• It was early evening on the night of April the 10th. The sun had just set over the skies of Wisconsin Dells, Wisconsin. 12 year old Mary was walking through a very large and dense pine forest. She was very careful not to talk to strangers on her way, seeing as she was an orphan. She knew the ways of the world, and an orphan is always the first to be picked off. That's just the tradition.

    She wasn't totally alone though, her kind and trusting Grandmama lived in a little cabin on the far edge of the woods, and Mary was instantly taken in. In fact, as a token, Grandmama sewed a little cloak for Mary, to cheer her up after her parents were mysteriously killed from contusions to the neck area. The little crimson cloak was with Mary every day since, so much so that everyone in town called her Little Red.

    On this evening, Mary was returning to her home from the market with a basket of groceries. Walking a narrow, root-infested path, she halted. A twig had snapped somewhere nearby. She threw herself behind the nearest tree, slicing her hand on a broken branch, leaving a swath of blood behind. She sat still as a mouse, fa quieter than one would expect of a 12 year old girl. Still she waited. Waited. Minutes passed and the noise had ceased. Heart still pounding, she stood herself up, vehemently dusting off her always-immaculate crimson coat. She turned, screamed, and turned again, of a mind to flee from the man she found inches from her face. He was suddenly on the other side of her.

    “Oh no dear, did I frighten you? Here, let me help you pick up those groceries.” He knelt to pick up the apples that had fallen when the basket tumbled from Red's hands as she screamed.

    “I don't talk to strangers. But thank you.” She took the basket, now with it's renewed load of apples, from the bare arm of the man. “Hm. How cold.” She walked a step or two and swiveled around. She took two sultry steps toward the man and then turned her back to him. “I know what you are.” Red stood there. And stood there. She started shifting her weight, darting her eyes around. The man just looked at her with a cocked head and raised eyebrow. “Aren't you going to say it?”

    “Say what?”

    “You know, the line. Edward says it, THE SEXY LINE???”

    “The sexy line. Yeah.”

    “Stupid vampire. . . It goes, 'Say it. Say it out loud!'”

    “Alright. 'Say it. Say it out loud!”

    “Vampire.”

    “I don't know who this Edward is, but he sounds like a prancing poof to me”

    “Vampires are so sexy. . .”

    “Uh. . .Thanks. . . .” Red was practically climbing him, while he was visibly trying to escape the lust for her bleeding hand. Best to wait. Yes. Shoving her away, he asked “So, um, where're you going with that basket of yours?”

    “Home to my Grandmama's. I just came from market. You know, I was just thinking. There are a lot of bad things out in this forest. Men and wolves always try to assault me for some reason. I was wondering. . .would you be my escort home? To protect me from all the really scary, evil things out in these woods?” The vampire chuckled.

    “Sure! I'll ward off the nasties for you!” Red scampered off down the path, with the vampire in hot pursuit. Following the scent of her blood, he found her quickly, and together they traversed the path back to Grandmama's house. Upon arriving, Red ran in front of the vampire, stopping him in his path. Pointing to the house like a lady on a game show, she proudly proclaimed:

    “My home!”

    “Bird number one.”, whispered the vampire under his breath. He made a quick scan of the clearing where the house stood. Having always had a keen eye for beauty, he stopped at the patch of flame colored tulips growing just beyond the clearing on the far end from the house. “What a lovely home you have! I'm sure those tulips over there would look splendid over top your mantle. Why don't you go and pick them. ”

    “What a lovely idea!” She ran to the other end of the clearing. The vampire swaggered over to the house. He glanced inside to see Grandmama asleep in bed, and ripped open the door. He took one step and smacked into the barrier.

    “Oh please! I always forget that part.” He leaned against the barrier and called out, “Hey, uh, Red!”

    “Yes?!” swinging around to face the house.

    “Your home is even more beautiful on the inside! May I come in?” He kept pushing on that barrier.

    “Why of course!” And he vampire fell through the barrier, quickly catching himself as to not make a sound to wake Grandmama. He walked over to her bedside, slid her nightgown down off her shoulder and at last settled down to his meal from her jugular. When he'd cleaned her out, he wiped the excess blood from her wound, pulled up the gown and set her back into a sleeping position. He went to the table across from the bed and sat, awaiting Red's arrival. Moments later, the door burst open, and there stood Red, flower bouquet in her hands. She placed them on the mantle and walked over to her Grandmama. “Are you napping, Grandmama? Then we won't disturb you” She then turned to the vampire, whose face had since morphed into its more demonic form. “Oh my God! What happened to your face?!”

    “I'm a demon, I changed. Duh.”

    She ran and took his hands, inching ever closer to him. “You mustn't call yourself that! You needn't think that; I believe in you.” The cross on her necklace now hung dangerously close to his neck and he jumped away in fear. “You needn't pretend around me; I know the truth”

    “Look, Red, I haven't got a self-esteem problem; I'M A BLOODY DEMON!!!!”

    She took a step toward him “But you aren't! I can feel your soul!”

    “Now this is just pathetic! As much as I love exploiting innocent children, your stupidity is really just pissing me off!” He growled and lunged at her, throwing her against the wall by Grandmama's bed. The force of the hit had pulled down the shoulder of Grandmama's nightgown, and Red saw the wound on her neck. She looked back into the gluttonous eyes of the vampire. “Finally! Some FEAR!!” And the little red cloak was filled with fresh crimson.