Well, as they say; curiosity killed the cat.

    I silenced myself as soon as the disasterous question flew past my lips. I continued to lie on my back and keep a firm grip on Kai's shirt as he stared at me in a daze...an angry daze. His eyes delved into a deeper crimson and he locked his jaw. How could I be so stupid as to ask him about changing me into a Vampire...again?? I asked him before and he had gotten upset over it, but here he is, thirsty and he had just gotten me back.

    "Are you trying to send yourself back to the orphanage?" he halfway threatened between his teeth.

    I flinched as soon as he said "orphanage" and shook my head, "No! I-I was just curious!" I was fearing him once more.

    "About what?" he hissed and glared at me.

    I gulped loudly and my hands were trembling, despite my grip on his shirt, "It-it's too selfish. Don't bother."

    Kai looked away and a small growl slipped through his teeth again, "I don't care how long it takes, but if you're asking me to infect you, I want to know exactly why,"

    "It's kind of a test...A test to see how much you still love me," I was shrouded in regret. "I was just wondering if you loved me enough to change me."

    "I won't ever," he hissed again, "do that to you."

    "No, you're misunderstanding," I stopped him. "What I mean is, if the time ever came where you literally had no choice but to turn me into a Vampire or die, would you change me?"

    To my surprise, Kai smirked and released a dark chuckle, "You're seriously thinking to that extent?" he seemed amused now. "Do you want to be a Vampire?"

    I pondered for a moment and thought back to the few things Kai told me about the transition from human to Vampire. I shuddered and shook my head lightly, "No,"

    Kai's face turned serious once more, "Good," he set it straight. "Because it would be worse for you than death itself."

    I heard and felt my heart rip in half, "So you'd rather me die," I didn't even bother to phrase it into a question.

    "No, never," Kai kissed my forehead. "You're not going to die."

    "You're not making any sense!" I blustered at him. "If I'm human, then I will die! I'd die in another seventy years if I were an average human!" I was fuming. "How is it that I won't die soon if I'm not a Vampire?"

    It kept sounding like I wanted to become a Vampire so badly, but I was pretty neutral about it. I didn't want to go through the pain, but I knew I would eventually get over it although it would take years and years.But I'd gladly do it if it meant several hundred more years with Kai. The pain would be completely worth it.

    "Just trust me on this," Kai whispered. "It's better for you to stay human."

    "I'm not like Ayame," I jumped to conclusions. "Is it something else? There must be something holding you back if you'd rather me die than become a Vampire on my deathbed."

    "I just--" he sighed and avoided eye contact and unconsciously rubbed my back with the hand that was still in my camisole. "I don't want you to be a killer like I am."

    I couldn't exactly think of anything else to say to him; I didn't exactly want to become a Vampire--or at least it wasn't my first priority--and have to suffer through the thought of killing people, "Then...can you tell me more?"

    Kai eyed me curiously with a hint of angst in his eye from his past, "More what?"

    "Tell me more about your past," I demanded. "About your first years as a Vampire. When you were human."

    "You don't want to know what it was like the first few years as a Vampire,"

    I paused and sighed and stared at him sentimentally, "Who was your first victim?" and as soon as I asked that, his face fell.

    Kai unhanded me and climbed off of the bed. I sat up and watched him as he silently and gracefully made his way to the dresser. He reached for and searched through the bottom dresser until he pulled out a white t-shirt of his. He folded it neatly and headed back in my direction. He climbed onto the bed next to me and pressed the folded t-shirt against the wound on my neck. I held my breath at the sting that followed. I held the shirt where it was as Kai swept away some of my bangs. He gently pushed me down so I was lying on my side and he placed himself on his side in front of me.

    "What I tell you might alter your opinion on me," he whispered.

    I shook my head, "No it won't," I told him. Remembering back to when he first attacked me, my opinion and thoughts didn't change dramatically. I was sure this wouldn't be much different.

    Kai sighed and took a deep, concentrated breath, "You are already knowledgeable about the drastic change that happened to Kira and I in eighteen-fifty, right?" he asked and I nodded. "After that happened, I spent days wondering what was wrong with me. There was a henious burning in my throat and I felt combustible from all of the pain.

    "I was in a secluded part of Hokkaido so there were not so many people around. In fact, I hadn't seen anybody for days after I became a Vampire, so I hadn't had any blood."

    Kai's face ultimately fell again, "She was about eight years old," he whispered. "My first victim. Her and her six-year-old little brother were walking home from school. The didn't even need to produce a cut on themselves for me to pick up the incense of their blood. I attacked without a second thought, completely devoured by the monster I became.

