yes'.

    "That is the blood of every Kierchwasser I've killed!" the man said, holding chaos' back down, causing the boy to hiss with pain... Such music to Albedo's ears! "Those women got what they deserved! 10, 40, 70! So many screaming women that were silenced! Those screams, they were all so beautiful too..." he excitely said, pressing his firm hand on chaos' tender back.

    "Pl-please... stop.." he huffed, not knowing how much more he could take before he passed out again.

    "Fine.. Have it your way. But don't go telling dear Rubedo about this... Or I'll be forced to kill you." the ivory-haired man told chaos as he gave the boy a Kiss of Death on the boy's bloody cheek, licking the blood away from the boy's face... Causing chaos to flinch.

    Albedo lifted his hand from chaos' back and entered the passage again.

    Mary and Shelly couldn't do anything about this, since they had already been given the Kiss not that long ago... When Albedo started to kill every servant he had.

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    "MEN! GET READY!" Rubedo commanded as he spoke to the archers, "Now, our targets are... those." he sighed, pointing to the transfomed Gnosis.
    The men nodded, pulling arrows out at the same time.

    "INTENDO! PRAEPARO! SUBOLES!" Rubedo demaned as the archers shot at the Gnosis.


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    Rubedos Benevolent Charm here:

    Kiss of Death - When the reciever is to die in the future, they are given a kiss. Most prefer on the cheek. A kiss on the lips signifies a certain death in a very short time.

    Intendo praeparo suboles - literally "Aim, ready, shoot!" But the dictionary I used didn't have 'fire' so I opted to 'shoot'.

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    Chapter 4: Seraph
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    Forgive Me...

    Chapter Four: Seraph

    Written By: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: Yeah.. yeah.. Can I just have my comments? All I really own is the 'fic...

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    chaos layed on the table, his silver tears mingling with the blood of so many women... "...Or did he simply pass false judgement on them?" he asked, coughing as the pressure on his tender back was starting to be relieved. The tanned angel took in a few shaky breaths as he attempted to sit up on his own, resulting in his falling over and the two sisters catching him.
    "..I'm sorry." he said, taking Shelly's hand and started to walk into a corridor, his legs collapsing on him almost immediately. The boy noticed the blood around him, and began to wonder what had happened.

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    "Alright! We did it!" Rubedo cried in joy, raising his bow in the air. "Your great feat today deserves a meal of fine wine and Roman dining!"
    As the soldiers marched to the Dining Hall to eat and drink, they all sang something similar to 99 bottles of wine on the wall. The drunken fools had the princes, Rubedo and Nigredo to join in after a bit of drinking. After a while, everyone was on different numbers and Rubedo had enough. He wanted to see his tan-skinned angel.

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    chaos sighed, letting the warm stream of water wash his cares, fears and blood away. "I wonder... when the last time I had a warm shower...?" he mused, tilting his head back to allow the water access to his cheek, where Albedo had licked some blood away.
    Shelly and Mary had to help chaos strip from his tunic before going into the bathing room. But the angel was far too weak to do anything but sit under the stream of water, or else he'd have drowned in the pool of water.

    Footsteps echoed in chaos' ears... it was a lone person, so whoever it was couldn't be a threat.

    He was very, very wrong.

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    "chaos..." a voice whispered, "chaaoosss..."
    The angel remained silent. Why was this person calling him like this?

    Albedo stepped from behind the wall. "I've got you now, chaos." he said, smirking.

    chaos' eyes widened in fear as his eyes began to water. A lone silver tear escaped his left eye, not wanting to experience that excruciating pain again.

    White wings cascaded down to chaos' mid-back. Even though they weren't fully grown, they were protrusions compared to any other ordinary human. Too small to allow him to fly, too light, yet, painful to allow him to move on his own.

    The silver-haired prince walked towards the angel, stroking the wings, hearing beautiful hisses from the discomfort of the newly grown wings. Albedo loved hearing about the boy's wordless agony. It was his pleasure, joy and soon, he'd make the angel pay for taking his brother away from him... paying with his life...

