• There once was a duck who liked shoes. The duck's name was Lacy. One day Lacy the duck found the most beautiful shoe of all, but that shoe was on a foot. So Lacy the duck died.

    THE END

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    Once upon a time a lizard named Bartholomew wanted to go skydiving. So he bought a plane, with his uncle's money which he stole. Then he jumped out of the plane without a parachute, and he died.

    THE END

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    Long long ago in a closet far far away there was a toad named Krapo. Krapo the toad couldn't find his money that his nephew, Bartholomew, had stolen. So he could not buy food, and he died.

    THE END

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    Once there was a fish whale named Frosty. He didn't like his name, or the fact that he was a fish whale. So he was swimming one day and a falling lizard named Bartholomew fell on him and he died.

    THE END

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    Our story begins with a bear named Bob who liked honey. He got stung by a bee. He died.

    THE END

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    Julie was a kangaroo. She died.

    THE END

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    A hippo was named Marcus. He fell in love with a porpoise named Eloise. She loved him back, so they lived happily ever after.

    …and then they died.

    THE END

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    A long time ago there was a praying mantis named Applesauce. He liked dancing. So he danced with another praying mantis named Nancy. She ate his head. And he died.

    THE END

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    I'll tell you a story about Frank the bunny. He was a mean bunny. So the other bunnies got together and formed a mob with kangaroos and a porpoise. And they went to his house and they burned it down. And he died.

    THE END

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    Rex the zebra ate too much cheesecake. So he a'sploded. (That means he died.)

    THE END

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    Samantha the spider ate her husband. Then she ate a fly (I don't know why). Then she died. (So did the fly)

    THE END

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    Eggy the pony liked Christmas. So he asked Santa for a parka. But he used too many Christmas lights. So his stable burned down. And he died. But he did get a parka.

    THE END

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    When George the moth met Stanley the monkey they didn't like each other. So Stanley ate George and George died, but George was poisonous, so Stanley died too.

    THE END

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    Have you ever heard the story of Jonah the banana? A gorilla named Oogie ate him. He died.

    THE END

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    I'm sure you've heard about Oogie the gorilla. He wasn't very smart. He ate a banana under a coconut tree. The coconut tree didn't like that, so it dropped a coconut on his head. He died.

    THE END

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    In the mountains there lived a llama named Lisa. Lisa liked pie. Pie didn't like Lisa. So she died from anaphylactic shock.

    THE END

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    During the Ice Age there was a flamingo named Clare. But it was the Ice Age, so she died.

    THE END

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    Mombo died.

    THE END

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    Mrs. Penguin had a pet rock. The rock's name was Steve. One day Mrs. Penguin was walking her rock Steve when all of the sudden an asteroid fell down and crushed her. She died.

    Steve didn't, he went on to live wild and free with the other rocks.

    And he didn't die, because rocks don't die. (silly…)

    THE END

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    An annoying Siamese cat was named Xena. She didn't die, because she was so stupid not even Death wanted her. So she lived to be fat.

    THE END

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    Once there were three sisters. They had no life. So they wrote stories. About things dying. The readers didn't like it. So the sisters ran away. Because the oldest had hair sticks that made them immortal. And the middle one had a transformers shirt that blinded their enemies with awesomeness. And the youngest had a book that filled them with endless knowledge…about cats.

    And so they lived.

    THE END