    "I attacked the girl first, sucking her dry within two solid minutes. Her brother was too petrified to run away, so I attacked him. He was fortunate enough to have managed to get out alive. It was after I left them that I realized what I was. I had never been knowledgeable about Vampires before and the next thing I knew, I became one.

    "My first taste of human blood sent me on an uncontrollable rampage. I ended up killing over ten humans within two days. The craving wouldn't stop; the burning wouldn't cease. It took me another several days for the burn to calm down, but the craving was still henious. You remember after I attacked you the first time and I had told you I've killed around fifty-seven people?"

    I nodded, remembering clearly. The fear, the sorrow, the curiosity and the confusion behind it all. I knew he had killed people, but that was a lot...at least to me that was a lot.

    "Fifty-seven was just about how many people I ended up killing in my first month," his face hardened and I held my breath. "I've probably killed hundreds, considering how long I've been around. A few weeks ago, there was a human girl who was engaged...who was found dead by her car. Did you hear about that?"

    I nodded again, a lump forming in my throat, "Yeah,"

    "I was the one that killed her," he whispered and avoided eye contact again. "She was my first human victim since I met you and she ended up dying of blood loss. And she was engaged, no less. It was when I noted her engagement band that I set off on my rampage, because my betrayal to you was the first thing that came to mind."

    "Kai--" I couldn't finish what I was going to say before the lump in my throat increased in size.

    "I'm sorry you had to know that," he whispered, cupping my cheek with his hand and tracing over my right eyebrow with his thumb. "But it's what happened. I'm incapable of retaining my sanity without you." he sighed. "That's one reason why I brought you back."

    "Kai..." I whispered before I grasped his face with both of my hands and pressed my forehead against his. I closed my eyes and sighed, my breathing uneven. "Kai, I'm so sorry."

    "I shouldn't have said anything else," he said to himself, although I could hear it clearly.

    "No," I protested right away. I gazed into his gunmetal eyes and sighed, "Tell me more about your past. Tell me about when you were human."

    Slight surprise danced across Kai's complexion for a short moment. He burrowed his eyebrows together and looked as though he were in deep thought. Could he remember much about his human life? Were most of his memories of his former life erased when he became a Vampire?

    "My memories are faint, but I still remember enough," he smiled at me halfheartedly.

    "Tell me," I whispered. "Please."

    He sighed and cupped my cheek again, "You already know about my birth...November twenty-third, eighteen thirty-two." he thought for another moment. "Kira and I were born into severe poverty. We had no home, we had no money. Our mother...she died when I was...I think I was four. She died of some cancer...I can't recall.

    "Kira and I were left in our father's care. He was pretty much a combination of me and Kira. Anyways, we were told to live with him. After my mother died, my father developed this severe drinking addiction. He never became abusive, but he always put his life on the line most nights. He even tried to kill himself at the death of my mother.

    "Kira and I went to school, but we could barely afford it. We had to pay for school ourselves after we got jobs and our father would pay for our daily needs. We were lucky enough to make it through high school...well...most of high school." his face showed no expression.

    "You two were infected before you graduated," it was obvious by the way Kai ended his statement.

    "Just a couple of weeks before graduation," he smiled halfheartedly.

    I didn't seem too concerned about the fact that Kai didn't graduate before he became a Vampire. I'm pretty sure that he graduated high school many times after he learned to control his craving a little better.

    "I don't think I told you, but I became a Vampire faster than Kira because I was a hemophiliac," he sighed.

    I burrowed my eyebrows together in confusion, "You were?"

    He nodded, "I was hospitalized a lot when I was human; that's why we went into deeper poverty. And I was restrained to doing most things a human could, as you can probably imagine."

    I nodded to show him I understood, "But how did that make you become a Vampire faster than Kira?"

    "The more you bleed, the faster you become a Vampire. The Vampire venom becomes your new blood source so it replaces your blood quicker if you bleed more."

    I shivered at the thought; the thought of seeing Kai lying on the ground, bleeding to death, the venom sucking out his life. I looked down and tried erasing the image from my head, but was incapable. Kai rubbed my arm and sighed.

    He paused for a moment, "Kira and I had a little sister...did we tell you that?"

    My eyes widened and I shook my head in disbelief, "You did??"

    He nodded, "Yes. But she died shortly after my mother did from a machinery accident at my father's old job. She was about three years old. Her name was Kimi."

    "Kai," I shook my head. "Kai, I'm so sorry."

    He shrugged, "I've been through worse,"

    "How were you back then? As a teenager? Was your personality the same as it is now?" I was becoming more curious. I was almost glad that I asked Kai about turning me into a Vampire because now I'm learning about his past.