    How... could Albedo like this? chaos thought, hearing his own yelp as the prince tore a feather out from his delicate back. His back was in pain enough without someone pulling, stroking and tearing at his wings.

    Soon, there was more blood. His own blood. chaos didn't like it, he didn't even like it when he saw the countless Kierchwasser's blood in the emergency ward...

    "Albedo... Why?" chaos asked, glancing at the other's amethyst eyes with his turquiose ones.

    Albedo grinned, being his sadistic self. "Because... You need to pay for taking Rubedo from me..." he replied, his voice as evil as his smile.

    "But I didn't... do anything..." he pleaded, tears starting to fall from his eyes. No clear, ordinary tears fell from chaos' eyes. These tears were as crimson as the blood dripping from his back. As his wings throbbed he belived Albedo was pulling at them while he was actually watching the angel. "Please... I'll do anything."

    Albedo knelt down to the angel kissing him. "Then when dear Rubedo has no need for you, be my little slave. I will spare your life that way." he whispered in the boy's ear.

    chaos continued to cry, his throat froze as well as his lungs. chaos simply sobbed, letting the tears fall on his bare legs.

    The tears caught Albedo's eye, since they were different. "I see why he left me... You're crying blood..." he stated, his shocked voice betraying his sadistic mask.

    Even though he was an angel, chaos was a slave... He was no important seraph... 'chaos' was nobody, while Yeshua was someone with great Egyptian pride.

    Albedo raised a fist to the angel, holding chaos by the back of his hair. "You'll pay!" he screamed, "You took Rubedo away from me! My brother was everything I had!"
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    Chapter 5: Broken Wings--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

    Forgive Me...

    Chapter Five: Broken Wings

    Written By: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: I am scared of my own writing as Albedo... Anyways... Leave a comment (please and thank you) and I'll be happy to continue this thing.

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    Albedo raised a fist to the angel, holding chaos by the back of his hair. "You'll pay!" he screamed, "You took Rubedo away from me! My brother was everything I had!"
    The silver-haired prince raised the servant higher in air. "chaos, chaos, on the wall... Cry those tears 'till you fall!" he cackled, watching him expecting the blood to fall down his face.

    chaos whimpered as Albedo held him against the wall by his ivory hair. "Albedo.. please.." he choked through sobs, "I.. never.."

    "You're nothing but a worthless slave. To be used, and passed around." Albedo harshly said, taking his free arm to impact chaos' cheek.

    It was the moment that chaos felt the closed fist against his face, he broke down. Crimson tears as fair as the blood in the walls and floor dripped faster from his eyes, simeltaneous stained waterfalls ran down the angel's face.

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    Rubedo drunkenly held a bottle of wine between his lithe fingers, walking towards the bathing room.
    As he reached the room that was echoing with dying screams, he watched the scene unfold before him. Albedo was ruthlessly beating chaos against the marble, causing the angel to cry out every once and a while. The 'magic trick' of chaos sobbing crimson tears amazed him.

    In a drunken stupor, Rubedo began to clap, spilling some fine Greek wine on the floor. "Albedo, this show is wonderful..." he said, not realizing he wasn't himself. He had also stupidly let his little brother know he was there.

    "Ah... Rubedo... Rubedo... Rubedo... How nice of you to come witness your precious chaos' demise." Albedo laughed, holding chaos higher in the air. "As we speak, I'm getting my spoil... The loss of his life."

    Rubedo sobered up at the words of his mentally unstable brother. "Why does he have to die? Can't you just tell me what you're so angry about?!" the older twin cried, silver tears streaming down his face.

    Albedo threw chaos against the wall and let go of his brother's servant. "That wretch managed to take you away from me! I missed having my brother beside me at night..." the younger twin protested, digging his nails into his palm. "We're still close aren't we?"

    "Albedo... I understand. But we're twenty-seven. We've been grown men for some time now." Rubedo explained, "Are you really going to kill him because I need to move on?"

    "Why are you protecting him?"

    "Albedo, I'm protecting him for the same reason you want to kill him. You're trying to become stronger, but I can't let you." Rubedo sighed, walking to the near-dead angel, "...Maybe... I'm trying to say that you just can't kill him because he's taken my time away from seeing you... or maybe... because he's a divine creature, shackled to this realm against his will. Either way, I'll protect him him until my final breath."

    "If I can't have you, no one can." the younger twin hissed, walking out from the bathing room. He was well aware that he and Rubedo were declared men eleven years ago, but he loved his brother more than anyone could begin to understand.

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    chaos stood in that pool of blackness again, he was waist-high this time in the cold water. he glanced at his hands, which seemed to glow a bit... No, as he looked at his body, it was all glowing. He reached out, but seemed to fall... Down and down... It never ended... Was he his losing grip...on his life?
    As chaos fell, he began to think Albedo's hidden ambition. To become stronger.

    What is strength? A comparison to others? No. It's something that lies deeply within your heart... Engraved. True strength holds not power, but kindness. Albedo has to learn this.. before it's too late.

    chaos' soul tried it's hardest to bind itself to his body...

    ...When he thought he was dead, chaos woke up in the Emergency Ward again... Rubedo was asleep in a corner, Mary and Shelly were still using their magic to close his wounds.

    The angel slept from exhaustion, due to his near-death experience.

    It was only a short time after chaos fell asleep that Rubedo awoke. He stretched out and began to softly stroke chaos' back, avoiding anywhere with feathers. It was clear before when he heard screams from touching the wings. All he could do was take a washing rag and wipe the blood from chaos' body, being as extremely gentle as he could.

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    The next morning, chaos awoke to find bandages on his wings. Mary was the first person chaos spoke to.
    "They're broken.. It's hard to say when none of us have wings." she quieitly yawned, rolling over on the little cot.

    "I see..." he sighed, At least let me fly with my broken wings... Oceans away from Albedo.

    "I'm sorry I couldn't do anything.. Albedo did a real number on them." Shelly explained, yawning from the two day long all-nighter.

    A red-headed child, no, Rubedo was a man with a growth defect... "chaos... You're awake!" he exclaimed, running towards the angel and giving him a tight hug. "You had me worried... that he killed you."

    "Master, I do not die that easily." chaos smiled, "Are you hungry? Do you have a fever?"

    Rubedo glanced at his servant, simply embracing him again before he could speak. "I'm just happy you're alright. Let's get you fed, you must be famished." Rubedo weakly chuckled. Because, most men wouldn't worry about disposable slaves. But chaos... was someone he'd keep until he had to die.

    ...There was an everlasting lust running through Rubedo, but why couldn't he just use chaos as he see fit? ...He couldn't be...in love...

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    Chapter 6: Dead Or Alive
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    Forgive Me

    Chapter Six: Dead or Alive

    Written by: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: I think the plot is jumpy, it's too spaced out for time, and I hate Bon Jovi today.

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    chaos held his breath, feeling a cloth run over the delicate wings. It was for the best anyways, since he had forgotten to clean the blood off of them.

    "chaos. You're shaking." Rubedo sadly said, unraveling more of the bandages. The feathers were crimpled out of their straight position. The angel looked like a bloody fugitive... only with wings and that gorgeous skin... "Listen... we're going to move you. You're sleeping in the same quarters as myself. I don't want him to go through with your death."

    chaos' eyes held no expression except pain as he felt the cloth scrub the blood from the smooth feathers. The silver-haired Egyptian let a short scream as Rubedo tugged on a bit of matted blood and feathers.

    This was extremely new to him, for he'd only grown wings a mere week ago. Now, they were broken and had his blood matted into them. When he'd first obtained them, Mary and Shelly cleaned his wings carefully. Albedo caused him to cry angel's tears and break something that had been there for only two days.

    "chaos? Are you going to be alright?" the red-headed prince asked, looking at a single crimson tear that was starting to fall.