    He chuckled and sighed, "Kira was basically the same, but without the periodical withdraws from society. And me..." he thought for a moment and chuckled again. "I was pretty much like Takeuchi, but not quite that exuberant."

    I giggled, "You can't be serious. You?"

    Kai shrugged, "It is what it is,"

    I giggled again, "Of all people, you're the one I would least expect to have been like Takeuchi,"

    He smiled at me and brushed my hair aside. His smile dissipated and he gazed at me, "Let me ask you a question now,"

    Him ask me a question? Didn't he already know enough about my past? Kai wrapped one arm around my waist and pulled me a little closer to him, but we weren't holding each other. I clutched the shirt resting on my neck wound and waited for Kai to sort through his questions. He was breathing steadily, but it almost looked too concentrated...as if he were trying to calm himself.

    "How much have you thought about becoming a Vampire?" he whispered after pressing his lips against the crown of my head.

    My heart jumped once more, "Um, not much. Basically I thought of it the times I had asked you about if you would change me. I don't want to at the moment, though."

    "Good," Kai sighed. "But I wish there was a way I could revert back to human. I would wish for nothing more."

    "Why?" I looked up at him with curious eyes.

    "Because it's how it's supposed to be. I'm supposed to grow old and die and rot in the ground just as any other mortal is doomed to do. That's how I would prefer to live."

    I frowned at him, "But why? Why would you want to blend in with society by becoming ugly and pathetic like we are? You're amazing the way you are; your abilities, your knowledge, your six hundred to eight hundred-year life span, your beauty." I blushed at the "beauty" part.

    He chuckled darkly and brushed my hair aside some more, "It's all a part of a curse,"

    I cupped my hand over his and closed my eyes and smiled lightly, "Well, I'm loving the curse right now,"

    "Just please," he traced over my eyebrow with his thumb again, "don't feel the need to go through what I did. That's the last thing--next to you dying--that I want happening to you. I don't want you going through the pain of the transformation and then the pain of killing so many people.

    I nodded in confirmation and I soon fell into confusion; every few seconds, I would feel the powerful urge to want to be a Vampire. But soon after that, I would want to stay human and vice versa. I wanted to be with him for hundreds of years to come and becoming a Vampire was basically the only way. I couldn't help but feel doubts about Kai's love for me now. Maybe he wants me to stay human so that he could eventually move on when I die? I'm pretty sure he'll dump me once I'm nineteen, a year older than he truly is. I shook my head and looked away from Kai; how could I think such things? If he felt that way, he probably wouldn't have allowed me back here.

    Kai grasped my face with both of his large hands on either side of my cheeks and stared at me with pleading and sorrowful eyes, "Arisa...,"

    "I'm sorry," I sighed. "My mind can go to the extremes sometimes. It's nothing, really." I smiled at him halfheartedly to show I was okay.

    Kai locked his jaw and at that, he rolled over me, still holding onto my face delicately, and planted a sweet and cool kiss against my lips once again. My breath was taken and I was finally able to relax, just until I started kissing him harder. He seemed to be struggling; it felt as though he were restraining himself from pulling back. The moment finally came where the kiss was losing self control from both of us and he pulled back abruptly and immediately covered his mouth and nose with his forearm and looked away. He gripped the pillow next to me as I stared at him, catching my breath again.

    "I have to go," Kai told me before he teleported out of the room.

    I was alone once again, but not completely alone. Kai was still in the house, most likely, so that was a definite plus. He couldn't control himself with my scent, and yet here I am with a bleeding neck wound. I removed the shirt from my neck and it was drenched in my blood, but not too much. The deeper I delved into the thought of becoming a Vampire, the more grateful I was for remaining human. I can't stand pain, so there would be no way I would survive a Vampire infection. I barely survived the Werewolf infection around Christmas.

    I turned my thoughts to what Kai had told me about his past. His past as a human seemed depressing; losing his mother when he was only four, his little sister died when she was three, his father tried to kill himself, born and raised in severe poverty. And his rough life had to be topped off with a new life as a Vampire. I couldn't stop thinking about the girl Kai attacked; his first victim. Only eight years old...and Kai killed her in less than two minutes. He tried to kill her brother, and then he went on a rampage.

    The Fates has not been kind to either of us, but I guess they decided to spare us by pairing us up. I couldn't be any happier unless I'm with Kai...so far. I was incredibly happy with Akatsuki too, much happier than I had expected, and with my extreme imagination, I couldn't help but think that he probably received my note and is writing my name on his hit list...right below Kai's name.