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    MOMO awoke, holding a small bear that her mother had sewn for her. She knew the sketches from around the plaza, of the wanted criminal, Jan Saur. Who had kidnapped Princess Citrine. …Yet, her surroundings were far from anything in the rich, Roman city.

    “Mr. Saur, where are we?” MOMO asked, due the fact that she was to never leave Rome.

    “It’s a battleground.” Jan replied, kneeling by some wildflowers, “Erich and my comrades were shot down here by Citrine.”

    The man carefully placed a flower on every hand-dug grave, giving a small prayer.

    MOMO bit her lip at the story, as to prevent crying. “I see…” she sniffled, sitting up with the brown bear. For some odd reason, this man made MOMO feel more at home than the man she was to married to ever could. He did wear silver around his arms and legs, although it was the sign of rebellion and a warrior. Yet, MOMO liked this Jan Saur than what she’d heard about Albedo Pisora, the man she was to marry.

    “Are you alright? Would you like some water?” Jan asked, glancing down at the rose-haired girl…noticing that she looked a bit sad and lonely.

    “Nothing…is…wrong…” MOMO replied to the man who’d kidnapped her, pulling the toy bear closer to her 14-year-old chest.

    It was so…strange. MOMO felt like she could run away and have no regrets with this man.

    Jan further studied her facial features and expression. “Then tell me why you look so lost.” he stated, causing MOMO to jump.

    “Mommy and Daddy told me to never, ever leave Rome. They said my engagement to Albedo Pisora… would be broken if I left…” MOMO explained, sniffling as she tugged on one of the pink ponytails that rested atop her head.

    Jan could very easily tell that MOMO was weak and nervous…unable to fight for herself… The Mizrahi girl was far too different from Citrine, who managed to kill Jan’s comrades with ease. The payback she got was her death.

    MOMO was scared of him. Scared of possibly losing the engagement.

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    Author’s note:

    I had to include MOMO here and let people know she was alive if the question “Is MOMO alive or not?” killing you inside-out.

    No much has changed since chaos broke his wings, but don’t get excited and expect something amazing from me ever two weeks like before. I actually need to be in school to do this stuff… I actually, just remembered I wrote Chapter Six in Math in the middle of Semester Two.

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    Chapter Seven: Reminisce
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    Forgive Me

    Chapter Six: Reminisce

    Written By: Rubedos Benevolent Charm

    Disclaimer: I don't own the game. Xenosaga is GODLY compared to my work.

    BTW, I'm my own editor, so I make mistakes...


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    The night fell, the same shimmering gold moon glistened down, blessing Rubedo's bedroom with dim light. chaos had another painful night, as sweat, tears and blood were reflecting the light. Matted white and red wings slightly glowed against the sky.

    In the past month, chaos' wings had grown about a foot, and if he really tried, he could barely get off of the ground. Though, tonight was the most painful of them all. Since, last month, he had grown his miraculous wings. They twitched and shuddered as he tried to get up off of the cot.

    His tunic was off, exposing his back and the rest of his body, to the hot summer nights. And even if he had the mindset, he didn't have the willpower to share the same bed as Rubedo. The man had implied that they would be sleeping together, and never losing the other's sight.

    Though chaos felt horrible when Albedo kidnapped him and used him as a torture toy. A few weeks back, Rubedo woke up to a badly beaten chaos. He had broken six ribs, one arm, and a foot. Seven fingers, a cheekbone and a leg were cracked up like he was only a broken doll... Waiting to be broken again. The angel was told to lie about everything. Even how Albedo almost tore his wings off. The angel only replied with "I'm sorry" and "I wanted them gone. I wanted myself gone."


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    Albedo knew he was furious at chaos for looking at his brother and stealing the looks that should have been for him, away. He had to fix things. He knew chaos was going to obey one way or another. He just prefered... the more violent method.

    The silver-haired prince had blinded chaos temporarily when he snapped the boy's fingers back, one by one. Three didn't break however... But it would be useful to him either way.

    As soon as chaos was blind, Albedo threw the boy to the floor, stepping on his oh-so precious back. He heard snapping and sobbing. It was what he loved to hear.

    But after a minute or so of sobbing, he stomped on chaos' arm, nearly breaking the bones in half, but it was good enough. The wailing was better. He was begging for Rubedo to help him.

    Albedo hoisted chaos up against the wall, forcing his toes to bend to his heel, snapping the bones, producing more crying. But, Albedo wasn't done there... He personally delivered a strong punch to chaos' face, breaking a jaw and cracking a cheekbone. Oh, he was enjoying this...

    He violently threw a block of marble at the servant's leg, and he was done. He had created the most broken creature on the planet. It feared him, it obeyed him, it lived for him.

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    Though, even if it was a short-lived time, Rubedo could see the signs of when chaos was lying.

    His lips were tightly pressed into a forced smile, and he held his hands together, like he were silently praying to God. Often times, the angel would crack his knuckles or leave stressed, hollow gaps in his neck when he was forcing himself to smile. Any idiot could tell that apart from the truth. And even if Rubedo didn't buy it, he kept it a secret from the angel, and treated him immediately.

    chaos got to his feet, walking toward his sleeping master. He knew he should express his feelings, yet time was not infinite for the man. For angels were to live forever, unharmed by the plight of man. Yet... chaos felt hollow inside. His body wanting to die, but his commonsense knew he should live... even if it were for the man.

    Men lived their designated lifespans given so they could die, rot, and be forgotten.

    Though, the angel had gotten used to this pain. His mother was the only family he had left, and she had died not more than a month ago. His back was the only pain he wasn't used to. It was tearing him apart to have to go through the same thing more than four times a month. But, his wings were somehow, always getting stronger...

    He stepped close to Rubedo, being careful of how he walked, for he didn't want to wake him.

    That delicate face was worth everything though... The prince looked ever so breakable in his slumber, the pale face that looked, so human, yet, so much like a real angel's... Dark eyes were the result of staying up late waiting for chaos to snap out his pain.. But, they were mostly from waiting for his brother to return chaos back to him. A sullen face and overly-skinny body was from worry, stress and trying to keep his eyes on chaos, not his meals.

    chaos did what he thought would push Rubedo away. Carefully, he moved in, closely watching how he was angled, and placed a kiss on the man's lips. The Egyptian tried to move back, but the felt an arm snaking it way up, wrapping it way up and pulling chaos into the kiss... Pulling chaos closer, and making him feel awkward.

    The angel carefully pried the arm from behind his neck and placed it back under the blanket and pulled his lips away from the prince's soft ones. chaos knew he would regret this, but as long as the other wanted him in a sleeping drunken stupor... He had to do this, he had to taint his own soul to purify the man's... The man who truly owned him.

    chaos got up, starting to walk back to his cot, looking over his shoulder to take in the face that saw something no one else did. "Forgive me..." he sighed, crimson tears streaming down his face, "Forgive me Master Rubedo. For you have a limited time here on this realm, where I do not. ...Please, forgive me."

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    chaos managed to lay back on his cot, falling asleep... Never once noticing that Rubedo's eyes flickered open once the forced embrace was broken...

    Rubedo sat up, running his fingers through his crimson red hair. "You're not a mistake... I forgive you with ever fiber of my being... I just want to... love you as long as can." he whispered in the darkness, looking at the full moon, that was temporarily hidden by the clouds, lit the room dimly again and went back to sleep, pressing a finger to his lips, trying to remember hiw chaos felt..

    Probably alone... and cold... his thoughts told him, but the course, chapped lips, that belonged to chaos, had no time to feel alone. He most likely felt physical pain his entire stay at the palace.

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    Chapter 8: Reincarnation
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    Forgive Me

    Chapter Seven: Reincarnation

    Written By: Sora

    Disclaimer: I only own the fanfic. I borrowed ideas, but I changed them so no one would notice.


    Too bad they fired the original designers... Xenosaga IV would have been amazing!

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    chaos snapped the book shut. "Jr, I think this is enough." he said, smiling. He'd been reading from his journal from that time, and that place. The silver-haired boy looked up and gave a smile to the splitting image of Master Rubedo.

    "chaos! That is isn't fair!" the man impatiently whined, sitting up in the bed. "I mean, what happened to him? I mean he was your ancestor! There has to be more!"

    chaos, who had gotten up, turned around and smiled. "It would be disrespectful of you to go through my things. I would be much happier if you didn't bring it up again." chaos said, not being able to resist the pain that his past brought back.

    Jr had found his master's journal, and just when.... chaos thought he was over his master, the memories were too strong. It had killed him to have to read the memories his master left him through his will, and no knife or bullet could pierce deep enough to reach his pain.

    Not only that, but those journals tied him to his past, to remember those simple times... when his master was just.. so full of that force to protect him. Master Rubedo was so different from Jr that it hurt him.. But Jr was so much like Master Rubedo in so many ways... It was so incredibly strange... This didn't make sense, but somehow it did. It was like his master came back for him.

    Jr leaned on the bed, trying to see chaos' face. "...chaos..?" he asked, causing chaos to snap his head up.

    ...Master... he thought, as he watched the worry on Jr's face, and carefully looked at the other's eyes. The very same. He was the very same...as before. chaos was forgetting that time. "Excuse me... I need to take a painkiller... My head's throbbing." he said, walking away.

    "..chaos." Jr murmured, laying down again, his thoughts running like a bullet train. "...Why.. is he acting like this lately?" he asked himself, turning onto his side, falling asleep as he was getting sleepy with all those stories.

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    The silver-haired boy slumped against his bed once he got there. He pulled a red leather journal from under the bed. chaos hugged the book gently. "Master... What am I going to do..? He's trying to get you... It's strange... He's so much like you..." he said to himself, knowing 29 years ago he would see the soul of his beloved master. The only logical reason was to be going senile now.

    The spirit was never there anymore, and worst of all, Rubedo was probably hating him. In the last couple thousand years, chaos had said some snarky things.. But not something that would make his Master's spirit go away for this long.

    A knock on the door make chaos look up from his task.

    "Open up, Yeshua. We need to talk." a familiar voice said, as the angel's eyes lit up.

    "Coming!" he said, pressing the switch to his door, unlocking it. Jr was standing there.. But it wasn't his voice...

    Jr walked into the room, sitting on the bed. "Don't you recognize your own master, Yeshua?" he asked, arms crossed and face slightly disappointed.

    chaos shut the door again, engaging the locks. "What are you doing there, Master Rubedo?" he asked, setting the book on a table. What was Master Rubedo doing here? So many questions...

    "As you can see, I've chosen this body as my host... I'll probably die in this one too.. But why did you call me?" he asked, twisting a leg up to rest his cheek in his palm. "Have you forgotten what I was in that time?"

    chaos bowed his head. "I sadly, have..." the servant replied, bowing his head. Memories of thousands of beating rushed to his head.

    "I was a monster. Just as I am in this body. Although, when you brought my soul to the lab, I was shocked to find Albedo as well as Nigredo... and Dad... So many people... from our past. Do you remember MOMO? Jan Sauer? Nigredo? Albedo?"

    "How could I not remember Albedo...?" chaos huffed.

    "Even Mary and Shelly are back. They all look different, as I do. But they are your friends from the past." Rubedo said, calmly leaning back on the bed. "Remember those days clearly, as you are going to have to repeat history."

    chaos shook his head. "No. I just... cant." he said, walking towards his master.

    "Yeshua, it's not a choice. History will repeat itself without warning." Rubedo said, "Now, do as told... And make sure you kill me when the time comes."

    The servant shook his head, "No.. I can't lose you again!" reason in his pleading.

    "If that time doesn't come, you don't have to." Rubedo sighed, as he knew the pain the servant felt. Losing a loved one was always painful. "Yeshua, please carry me back to that room. My host is waking up."

    chaos chuckled. "I can tell him he was sleep-walking again." he smiled. At least I know why you're so precious to me, Jr.

    Jr woke up, glancing around. "Where am I?" he asked, yawning.